#it makes me really nervous with like the salaries and seeing people like crying and quitting and talking about how horrible it is

[nimoy]

so so so so fawking excited to go to the museum of nat history in la i got my & my bf tickets to the dinosaur experience w/the huge puppets 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩 the past few weeks have been ghoulish but i feel like i can finally catch a break now that im finally gonna see My Man after not seeing him since 2019 and having another job lined up & going back to school with a picture of what i really want to do for the first time… i have wasted so much of my life feeling sorry for myself and reclusing and i am trying to really see & taste a glimmer of the future!

[michixoxo]

"𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙙𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙨 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙩𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙤𝙣?"

you and main cast, where yall going?

John

put on your sunscreen! cuz you're going the fuck outside

takes you to a carnival in town for your first date.

he instantly wants to get you every single prize there is, doing multiple games, all rigged against him, and his frustration gets progressively higher.

until, the fated claw machine.

it was your mistake to mention that you'd love the cute pig plushie, because he spends quarter after quarter determined to get you it.

it gets to the point that you end up leaving to go get you both a soda, seeing how he won't even move from the machine.

with his last failed attempt, he slams his fist against the side of the machine, impossibly frustrated and out of quarters.

but, fate seems to be on his side, as the metal panel guarding the inside of the machine falls as a result of his punch.

can you really blame him for reaching his arm inside and taking a plush or two? or three? or... all of them?

he carries as much as he can, excited to show you. he can see you in the distance, only a little bit more, just a little—

"freeze! you're under arrest!", aw shit.

"you are being charged with destruction of property and theft. anything you say can be used against you in court.", he feels shame and embarrassment pool in his stomach as the altercation draws your attention, your hands covering your mouth in shock as he's cuffed.

as he is put into the carnival police car, he hangs his head low. i'm such a screw up. how could i be so fucking idiotic? they hate me, don't they? i fucking hate mysel—

"john!", your voice rings out even in the police car. he sees you, standing in the middle of the mountain of plushies. he sees as you pick up the prized pig plush, holding it in your arms.

"thank you!", you shout, smiling at him and waving. he tries to wave back, but resorts to shaking his head left and right, indulging in the laugh it pried from you.

even as the police car starts to move, his feelings are replaced with more welcomed ones: feelings for you.

he would take you mostly on casual dates when you start dating. you would go to places like arcades, fairs, and the like. cute picnic dates with each other, just talking and loving each other's company.

cute couple that ends up getting kicked out of every establishment they go to.

Sera

takes you to woaba boba for your first date.

what? it's not romantic? welp, that's rough buddy.

honestly, she doesn't feel the need to overly impress you. of course, she wants you to have a good time and have a good impression of her, but she isn't gonna stress herself out.

also uses it as a sort of test. she's had people, if they're brave enough, try to befriend her in order to benefit off her family's wealth, connections, and power.

so, if you don't like it, then you can happily take your business elsewher—? oh? you love boba? you always wanted to go here? you're thanking her?

hm. well, she may have been a bit rash. maybe you aren't like other people...

you blink slightly as she sips her boba, looking strangely pleased. did something happen..?

takes you to different hang out spots.

you'd go shopping together at the mall or spend time at a skating ring, whether or not either of you can skate is entirely irrelevant.

similar to john, you both get into a lot of trouble on your dates, though your chances of being caught are now halved 👍

badass couple that get progressively dumber the longer they are around each other.

Arlo

first date on the moon

okay not actually but its still exuberantly fancy

french restaurant in the heart of Wellston that has three michilen stars and a price range that would make the average man cry.

you're not surprised when you show up and he's wearing a suit that's the cost of the same man's salary.

classic candlelit dinner, the chef personally comes to serve you both. you pray that he doesn't believe in 50/50

not nervous at all. in fact, bro thinks he's the shit. (and he is but don't tell him that)

he knows he outdid himself with this one, and he knows that it's gonna impress you. still... you look sort of... bored—? well, no matter. he didn't pay the chef just for them not to have any tricks up their sleeve.

date goes well, because of course it did. still, as he walks you to your home, you look... less impressed than he hoped for.

did he do something wrong? did you not like the food? did you hate the restaurant—?,

"arlo!", huh? "there's a cat in the tree!", what did you want him to do about it? you stare at him with those pretty eyes, looking up at him. don't you remember that this suit costs a fortune? why not just call the fire department— "please, arlo..?"

...so what? he got a few twigs caught in his hair. and sure, maybe his suit is completely stained and torn from kitten claws and branches. but that sweet smile of yours, the impossibly bright light in that dim alley, is more than enough to make up for it.

takes you to expensive, classic dates. dinner dates are always a favorite, but you also go to nice lounges and country clubs to play golf or drink champagne.

elitist couple that thinks they are better than everyone and technically is.

Remi

first date is bowling, 90s style

she's very excited for the date, isen and blyke? not so much.

she had to practically chain them to a street lamp to be able to go with you on the date, and still, two guys in employee uniforms seem to be glaring at you an awful lot huh...

but anyways! the date is great! you both spend time with each other and take turns bowling. a fun sort of competition evolves from every passing round. she's... happy. she's really, really happy with you. and it's like she never wants it to end.

alas, a rumble of her stomach catches you both off-guard, resulting in a light chuckle from you and an embarrassed blush from her.

enjoying a burger, fries, and coke, you both sit together playing footsies in the food court. except, no good thing lasts for long.

a stray fry passes by your table, hitting someone behind you on the head. yet, despite doing something about it, the person simply cowers further in fear.

then, another fry. and another. and then a soda cup splatters hard and fast against them, covering them in a sticky, brown liquid. it's disgusting. it's revolting. and remi can barely stand to see it.

yet, for some reason, you grip tightly onto your own soda cup and stand up, your face obscured by the overhead light.

there's no way. no way you're gonna join in this, right? you were better than this, right? you wouldn't stoop to their level. no. no, how could you—?

your own soda cup slams against the face of the perpetrator, a sticky, orange fluid plastered all over them.

after the shock, remi's face almost shines. maybe, maybe you aren't like everyone else. she was right about you. and she's so happy she was.

takes you on classic dates. sharing a milkshake or pasta in a small diner is only one of her many ideas for you both. also likes going to fairs and carnivals, she'll win you so many plushies.

sweet couple that gives everyone diabetes with how cute you are.

Blyke

tries to do something similar to arlo and fails miserably.

first date at a fancy restaurant but he shows up 15 minutes late covered in dirt and mud on his suit.

ask him what happened and he'll brush off the fact that he lost his phone in the sewer drain and bought a fishing rod to get it out and it worked until he accidentally flung both fishing rod and phone into a tree that he had to climb but didn't realize was being actively cut down and got stuck on a semi-truck as he fell and terrifyingly slid off until he bounced and bumped and conveniently landed right in front of the restaurant.

but don't worry! just a few scratches and stains and oh, is there a bird in his hair?

sits down and— "pfft, do you see them?", huh?

"please, what an embarrassment. people like that shouldn't be here, they ruin it for everyone."

...y'know what? fuck them. it doesn't matter. he's here with you, and he won't ruin it by getting angry. he shouldn't be mad. don't get mad—

and suddenly, a cup of water is thrown at the talking man.

"hey! keep your ass out of our business! what makes you think you can talk about us when you're balding at, what, 30?"

after a few more comments comparing the man to mr. clean and a couple profanities later, you're both thrown out of the restaurant with nothing but the clothes on your back.

"psh, assholes. let's go, blyke.", "go? what do you mean?", you smile at him, standing up and offering your hand. "our date isn't over just yet."

he might just love you.

takes you on gym dates. just gym dates. only gym dates. and maybe a few coffee dates or dates at the beach.

superhero couple with all the energy of a shonen anime and the bad decisions to show for it.

Isen

first date at the mall

think about it, it's casual enough to not be taken too seriously but also enough activities to make it seem like he's putting in more effort than he really is.

he's a genius, isn't he?

sometime during the date, you both go inside a stationary store. there, he might've just met the love of his life.

a pen, no, the pen. everything from the smell, to the sleek style, to the vibrant red and black accents. it's beautiful. but he'll be damned if he's spending $300 on a singular pen, even he has his limits.

so, after staring longingly at it, he leaves along with you to the next place. it's fine, surely nothing wrong could happen now—

"hey! you there with the bad haircut!", huh? first of all, rude—

the security guard yells at him, telling him that he apparently stole the valued pen at the stationary store. that the cameras saw him looking at it and they know it was him.

not only is the dude embarrassing him in front of you, but his integrity is being called into question.

why is it always him? can't he have a simple day without things going wrong? he didn't even do anything! why is it always his fault—?

you step in front of isen, almost to protect him. "he wouldn't do that, he isn't like that. just because he was looking at it doesn't mean he did it. you don't even know him, not like how i do."

..? you're taking his side? even after what the security guard said?

his thoughts are stopped as the store owner comes up to the security guard, saying that after checking the cameras, someone with invisibility probably took it.

the security guard stops, looking rightfully embarrassed. "s-sorry, then. my mistake." what an—

"asshole. you think we're forgiving you that easily. you better start groveling right now, you pig."

... you're worse than him... which is kinda hot.

instead of taking you on dates, you both just do everything together. if he needs help with the press team, then you're the first person he's going to. if he needs to share a secret that's been weighing him down, then you're always there to lend an ear.

annoying couple that pisses everyone off in 0.420 seconds.

based on the values i think the main cast would appreciate/need in a partner:

john: forgiveness

sera: authenticity

arlo: kindness

remi: righteousness

blyke: courage

isen: loyalty

[sandbees]

A few about the Great Seven interacting with Twisted Wonderland characters VIA Yuu. 👀 I only have one word summary; Chaos.

Who would meet the Great Seven first? Obviously the first years (along with Ortho and Grim). They’re Yuu’s best friends after all.

Actually, it was Friday, the last day of the week. And coincidentally, that night would be a special night at the House of Mouse. Ariel and her sisters would be performing that night.

Mickey told Yuu that that they could invite anyone to watch the performance. So Yuu went to get special permission to take their friends along with them.

After kidnapping Ortho After Yuu gathers everyone, they explain that they’re going out to see a special performance at their workplace.

Keep in mind that no one knows exactly what Yuu’s new job was except Grim and Crowley. So naturally everyone was in on it and curious. (Only Grim knows about Yuu meeting the Great Seven though)

Ace: So where do you work at?

Yuu: I work at a club.

Epel: ...As in a strip club or a book club?

Yuu: Wtf Epel? It’s like a club but no alcohol. It’s technically a restaurant but they have live shows and put on a lot of performances so-

Deuce: Oh! That’s cool, we get to see it together!

Yuu: Actually I’m not going to be with you guys. I’m on duty that day so I’ll be waiting tables. But I’ll join during break.

Ace: Really? Bummer.

Ortho: Aw, I wanted to hang out with you too! But it will be fun nonetheless. :D

Yuu tells them to wait downstairs as they go upstairs to get everything ready.

They are low-key nervous, because the House of Mouse isn’t...exactly normal by Twisted Wonderland standards.

Meanwhile, Grim was telling the first years about Yuu’s experiences there.

Grim: You know, the House of Mouse is really popular, I’ve heard about a lot of customers Yuu has met.

Deuce: This job must have been hard...I’m glad Yuu got it though!

Grim: Yeah, they pay them 5,000 madol! Isn’t that great?!

Sebek: 5,000 madol?! That’s a lot more than being a waiter.

Ace: In a week? I mean having a salary of 5,000 is pretty impressive.

Grim: Hehe, it’s actually 5,000 a day.

First Years: WHAT?!

Jack: To be able to pay that much...the owner must be wealthy.

Epel: Yuu lucked out!

When Yuu comes down, the first years are asking a billion questions.

How did you find a job with such a high pay??? Is the work good?? Is your boss nice to you?? Explain everything-

Yuu assured them that their job is just waiting a bunch of tables, and that they’re payed well because the place is very popular.

Anyways, Yuu tells them that they’re going now and leads them upstairs.

“Shouldn’t we be going to the hall of mirrors-?” “It won’t work.”

The group kind of loses their mind as Yuu casually pushes Ace into their mirror, Grim follows behind.

“Come on, or do I have to push you through the mirror like I did with Ace?”

Safe to say is that they go through the mirror and are greeted with a very lavish dressing room.

“Wait woah this isn’t Mickey’s dressing room.”

Yuu finds a note and read it out loud. Apparently Mickey moved the mirror to a new room so they could have privacy. Anything in the room is for their use.

“I’m going to cry. He’s so nICE I DON’T DESERVE THIS-“

Yuu is pretty happy with this arrangement, actually. They also begin to explain the club’s shtick to their friends.

“So this is basically a club for entertainment with live shows and also cartoons on the screen. Oh, and sometimes a cat named Pete tries to sabotage the show so he can kick everyone out and make this his club.” “Isn’t that illegal-“ “Not if there’s no police.”

So anyways Yuu leads them outside and they run into Goofy.

Sebek: Is that-?

Yuu: Hi Goofy, I’m bringing my friends to a table for the show-

Goofy: Yuu! There you are! You’re needed at table 14.

Yuu: What? But my shift hasn’t started-

Goofy: Reservations from Hades himself.

Yuu: Oh shit, ok yeah I’ll be there as soon as possible-

Ortho: Hades? As in the God of the Underworld?

Yuu: Yes, I’ll explain later, more importantly let’s go find you a table.

Ace: I think not telling us you actually met one of the GREAT SEVEN!

Yuu: I did tell you; and you didn’t believe me.

Everyone is vibrating in nervousness and excitement. Especially Ortho. I mean, this is the GREAT SEVEN we’re talking about!

Yuu decides to introduce them to Hades. But surprise surprise, it’s all of the Great Seven!

Yuu’s first year friends are going to pass out from shock. Oof.

With some inquiry, Yuu explains to the Great Seven that the friends they brought were from Twisted Wonderland.

Let’s just say that the First Years got invited to sit at their table. (Sebek is quaking at the idea of sitting with the Witch of Thorns)

So while Yuu leaves to start work (not after taking all of their orders first, of course), the Great Seven begin asking the first years + Grim questions.

The first years are expectantly tense, but they loosen up.

Ursula and Jafar are a little disappointed that no one from their dorm is present, but they seem to easily forget that after Yuu tells them that they know people from their respective dorms anyways.

Yuu also gives them a little more information they found about their respective dorms, so that they don’t feel...left out? (Satisfied is a better word for it)

Ursula pets Grim and Jafar feeds him crackers. Grim does not complain, he’s fine. He becomes more compliant as his tuna arrives.

And some of the other’s thoughts? Well...

The Queen of Hearts almost blew up in anger at Ace and Deuce. They are idiots that do nOT KNOW THE PROPER WAY TO SPEAK TO THEIR SUPERIORS AND THEY HAVE BROKEN AT LEAST 359 RULES ALREADY-

But somehow, the Queen of Hearts warms up to the idiotic duo. She sees them as...annoying children she has to babysit but they’re also really adorable that she can’t stay mad at them forever. Plus, Deuce is trying and Ace has these wonderful card tricks that would make her Jester cry.

So at first, she does not approve, but as the night progresses she does. 8/10 would meet the ADeuce combo again.

Scar and Jack...hm. Well, I don’t think they’d get along of Scar’s sense of morality and justice of the past was brought up. However, the villains all agreed to not bring up their villainous past because they didn’t want to scare away Yuu/make them wary and distrustful of them. Same goes for the first years.

Anyways, Scar is impressed at how buff Jack is. He isn’t surprised though - he expected residents of his dorm to be powerful. Scar lays down some well deserved praise and Jack eats it up with a tail wag. Jack also talks about his dorm and what the dorm represents. Scar’s ego rises 100x and Scar becomes somewhat...egotistical. Well, maybe not like in a “I’m shoving my ego in your face” type of ego but in a “This pleases me and I will treat you kinder” ego.

Basically, Scar opens up a little more to Jack as the night progresses. Like a mentor/student bond.

The Evil Queen and Epel...well, the Evil Queen was quite picky with how Epel was acting. Yes, he had the proper posture but really, he was using the wrong forks to eat that particular kind of food. She expected better from someone who came from her dorm. So she ended up chastising him and scolding him for being “improper”. Like Vil.

She was shocked to say when Epel accidentally snapped back at her, before returning to his more “princely” persona. Ah, so the child had more than meets the eye. She tried a different approach, as in trying to ease Epel into talking to her. Certainly, Epel was much more headstrong and willful than that naive Snow White.

So, the Evil Queen and Epel have a rocky start, but by the end of the show.

Hades and Ortho...well, that’s a combo you never see everyday. But I think Hades would basically adopt Ortho. As in suddenly he gets father vibes from the kid. He’s also particularly interested in his own dorm, and asks Ortho about it. Ortho’s pretty chatty with Hades, and is happy to tell Hades about his dorm! He also asks a few questions himself; which Hades happily obliged to.

...and then it turns into Ortho talking about Idia and how wonderful he is. And Hades is like, “damn, this kid has a wonderful big brother. How come my younger siblings act like shit to me-“

So Hades silently swore to the River of Styx to keep this child safe, and Ortho had a fun time interacting with Hades!

Sebek and Maleficent...well, it could have been worse.

Poor Sebek was tense and tight lipped for most of the night. He really wanted to make a good impression on Malleus’ grandmother. (I don’t think Sebek has met Maleficent yet so-)

Maleficent was patient, however. She knew Fae kind were raised to think of Maleficent as a high authority figure that should be treated with upmost respect. Unlike the other kingdoms; the Valley of Thorns praised Maleficent like a goddess. She didn’t blame Sebek for acting like he was.

So she started with baby steps. Talking about how wonderful it was to meet her grandson’s bodyguard, how Malleus must have grown to be a strong magician, how she wished she had stayed to know more about her grandson.

Actually, the breaking point between the tense atmosphere between the two was Malleus. Sebek opens up a little more as he continues to talk to Maleficent.

At the end of the night, they’ve only talked about Malleus, but Maleficent was content with that. After all, keeping up with what her grandson was doing was more than enough.

By the end of the night, the First Years enjoyed the special performance and their time with the Great Seven. Things went well especially when Yuu came to join during their break.

So when it was time to go, everyone had happily said their goodbyes as they were ready to return.

“Oh, before I forget...Yuu, I have almost completed the portals for the others so do expect one of us to pop in soon.” “Oh, ok!” “...THEY MIGHT VISIT US?!”

Everyone is low key excited to meet again though.

So, the first years go through the mirror and stay at Ramshackle, chatting away at their time at the House of Mouse.

_=_

Yeah, this was a looonngg write, I’m actually going to do the rest of the TW cast in another post. I hope you enjoyed this one! :)

[smileyoongle]

Falling for a lounge singer (Yandere!Mafia! BTS)// Kim Seokjin

Requested anonymously.

Summary: Working as a part time singer, you never thought you'd find yourself becoming the centre of attention of a man's life, especially one who you can't run from.

Word Count: 2K

You bowed before the audience at your workplace, an empty smile tugging at your lips as you finally walked down the stage and made your way to the bar. This was the third consecutive day in a week where your boss had made you work overtime without paying you for it. You knew that as a singer who performed in a small but reputable lounge bar, you weren’t worth that much. In fact, the reality was that you could be replaced at any given time, the city not having any less talented singers than you and that made you insecure about your job all the time. But either way, you were just stuck here, trying to push your way through every single day just to clear all your debts.

Life was unfair. It had always been.

Sitting down on a bar stool, you leaned across the counter and rested your elbows on it, the cold surface feeling good against the warmth of your skin. The speakers in the lounge were now playing the latest radio hits, the beats making your head hurt as you were handed a glass of water by the bartender who looked at you with a pitiful smile. Thanking him, you sipped on the water before your manager made his way to you and placed a champagne coloured envelope before you. Frowning in confusion, you gave him a questioning look which he returned with a nervous but angry expression.

“Someone left a tip for you,” he sneered, clearly not liking the fact that you had received money which wasn’t given by him. An asshole is what he was, his intentions of seeing you worried sick becoming more and more obvious with every passing night.

Pursing your lips, you unsealed the envelope only to find a lot of money, money that was probably worth your salary of six months. Your eyes widened in surprise, lips parting as you tried to make sense of why someone would tip you off with so much cash. You weren't even that good and you could never be that good.

“Who?” you asked, following your manager’s gaze to the exit where a bunch of men were making their way out. Almost immediately, you were on your feet with the envelope tightly clutched between your fingers. You needed to know who this man was that was so generous to you. Needed to know what about you was worth so much.

Holding your dress with one hand, you made your way towards the exit, eyes worriedly fixated on the doorway which was now empty. The bouncers nodded at you in acknowledgement while you forced a smile upon your lips and exited the bar, a part of you thinking that he must have left. But just as you came in contact with the cold night outside, your eyes took in the sight of an expensive car with a man dressed in an equally expensive suit surrounded by, you were guessing, his bodyguards. You couldn’t see his face yet, only his back being your line of sight but judging by everything, he certainly was someone in power. But if that was the case, what was he doing in a place so...average?

Deciding to end your curiosity, you called out to him, not knowing that this man was going to turn your life around completely. In a good way or bad? That was for you to choose.

“Excuse me, Si-”

Right then, your heel decided to give away, your ankle twisting painfully before you tripped...except you didn’t. Instead, you felt two hands taking a hold of your waist to steady you, your hands immediately latching onto their shoulder in return. And that’s when you finally saw him.

Kim Seokjin.

The man who was known to be running the biggest drug cartel around the country.

Your breath hitched as your eyes widened in recognition, a shiver running down your spine upon the realisation that he was here and he was holding you. Your fingers involuntarily tightened around his bicep, his eyes intently taking in your face as if you were his prey and he, your predator.

“Are you hurt, sweetheart?” he asked, snapping you out of your daze. Swallowing thickly, you shook your head, too afraid to even move because what could you even do? If you had known that Kim Seokjin was the one who had tipped you off, you would have probably just handed the money to your manager without confronting him. But here you were, stuck in a situation that you didn’t know how to get out of.

Your ears perked up at the sound of a car door opening, your eyes darting towards the black vehicle that now mocked at you with its open door. Jin swiftly picked you up without a word, a small yelp escaping your lips as you stared at him with fear and panic.

Were you being kidnapped?

Before you could think any further, you were placed onto a cool leather seat, your legs dangling to the side where the door proceeded to stay open. You watched Jin kneel down before you, his hands gently taking off your heel to inspect your ankle as a frown made its way to your forehead. The sudden act of kindness was making you very confused and you didn’t know what to do about it.

Maybe he just treated people nicely before he got rid of them?

A sudden pressure to your ankle had you whimpering and pulling your foot away, your teary eyes meeting Jin’s as he looked up at you with a soft gaze only to have his heart ache upon seeing you in so much distress.

In all honesty, this wasn’t the first time Jin was seeing you and the fact that he had tipped you a fortune was no coincidence either. He had walked into this bar for a deal about a month ago when he saw you, your voice being the first thing that captivated him. You looked absolutely stunning in a satin dress with your lips stained red, your smile taking his breath away even though it was just for show. Ever since that night, he just knew he had to see you and know you even if it meant coming to this place.

When you went to the rooftop to cry your heart out, he was right there in the shadows, wondering just what he could do to take your worries away. When you were being yelled at by your landlord, he was right there holding himself back from ruining that man's life. In short, every single time you thought you were alone, you weren't. Jin was always there, slowly figuring out where he was going to fit himself in your life. This tip that he had given you was guaranteed to solve your problems but along with that, it also made sure that you would want to see him. And that's all he really needed.

“You’re hurt, sweetheart. I don’t think you can walk-”

“Are you going to kill me?” Jin frowned upon hearing your question, feeling a little hurt that the girl he was so insane about, thought that he'd lay a hand on her, let alone kill her. But he had only himself to blame for having an image that was tainted with the blood of many, innocents and devils alike.

"Why would you think that, Y/N?" He asked, placing his hand on the empty space beside you. Your lips trembled as you struggled to answer, your eyes taking in the number of guards around you two. As if reading your mind, Jin quickly dismissed them, your shoulders slightly relaxing as you watched them walk away to where you couldn't see them. Feeling a little hopeful, you wiped away a tear that fell down your cheek and held your head up.

"I know who you are and what you do," you answered, biting your lip as you watched a wave of disappointment wash over him. Jin had been left speechless and he knew that, his jaw clenching and unclenching out of habit. Rubbing the bridge of his nose, he sighed, his hand gently taking yours into his as you tensed in your seat.

"I need you to listen to me carefully, sweetheart," he stated, drawing your attention to him and him only.

"I have been watching you for a while now," he confessed with apology filled eyes looking right into yours, "and hurting you, is the last thing I want."

Those words had you feeling breathless, too many emotions bubbling up your throat and making you wanna throw up. You had been the subject of a very dangerous man for quite some time and you had no idea. On top of it all, he said he didn't want to hurt you and you found yourself believing him. Maybe it was the way his eyes held so much adoration for you or the way he held onto you like you were a fragile little doll, you didn't know.

"Wh-what do you want then?"

"To love you," he answered without any hesitation, his hand coming up to brush away your hair from your cheek. His touch was warm, almost comforting, something you hadn't had in a very long time. Having been so lonely all this time, the idea of being cared for and loved seemed too tempting to let go. And knowing just how powerful Kim Seokjin was, it was very obvious that no one would ever dream of hurting you, be it mentally or physically.

But, were you really willing to choose comfort over the fact that he was a murderer?

"M-Mr. Kim, you don't even know me. I'm a normal girl who has a simple life and being roped into yours is the last thing I need."

You stated, noticing the way his eyes held a hint of sadness that seemed to be barely there. Swallowing thickly, you stood up with a pained expression, quickly taking your heels in your hand as you glanced at Jin one last time. This was the right decision, in your mind. Because there was nothing worse than having to live with a man, knowing he was cold and brutal. It was almost as if you'd be his partner in crime, something you just couldn't digest.

Limping towards the bar, you sighed in relief as a sudden silence surrounded you. Jin hadn't said a word to your rejection, making you think that he had understood what you were trying to say. The chilly air felt comforting now, your breath coming to you in waves of warmth. But before you could open the door to the bar, you heard a light click behind you.

Frowning, you turned around, your eyes growing wide upon coming face to face with the muzzle of a gun. Seokjin stood holding it firmly, his eyes red and angry. Your lips began to quiver immediately, your ears taking in the sound of his guards gathering around you.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart, did it sound like you had a choice?" He sneered, stepping forward and pressing the muzzle against your forehead. You slowly shook your head, a full stream of tears falling down your cheeks as you dropped your heels and joined your hands together.

"Please don't hurt me. I'm sorry I didn't-"

"Shh sweetheart, shh," he whispered, sliding the gun down your cheek and pressing it against your jaw. You could feel his arm holding your waist firmly, a scared whimper making its way out of your lips.

"You have no idea just how crazy you've been driving me, Y/N. Ever since I've seen you, I haven't stopped thinking about you," he mumbled, staring into your eyes so intensely that if not for the present situation, you would've deemed it romantic.

"Every second I've been thinking of things I'd like to do to you. And I can't have you take that away from me now, can I?" You closed your eyes, your body shaking as you sobbed at his words. The proximity was starting to suffocate you, your hands desperately trying to push Jin away from you but he was too strong.

"Let me go, Jin. Please let me go," you begged, your eyes drooping shut as you grew tired, your head falling against his chest. His hand came up to the back of your head, caressing your hair as he pulled you flush against him.

"Not any time soon, sweetheart," he replied, suddenly pulling back and gesturing the guards to the car. Large hands came to grip your arms, a scream sounding through the night as you were pushed inside the car you were seated in before. Your palms pressed against the leather, the door closing shut behind you as you sat up and banged your fists against the window. Spotting Jin outside, you cried louder, hoping he'd take pity on you. Instead he leaned down to where your palms rested on the window, placing his exactly against yours.

"I promise you'll be happy, sweetheart. I promise."

A/N: Guess who's back! That's right! Me! A dumb bitch! Anyway, I'm so sorry for not posting for like more than a year but for some reason, my brain went on a break and it just didn't wanna come back. So much has happened in the time I was away and I wanna give y'all so many deets like, boy trouble- check, best friend turning out to be a bitch trouble- check, getting two surgeries within a span of two months- check. In short, my life is a mess and I'm loving it.

Also, this turned out really long for like all the members, which is why I'm gonna post them separately. I hope I give you guys the same vibes from my writing as before. Or I'd die from shame. Okay I'm off now! Tell me if you liked it.

[maybe-your-left]

BITCH I AM DEMANDING A FLUFFY PART TWO TO KYLO FORGETTING OUR DATE OKAY?!

I WANT SWEET AND NASTY MAKEUP SEX

HAHAHHA YESSSSS. here is part one of Kylo forgetting our anniversary.

“Hey.”

You sighed into the phone, slumped on the cool leather couch. The TV blaring before you, but you didn’t listen to what was on. It had been two weeks since you kicked Kylo out, the only communication shared were clipped texts and stale ‘Hi’s’ and ‘Byes’ when he needed to pick up clean clothes.

“Hi.”

Kylo took in a slow breath, you could practically feel the air hit your face. So close, yet so far, “Are you gonna be home today?”

“Yup.”

“Cool, I’ll be there at 12 during lunch. I have some shit to grab.”

You bit back sniffling, “Okay,” your voice cracked. “I’ll be here.”

———

You scrolled through your emails, waiting at the kitchen counter for him to show up. You'd applied for some jobs a few days ago if this was really the end of you two. You needed a job, there was no way you could afford living in the penthouse and at some point, Kylo would want it back.

It was in his name anyway, the only thing you really owned without his help was your laptop.

Fingers crossed you'd find something, you haven't worked in almost five years. You didn't need to with Kylo, and he urged you to not work. He wanted to take care of you, provide for you, help you in any way he could. But now, you were left high and dry, not even a single bank account in your name.

You swallowed back another round of tears, no.

No more tears, you'd get through this. You had family who would help, friends that supported you and wanted you to be happy. Even his mom, not that you'd stoop that low, was willing to help you.

It would be better to just cut all ties to him since there was a slim chance he would want to be back together.

You still weren't sure, you missed him. Terribly, barely sleeping because his presence was gone. Jumping towards your phone whenever it rang, hoping it was him on the other side calling to make it up to you.

But the man was stubborn, angry that you kicked him out.

Claiming that his accusations were valid, which wounded you further.

A light knock on the door drew you away from your wallowing, you took a shaky breath before whispering a faint, "it's open."

Kylo walked in slowly, dressed in his work clothes. A button-up, white, with his suit jacket and tight dress pants. His hair was getting longer, the harsh lighting of the kitchen showed a sheen of grease coating it.

And the bags, the bags under his eyes were darker than normal.

A part of you was smug over his appearance.

But the rest of you ached, fighting against your baser instinct to run towards him. So he could take you in his arms while you bathed him in kisses, mourning over the time spent apart.

"Hello," he nodded stiffly towards you. Not making eye contact as he shut the door. Kylo fiddled with the strap on his shoulder, his duffel bag hanging limp. Empty, ready to stuff more things inside before he ran away to whatever place he was staying.

"Hey," you croaked, eyes flitting back to your laptop. Biting your lip as you read through rejection after rejection, no one wanted you. The gaps in your resume were too long, your diploma meant nothing since you had zero experience.

Kylo's shoes scuffed the floor, sniffing loudly before he looked at you.

"I was going to grab some more things," he glanced towards the staircase, "All my stuff is at the dry cleaners right now, I've worn these pants two days in a row."

"That sucks."

He hummed, "Okay," backing away from you slowly. You watched him walk towards the stairs, back tense and straight. His hands were tucked into his pockets, something he did when he was nervous or uncomfortable.

You used to make him comfortable.

Now you just agitated him, even though it wasn't your fault you two were in this mess.

You stayed quiet as he rummaged around upstairs. Doors opening and closing, drawers slamming shut, you briefly heard swearing but you couldn't make it out. You hadn't thrown his stuff away, keeping everything organized. Right down to the hair products that he had left.

Color-coded and alphabetical by the sink.

His footsteps echoed to a stop, maybe he was considering kicking you out...

"Have you seen my black sweater?"

You stilled, his black sweater... "Nope."

A huff in annoyance, "The one that has the hole in the front, from when it got caught while we were in Niagra? It's not in the closet."

That's because I hid it, you thought. You'd been sleeping in it for the past week, it smelled like him and enveloped you like his arms used to. No way you were giving it back, call it a sacrifice of your relationship.

You listened to his slow descent to the kitchen, duffle now stuffed with clothes. He eyed you suspiciously, rolling his tongue along the inside of his cheek. Coming dangerously close to your seat, he angled himself behind you. A little to the left, but enough for him to spy on your computer screen.

"You're applying for jobs?"

You slapped your laptop shut, he didn't need to snoop.

"None of your business, Kylo."

He shrugged, looking up at the ceiling as he replied, "Might be good for you, to get out of the house."

"Mhm."

"You'll want to apply to multiple places," he stepped around you, opening the fridge for a brief glance inside. Spying one of his protein shakes that you hadn't thrown out, wasn't expired yet. Kylo cracked it open and took a small sip, "You won't be able to afford this place with entry-level salaries."

"Yes," you snapped at him, "I know that."

"Just trying to help, (Y/N)."

You climbed off your stool, moving away from him to curl on the couch. Already on the verge of tears, "You aren't helping, you're just being rude."

"Well, it's rude of you to steal my shit when we aren't together anymore."

That made the waterworks start, muffling your sniffles with your fluffy blanket. You tucked yourself away, desperate to disappear. Maybe when you woke up, everything would be back to normal, or you could wake up seven years earlier to avoid ever meeting him. Save yourself from the heartache that was tearing you apart from seam to seam.

You listened to the echo as he walked towards you. Huffing when he saw your shivering form, "I don't know why you're crying. I haven't been staying here for two weeks, we clearly aren't together."

"Whatever, Kylo," you whispered, voice breaking as you took in a wet breath, "Can you just leave?"

"Sure."

------

"I can't afford to stay there mom," you whimpered into the phone, you were stalling in your car. Parked in the garage of the apartment, you had been to an interview. Realizing the pitiful reality of your life, you had already begun to sell your designer clothes. Gucci purses, red bottoms, Tiffany earrings, Cartier bracelets, you name it. Anything that could help you create a bank account was sold off.

"Have you talked to him at all? Kylo wouldn't leave you high and dry, if anything he would pay for you to get an apartment."

"I don't want his help," you hissed.

A pause, "It would be humiliating to ask, I know he's expecting it. After the talk about jobs, he's just been waiting for me to cave and sacrifice my dignity."

"I'm just saying it wouldn't hurt to talk with him, I know you both have been avoiding it after the fight. It could bring you both some closure-or better yet-get you guys back together so I can get some grandbabies."

"Goodbye, mom."

You huffed as you hung up, slamming your head back into your headrest. Maybe you could sell the car, people would pay top dollar for a gold Porsche. But the title was in Kylo's name, birthday present, any money you'd earn would belong to him.

You pulled up your text thread, the last messages sent were from three days ago. He left you on read, you texted him goodnight after a few stale messages about your day and when he could come and move some furniture out. Kylo had gotten an apartment on the upper east side, right by his office. You checked the old Zillow listing, it was huge and ridiculously expensive.

Enough room for him and a new girlfriend, you were certain he was already fucking someone else. With how cruel he was with you, not even trying to make amends. Probably his secretary, she was always a slut. Showing off her tits to him, even when you came to visit. Kylo probably bent her over his desk the day after he left, just because he could.

You swallowed your pride, it was now or never.

Kylo, I think we need to talk.

Send.

Let's see how long it... oh?

What happened, I'm at work right now.

Quick, maybe he got the notification on his laptop.

Could I swing by the office?

Right now?

Yeah.

Typing...

I have a shareholder meeting at 2, make it quick.

You sped towards his work, determined to get there before he changed his mind and banned you from coming. You were shocked he even agreed, maybe he was having a rare good day.

Or forgot that you two were broken up.

After parking, you jogged into the building. No need to say hi to anyone, it was embarrassing enough to be the ex-girlfriend visiting. At least you were dressed up, people wouldn't think you were in the poor house, yet.

You smiled coldly at his secretary, not bothering to tell her what you were here for. Despite her stuttering about him having a meeting at 2, she was totally fucking him. There's no way she wasn't, a man like him can barely go a day without sticking his dick in something.

Whipping open the door, you were met with the uncomfortable silence that blanketed his office. Curtains were drawn, lights on the dimmest setting, the only noises were the door creaking and his fingers typing.

Like he was punishing the words, Kylo was good at breaking keyboards with his aggressive emailing.

You cleared your throat, watching as his eyes briefly flickered towards you before moving back to the screen. Okay, you walked slowly towards his desk. Pulling out a chair as quietly as possible, the leather squeaking when you sat.

Kylo let out a long sigh, leaning away from his screen. "What is it you want to talk about?"

With a harsh swallow, you fiddled with the hem of your skirt. Anything to avoid his penetrating gaze, "I just wanted to talk about, you know."

He blinked, face blank, "Use your words, please. I don't have time to fuck around, I have a business to run."

"I-I-I"

"Spit.it.Out."

"How come you never apologized?"

Silence.

Kylo's jaw clenched and unclenched, leaning back in his chair slowly. Staring directly at you, "This conversation?"

"Yes, I need to know."

"What good is it doing us now?"

"I don't know I just-"

"What are you hoping to gain from this?"

"Kylo-"

He huffed loudly, "I don't have to answer you anymore, we aren't together."

You slammed a fist on his desk, rattling a few pieces he had decorating it. Standing on your wobbling legs, "Listen to me, you can be an asshole all you fucking want but I deserve answers."

Kylo narrowed his eyes, standing slowly before you. His form towering, making you feel even smaller than you already felt. Crawling to his office for closure, and instead, he wanted to argue with you about the necessity of the conversation.

You watched his palms lay flat on the polished wood, crinkling papers he had strewn about.

"If you're here for money, just fucking say it."

"I am not here for-"

Now it was his turn to slam the desk, "Bullshit! You're here to fucking grovel because you don't know how to take care of yourself. Can't even get a second-rate job!"

"You're the one who insisted on taking care of me!"

"So you think it's okay to demand money when we aren't together? Selling off all the shit I bought you to pay the power bills?"

You gaped at him, "I would never."

"Shut up," Kylo spat, leaning further across to be nose to nose, "You forget that I have your email linked to my laptop. I can see every pathetic message about pawning what I worked for. What I provided you, fucking ungrateful."

"How dare you sneak through my email!?"

"It's not sneaking if I have the passwords, darling."

"You can't fucking do that," you pushed away, arms folded while you glanced around the room. All your pictures were gone, more proof that showed he was erasing your existence, "At least I'm not already fucking someone..."

"Excuse me?"

You spoke over your shoulder, "You heard me."

"Are you seriously accusing me of that," Kylo scoffed, "When that's what got us into this mess in the first place?"

You shrugged, "How long have you been fucking her, did you march to her place after I kicked you out?"

"(Y/N)."

"I'm a big girl, I can take it. Just tell me the truth, because there's no way you'd just abandon me if there wasn't someone else."

"(Y/N)."

You spun on your heel, snarling with a finger in his face, "How many women have you replaced me with? Huh? Or is it just your slut of a secretary-"

Kylo flipped his desk, everything crashing to the floor. You screamed as he began to throw items to the walls, tear books off the shelves, kicking his chairs to the ground. Anything he could get his hands on he attempted to tear apart.

"Enough!"

Heavy breaths.

"I'm not fucking anyone else! Are you fucking serious? All I've fucking done is work! Trying to just fucking move on but nooo," he faced you now, cheeks red and puffing. A few tracks of tears streaking towards his jaw, "You-you just have to be right, and have to be the victim of all this when it's both our fucking fault!"

Kylo paced away from you, running his fingers through his hair before crouching down to the floor. Cradling his face in his hands while he took in shaky breaths, "I fucking missed you, so much. It's all I thought about, but every fucking time I came back you ignored me."

"Kylo-"

"No, you fucking iced me out. I could barely speak to you and I wasn't going to do anything over text."

You succumbed to your tears, there was no way to hold them. Choking as you wiped away the floods, "I-I didn't m-mean to, you weren't talking to me Kylo. How was I supposed to r-react?"

Now he was crying, hiccuping in an attempt to steady his breathing and push through it like he always had. But he couldn't stop the tremor in his voice, "You could've told me you loved me or forgave me. Anything would've been better than this."

"Why do I have to be the one to apologize, I'm not the one who forgot our day and manhandled me in the tub! You were drunk, rude, and horrible to me, I deserved an apology."

"I know," he sniffed, "I tried to-the first few times I came back for clothes. But you hid from me."

You nodded slowly, pacing your way towards him. Unsure of how he'd react to you touching him, but you needed to be closer. You shuffled to his side, sliding your back against the gray wall to the floor.

"We've never been good at apologizing."

Kylo sat on the floor, mirroring you against the wall, "At least before, you didn't kick me out. Force me to crash on a couch, you know I don't fit on couches."

You chuckled softly, not wanting to smile at the visual.

"That's why our couch was custom," he laughed too, dull and humorless, "Because I kept sliding off."

"Yup."

Both of you swallowed, throats clicking in unison. Kylo shuffled in a more comfortable position, looking out at the clouded sky that peeked through the shades.

"For what it's worth, I am sorry."

A breath, "I never meant to miss our day, and I thought you were finished with me. I should've just spoken to you instead of drink, but that doesn't mean much now."

You hummed, "Thank you."

"I can write you a check," he sighed, "So you can get another place and still keep whatever's left of your collections."

"You don't-"

"I know I don't."

Kylo wrote you a check for half a million dollars, not looking at you when he ripped it from his checkbook. He mumbled about the bank may be needing to call him to confirm it, just have them call my office number.

Sending you off without another word.

------

Your new apartment was cute, small, perfect for you.

Light and airy, none of the fixtures were black or red. Hues of pink, coral, green, and blue danced around the rooms. Your couch was velvet, just because you wanted it to be. With an abundance of pillows and candles on every surface, you could fit them onto.

Your bed was a four-poster with a dreamy white canopy, soft and cloudlike bedding scrunched up from however you left them. No one was running around frantic to make the bed, or straighten the blinds, or draw the curtains, it was just yours.

The check was cashed with little fuss, you tried not to cry about it. You dropped off the old house keys at Kylos office, along with your car keys, there was no need to keep the Porsche. You weren't living that life anymore, you could buy your own car now! And it would be yours, it was too hard to drive the gift everywhere.

Kylo told you to keep the car when he found the keys, but you ignored his messages. He wouldn’t understand why you wouldn’t keep it, but that was his problem.

You sighed into your couch, looking at the TV nestled next to the bay window. Imagining where you could squish more houseplants… you already had an abundance but it wouldn’t hurt.

Your phone began to vibrate on the coffee table, startling you as you scrambled towards it. Oh, it was Kylo, odd.

“Hey?”

“Hey.”

“Uh,” you stood from the floor, scratching your cheek as you walked. “What’s up?”

He cleared his throat, “I saw you got a place, wanted to drop off a housewarming gift.”

Your face scrunched, balancing the phone between your face and shoulder. Popping a potato chip in your mouth, “Why would you do that?”

A sigh, “Can you just buzz me in? I brought wine…”

“Whatever.”

Kylo came in with a tight smile, dressed in some black joggers and a gray t-shirt. He looked like he just rolled out of bed, not his typical look on a weekday. He held up a brown paper bag, Whole Foods on the label.

"You went to Whole Foods?" you raised a concerned brow.

"Nope," he set the bag on your kitchen table, eying the plants and crystals that littered your living room. A few magazines were strewn around on the surface, "I had my secretary do it."

You glared at him, which he noticed before shaking his head rapidly, "New secretary-not the old one. His name is Brady, he's very nice."

Kylo stood with his hands in his pockets, glancing in every direction as you approached the bag. Humming when you began pulling out the goodies he had, as promised there was a bottle of wine. Your favorite, along with a set of glasses.

A clear purple tinge, almost vintage looking. Some of your favorite fruit, he blushed when you held them up to his eyes. Mumbling how you never had enough of them in the past, and it was their season.

Now you were blushing, finding some red velvet cupcakes. Packaged beautifully, and a small vase in the shape of a kitty. You placed it on the table, looking at it over and over. Biting your lip as you waited for something to happen.

"I like your place," Kylo croaked out, "It's very bright."

You chuckled, "You're just used to your eyes straining from all the red and black decor."

He hummed, walking down your hallway. Glancing indoors that were left open until he made it to your bedroom. You heard him groan when he saw the white sheets and canopy, Kylo whistled for you.

Obediently, you pranced towards him, taken aback when he was sprawled on your mattress. Facedown with his face in your pillow, groaning like he was trying to wake up from a good dream.

"I fucking forgot how good you smelled," he moaned out, looking over at you lazily, "What would I have to do to get you to make out with me in here?"

------

LOL, this was long, but I'll do a part three if you would enjoy the rest of their reunion.

TAGGING: @finn-ray-nal-beads​​​ @onlykyloscenes​​​ @candycanes19​​​ @historyandfandoms50​​​ @caelum-phyriina-vermillon​​​ @ghoulian13​​​ @mrs-kylo-ren​​​ @millenialcatlady​​​​ @relationshipwithmybed​​ @dancingmicrobes​​​ @wayward-rose​​​ @contesa-lui-alucard​​​ @daydreamsofren​​​ @insufferablelust​​​ @ohdamnadamm​​​ @mariesackler​​​ @caillea​​ @safarigirlsp​​ @jalexunderthestars​​​ @shesakillerkween​​​ @glassythoughts​​ @zimmermansbrat​​ @not-the-teen-witch​​ @jynzandtonic​ @roanniom​ @celestiasin @glassbxttles @cornmousequeen @driversmutbucket @blowthatpieceofjunk

Here is the link to my Mega Masterlist for all your stalking needs...

[dianapana]

SH Day 1: The Beginning of us

@sasuhinamonth

(Modern AU, OOC most likely)

“Kids, don’t forget to be very nice to Grandma today, it’s a difficult day for her” Hikari said once again, only to be met with silence. The woman sighed deeply and looked into the rearview mirror at her two teens, both with earphones in, typing away on their phones.

“They both love your mom; I know they’ve been in awful mood swings lately but they haven’t seen Hinata in a couple weeks.” Yuuta, Hikari’s husband tried to reassure her.

“I know, but this would have been dad’s birthday, and she always gets so sad around this time of the year. It’s been almost 10 years since dad died, but it still breaks my heart every time to see her cry”

Just as she finished talking the car stopped, Hikari did not have the time to turn around and ask her kids to be well-behaved because they were both out of their seats and running towards the house.

“These kids, I swear…” Hikari murmured to herself as she was putting her phone into her purse getting ready to get out of the car as well. She was just about to complain some more but was cut off.

“MOOOOOM, THE DOOR’S LOCKED”

That was it, the sentence that made her skin crawl, she froze in place. Hinata always waited for them by the window and would come outside when the car park, no matter how down she was that day, she would always be outside, but she wasn’t, the door was locked.

“Kids come back here,” Yuuta said softly while taking her purse. The kids got back into the car with wide eyes, confused but also scared. Hikari could not move, she stayed still and silent looking at her own hands as Yuuta went to unlock the door and then went deeper into the house. The few minutes he was gone felt both like a few seconds and an eternity.

He came out of the house with a deep frown on, he didn’t even have to say the words, they all knew. The kids cried Hikari fought against tears and Yuuta called his brother-in-law to tell him the sad news. Hinata had passed away in her sleep.

The week to come was a blur of phone calls and planning intertwined with crying, mourning and comforting. The funeral came and ended in a blink of an eye. Most of Hinata’s friends and generation had already passed, thus most of the people attending were distant family or kids of her friends. Regardless the room was filled with sobs and condolences. Just a few days prior Hikari complained about her kids growing up too fast, becoming adults that no longer needed her, but during the funeral, both of them held her hand as they cried throughout the ceremony.

Hinata was buried next to Sasuke, after 10 years of making him wait she decided to leave them and join him in heaven, part of Hikari was happy the two of them would meet again in the afterlife, but the other half of her was stubbornly missing her mother, needing her even in her adult life.

The last step of the process was cleaning out the house. It almost felt like blasphemy when they decided to sell the house. Sasuke built that house for Hinata, they started their family there. Even after Sasuke passed Hinata refused to move in with either of her kids because the house itself held importance to her. Two months passed since the funeral, but it still felt too soon, yet Yuuta and her elder brother were moving the furniture seeming not to understand the gravity of the matter.

Hikari on the other hand was on the floor of Hinata and Sasuke’s bedroom looking through photo albums of their childhood. She was reminiscing all the happy memories she had in the house, being in deep thought she didn’t hear her kids walking in until one of them affirmed loudly. “Wow Grandma and Grandpa look so young here”

Hikari looked over to see which photo they were referring to. It was a black and white shot of the two smiling, they were 19 at the time, Hikari knew the picture well, much like the story behind it.

“That was taken on their first date,” she said and the two kids looked up at her, waiting, expecting more, willing to hear the story. “Mom told me the story about a million times when I was a teen ‘If he doesn’t treat you like Sasuke treated me here, don’t bother he’s not worth your time Hikari’ she’d say”

Looking at the photo for a moment longer she could almost hear Hinata’s soothing voice as she was telling the story.

“The two of us met when we were small kids, our mothers were friends but we moved from Konoha after I entered elementary school. At the time the move was devastating, but as years went by, he slowly became a passing thought until finally I completely forgot about him and our friendship. Years later after, I returned to Konoha because I was assigned a kindergarten teacher post here. The first few days here were awful, I knew nobody and the other teacher was so rude and mean. I cried myself to sleep the first two weeks. I hated the apartment I stayed in as well; looking back, the apartment was lovely, but I hated being alone, I had never been alone before, and at the time being a single young girl in the city by yourself was frowned upon, and that mentality was so deeply rooted In my mind as well, I felt shame at times to come home to silence. I barely managed to get used to the job when I met Sasuke again, he was a young, handsome man; and he knew it too, if you think his ego is bad now you should have seen him back then. He came by the kindergarten to pick up his niece. He claims he remembered me and that’s why he kept approaching me, but I don’t believe that; I am telling you he fell in love at first sight.

I didn’t want to do anything with him, I was still having a tough time and a relationship would be too difficult to start at the time, but he insisted almost daily. It started out in a self-centred manner; he really believed himself to be the best catch out there, and he was, but still, it wasn’t very attractive at the time how he approached me in that way. So, after a few tries, he realized he should change how he tried to get my attention, he would bring me one flower every day when he came to pick up his niece; he apparently begged his sister-in-law to allow him to pick her up daily. Then, all of a sudden, he stopped coming, I didn’t ask about him because why would I, but his disappearance made me feel sad and disappointed; it made me realize how our small interactions actually meant so much to me and how much I basked in his attention.

A month passed and I had not seen him since, this time his memory was much stronger and harder to forget, but I was starting to lose hope of ever seeing him again. And just as I started accepting that fact, he returned with 31 flowers, one for each day he was absent, and a picture; a picture of the two of us as kids holding hands in the backyard of my old house. He looked so lovely, he was wearing a suit; it was the first time I saw him in one; he had just gotten an important job and couldn’t stop by due to the training program he needed to complete.

Before I could even get a word out, tell him I had missed him or that I was happy to see him, or how utterly surprising it was that we had met before; he started talking about fate and destiny, it was a lovely speech that painted us to be the one and only option for the other, it was very sweet. But once again he didn’t allow me to reply before asking me to wait. ‘Wait for a month’ he said ‘I will come and ask you on a proper date, one that I will be able to pay for with my first salary.’ I thought that was charming of him so I agreed.

Little did I know that a month later he’d show up once again with 31 roses and on a motorcycle. I had never dreamt of seeing one of those at the time, they were still so new and almost frightening. But I had waited for that date for such a long time so I decided to do things his way. He took me to the most expensive restaurant in the city.

The date itself is such a fun story too when he had to order he asked for the beef tartare, but he had never had it before and thought the condiments that came on the side were pre-portioned so he dumped everything in, it was so disgusting he couldn’t even take two bites out of it, so we ended up splitting my pasta. After the ‘dinner fiasco’ as Sasuke still refers to it, we continued our drive, he took me outside Konoha grounds to a small river bank where it was rumoured that you could see the most stars in the sky. That’s where we took the picture. We actually took about a dozen but we were both nervous, so either I had my eyes closed or his hands were shaking and the photo was blurred.

We leaned against the bike and looked at the sky for a while until he took my hand and held it, my heart was beating so fast I was certain he could hear it. I had never been on a date before, and the month of not seeing him made me realize my feelings, add to that a full month of waiting and expectations and I was a ball of stress, especially now that we were all alone in a secluded area. I had been fine at the restaurant, I was calm and collected while he had been the anxious one, but now the roles were reversed, he appeared to be so sure of himself and I was shaking all over. I thought the silence would be awkward, but it wasn’t, it was comfortable. I can’t even remember how long we looked at the starts and occasionally talked a bit, but I do remember the cool summer wind and his warm hand, I remember the mischievous glint in his eye, I was sure he’d kiss me, but he only looked at me and called me beautiful.

We only had our first kiss on date number six about three weeks and a half later, when I asked why he waited so long, he told me that Itachi gave him some advice, that at times waiting builds up suspense and makes the other person constantly think of you; which was true, all my thoughts would somehow lead up to him; and Sasuke said that he wanted me thinking of him as much as possible so I’d catch up to him; so, I’d like him just as much as he liked me. Poor him, not knowing I had already fallen deeply in love.

Don’t settle for less Hikari, they have to have an elaborate and intricate plan to get to you, and if it’s you doing the chasing follow your dad’s lead because I thought he was so charming.”

The story would forever be in Hikari’s mind, she would forever remember her parents as being deeply in love from their beginning until their last moments. The house was filled with memories, but so was she, she carried around all of the stories and moments of her parent’s love story throughout the years, and it was a beautiful tale.

[omg-im-such-a-masochist]

⛽️ 🔥 FIRE AND GASOLINE 🔥⛽️ (PART 1?)

Prompt: Y/N’s life has changed drastically, precisely 10 years ago and all because of an adorable lunatic and two little maniacs. But what will happen when a divergency of thoughts leads Y/N and her lunatic to say some pretty harsh words, that they know they will regret it later?

Word count: Maybe too long?

Pairing: Jon Moxley (or even Dean Ambrose if that’s your liking) x Reader

Warnings: For now, just some cursing and angst

Notes: His time has finally arrived and I couldn’t be more nervous about it! This goes out to my sincerely unhealthy love for Jon Moxley and my mixed feelings about having kids (sounds like a good match right?). Y’all know the drill loves,sorry for misspellings,english isn’t my first language (bla bla bla),check out my other stories if you’d like to(it would make your girl here very happy 😊) and if you’re comfortable with it,please let me know what you think? Some feedback is always welcomed and appreciated ❤️You can check out my other stories typing ‘masochist writes’ on the search bar on my page and my newest story as a fixed post.Okay,now let’s get to the fun part,shall we? Hope you’ll enjoy 😉

A light smile formed on my lips as I watched through the kitchen sink window Atticus and Rosie play in the backyard as I did the dishes. I never thought that my life could change for the better with a 6 and 4 years old..and to think that I never thought of myself as the maternal type.

The plate I was rinsing off almost broke on the sink as my body jumped from fright, when a pair of hands embraced my hips

“Oh God, you almost gave me a heart attack! Are you crazy?”

“Not really, just a little lunatic..” He laughed “I’m sorry it wasn’t my intention to frighten you, but once I saw that ass kitten I lost my fucking mind! Just like I did 10 years ago...” His hands roamed on my hips until they reached my ass that he lightly slapped. “Did you miss me, cherry?” His lips glued on the nape of my neck

‘Cherry’ that lame ass nickname he gave me 10 years ago...and all because my cheeks go incredibly red when I blush or whenever the weather gets cold making a huge contrast against my pale skin.

“Of course I missed you! This house gets too boring without you in it” I lightly chuckled

“Is that the only reason why you missed me?” He grinds his bulge on my ass, as an insinuation to what he actually meant by that question

“Jon, the kids are outside...”

“I’m not doing anything, I’m just asking an innocent question kitten” He nibs my neck

I turn around to face him, placing my arms around his neck leaning in for a kiss. It started innocently, but Jon Moxley wouldn’t be Jon Moxley if things were kept innocent.

His hands reached the hem of my tank top, sliding in to meet my bare skin, he roams up til he finally founds what he was looking for.

“Fuck baby, I missed these” He whispers as he softly but firmly squeezes my breasts. As much as I would like to have some fun time with my husband it’s not ‘adult time’ yet, which meant the kids were still up. So no ‘dirty deeds’ for us just yet.

I took the little bit of sanity I still had and broke the kiss

“Jon, that’ll have to wait babe”

He sighs “C’mon Y/N is just a quickie kitten, the kids won’t even notice you’re not here..just a few pumps in, I swear!”

“The last time you wanted to give it just ‘a few pumps in’ I was birthing Rosie 9 months later” I reminded him

“So? We love each other, we’re an adult couple with a beautiful family and a lot of love to give” He nibs my bottom lip “What’s wrong with having another little maniac? I wouldn’t mind! We make some pretty fucking good looking kids, we should start practicing another one now” He vaguely said

Oh God not this again... This has been a pretty heated topic between Jon and I, he was always crazy about kids but I wasn’t very fondly of them. When I found out I was pregnant with Atticus I lost my mind! I wasn’t sure about the whole ‘mommy’ commitment for life thing, I didn’t even knew if I had one single bone of motherhood in me. That soon changed though when I first held Atticus on my arms, at that moment I knew my heart was sold to some stinky bum that would call me ‘mom’ for the rest of my life. Rosie was a surprise too, we haven’t even talked about the possibility of having another kid and I was already pregnant with her.

Right after that the baby factory was officially closed to me but not for Jon, he wanted at least two more kids and I didn’t, he had a bit of a trouble understanding that back then I didn’t even wanted my first one! I love my kids, I would die for them in a blink but that doesn’t mean that I eagerly look forward being pregnant every goddamn year.

Jon’s job doesn’t help either, with him constantly being on the road I do most of the raising when it comes to the kids. Of course he still is an amazing father in the short amount of time he is home but still, I’m the one who has to do the working, cooking, cleaning, give baths, put to bed, take to swimming classes, brazilian jiu-jitsu classes, dentist appointments, running to the emergency at 3am because one of them is suddenly sick while the other one sleeps at the emergency’s waiting room chair, wiping off their tears whenever daddy has to leave again..

“Jon, not this topic again, please” I beg

“What is wrong with me wanting to discuss having another baby with the woman that I love?”

“It’s not that simple Jon, I wish it was but is not” I said slightly angry

“Yes it is that simple Y/N! You’re the one who’s always trying to complicate things” He let go of my hips

Great! Now he’s angry too. That’s just what I needed!

“Jon look, I don’t want us to fight ok? You just got home and we all miss each other so why don’t we drop it for now huh?”

I tried to wave the white flag, but I should’ve known it wouldn’t work with Jon ‘The Stubborn’ Moxley

“Of course you want to drop it, it’s not of your interest is it? No it isn’t! You always do this! Whenever a subject doesn’t matter to you, you don’t wanna talk about it, you’re always so selfish! Always thinking about yourself, never once caring about me or what I want! Selfish as fuck!” He raised his voice

When people say that words can hurt more than actions they were right. If he had punched me in the face it wouldn’t hurt as much as the harshness of his words. To say that I am selfish? After everything I left behind just to be with him? That hurt! And instead of doing the adult thing and keep my mouth shut before I said something I knew I would regret it, I did the Y/N thing where I run my mouth with harsher words than he’s previous ones just so I could hurt him as much as he hurt me

“I’m selfish? Me? Oh you better place the mirror in front of your own face to find the definition for that word Jonathan! You are the one who gets to make your ‘wrestler life’ on the road, living like a single man with not even one worry on your mind while I get behind with two kids and all the shit that comes with the package! It’s easy for you to say it with your 15 minutes FaceTime parenting that you do! In the mean time I have to be the bad guy who has to always say no because glorious dad is on the road chasing his dream for when he gets home he will do all of his kids luxuries so he can try to compensate his absence with Barbie dolls and hot wheels cars! So yeah I’m the selfish one Jonathan, good thing you notice that” I regretted those words as soon as they fell from my lips.

Jon’s eyes briefly showed the hurt caused by them but he soon replaced that with rage and pride before lifting his head up to say

“And is thanks to glorious dad that you have this comfortable house, a nice car and a shit ton of food on your table sweetheart. Let’s be honest here Y/N, how are you supposed to support yourself and the kids with your shitty excuse for a salary? I wipe my ass with the pitiful money that you make” He huffed

I’ve never felt so humiliated in my life. Yes my paycheck was mere cents compared to his, but I worked hard for my money, I was proud to have my own money, to share the bills with him and was proud for not taking the easy path of relying on a rich man to support myself (like my dear old mother proudly did). So the fact that he took something that was so prideful to me and used to humiliate me, made me for once rethink all of our 10 years together and if it was worth it at all.

Tears threaten to fall from my eyes and Jon seemed to have realized what he just said as for he reached his hand to cup my cheek

“Kitten, I-“

“Don’t! Don’t touch me, I don’t want you anywhere near me” I said in between sobs

“Y/N please I-“

“Mommy, why are you crying?” I saw Rosie’s smile die on her lips once she saw me crying.

I heard Atticus’ fast footsteps coming by the french doors to stop by Rosie

“Yay, daddy’s home- Mommy are you ok? Why are you crying? Did you get hurt?” His small but smart baby blue eyes roamed my face and my body for any signs of physical hurt

“Yes stinker, mommy got hurt” I said trying to hold back my sobs

“Where? I can’t see anything” Those clever blue orbs that were a faithful copy of Jon’s roamed through me once more trying to find the injury

“Why don’t you guys come here and tell daddy how much you’ve missed him while mommy goes upstairs to clean up the scratch?”

They just nodded and ran towards Jon, who took them both in his arms

“Y/N” He started but I gave him a look that made him go silent.

I reached the safety of my bedroom, feeling the urgent need to run away. Run away from him, from this house, from this country. Taking with me only the clothes on my body and my two little beasties...the immature part of me yelled ‘do it, do it’ but the grownup in me knows I can’t do this. It’s not fair to the kids, they barely get to see their father whom they love and miss so much. It’s not fair to Jon either, he loves those kids more than he’s own life.

But right now I needed my safe place (or better, person), I needed to breath so I called her and when I received the ok on spending 3 days at her house I packed a small little bag with enough close for just those days, as I was zipping up the bag a faint knock came from the bedroom door soon after being followed by it opening.

“Kitten, can we talk- What are you doing?” He asked in urgency as he bursts into the bedroom approaching me.

“I’m gonna go to Nancy’s” I vaguely said looking at anywhere but him

“Nance? Your sister?”

“She’s the only Nancy I know, so yeah..”

“But why? I just got home, I wanna be together Y/N”

“It’s just for 3 days Jon..you’ll be with the kids, they need you and they miss you” My voice is a faint whisper

“But I need and miss you too! I want you here! How am I supposed to enjoy my family if it’s not complete? I’m sure we can figure it out whatever it is that happened earlier” He grabbed my shoulders turning me to face him and cupped my cheeks, tilting my head up to look me in the eyes.

“Y/N, kitten, I know that I’ve said some pretty harsh things to you earlier. I’ve been stressed out. It’s all my fault, I’m so sorry cherry. Please forgive me baby” He pressed his forehead with mine

That was typical Jon, always pulling the guilt towards himself, he has a hard time understanding that he was not always the only cause of a disagreement.

“Jon, we both said some stupid things ok? This is not all on you, love” I released myself from him, if he continued this close I wouldn’t resist, and right now I need to think.

“Yes it is Y/N. Me and my stupid fucking mouth, not you. You’re perfect kitten”

I scoffed “Trust me, I am not”

“Yes you are! Look at who I am now because of you, I stopped doing drugs, I’m not a drinking mess anymore, I eagerly look forward coming come because I know that the three pieces of my heart are waiting for me, look at what I’ve achieved, what you gave me, how you gave up everything and everybody to be with me”

Oh yeah,that.. my ‘high society family’ was not happy at all when they met Jon, they said that we were a very dangerous combination of fire and gasoline, that we would never be happy. I had two options they said, either them or him. I hated my family and loved Jon so it was a simple math. I left my house and all of the luxury behind to live with him in his ridiculously small one bedroom old apartment. The only person that I still talked to was Nancy my older and just as rebel sister, who gave everybody the middle finger and left the not so humble abode of my family never speaking with them again. So it made sense that the two rebellious black sheeps would become their own family, mine was Nancy and I was hers.

“Jon I need some time to think, we need it ok? Please, we both need to digest what we’ve said to each other. It wasn’t just a simple ‘fuck off’ we’ve said some pretty bad stuff so let’s just process this ok?” I beg

“Are you gonna leave me forever? Please don’t tell me you’ll want divorce because of this...I won’t handle it kitten” His voice was strangled by tears

“Jon-” I was thankfully interrupted by Rosie’s and Atticus’ screams of joy on the hallway as they ran towards our bedroom

“Mommy, daddy the movie is about to start c’mon” Atticus says as he jumps from excitement. They have been wanting to watch Moana for a while now, but only when daddy got home so he could watch it too.

“We’re going buddy” Jon fastly said

“Actually” I begin “Only daddy will watch the movie with you” It crushed my heart to see the disappointment on their faces

“Why?” Rosie asks

“Because auntie Nancy called and mommy’s gonna need to go and help her”

“Is auntie Nana in trouble?” Now it was Atticus turn to ask

“No stinker, she just need momma’s help with something, it’s nothing bad I promise”

“Can you go to Nancy’s after the movie?” Jon hopefully asks, he knows that the longer I stay the less likely it will be for me to leave.

The kids gasped at their daddy’s amazingly smart idea.

“Please mommy, please!” The kids started to beg as they kneeled down to make their begging really serious.

Jon kneeled down too, by my side. I looked at him confused and he just said

“Yeah mommy, please stay” He placed his hands on my hips “Please kitten, don’t leave me” He whispered

And now I have 3 pairs of incredibly beautiful and pleading baby blue eyes staring at me waiting for my answer.

What am I supposed to do?...

To be continued (?)

What do you think? Should this story continue? Would you like to see what will Y/N do? What would you do? Please let me know your thoughts, they are so very important to me and help me with my writing 💕🥰

[kdramachitchat]

Yumi’s Cells Episode 2 Recap - Woong is finally introduced & goes on a blind date with Yumi

The cells booing when Ugi was taking so long to answer and when he finally said yes they all cheered! Ruby is shocked and Yumi seemed so relaxed looking forward to the fireworks, then enjoys her cup of coffee. She's in such a good mood!

Since this is a date, fashion cell is another cell and yet she's stuck at the Cell Town's prison. This is so dramatic! Cells that ruin Yumi gets locked up in prison for 2 years now.

The beginning of the fashion cell tragedy was the 1 piece dress Yumi planned on buying. The green dress looks good on Yumi but she has nowhere to go. Fashion cell made her go travel abroad so that she could wear the dress!

She also bought a pair of shoes to go with the dress but i doubt she was ever going to use them! She added pedi and got her hair permed just for the trip. Too much additional expense. No wonder.

Trip to Phuket caused additional expenses and it all began bec of the 70k won dress, oh my. She blew her salary away for 3 months. WHOA. Ok no wonder Fashion Cell was put in jail. Overspending.

Fashion Cell suggested a "effortless look" for Yumi's first date with Ugi. It's subtle makeup w/ a delicate touch. Her clothes are simple but was carefully matched together. Cells are not impressed, they say it's like her natural look. That's the point.

Ugi went ahead at the festival. He's at the flower garden area and Yumi hasn't left! Yumi asked how he'd knew her number and he said that he memorizes it. Oh. Cells are freaking out and its a green light for them. They're betting too on the results too.

Yumi arrived at the festival and Rubi called. Omg she's such a mood breaker, her name alone irritates you. Cells think she's calling to check up on the date & Yumi doesn't want to answer but had a bad feeling, she turned around and Rubi is there. Rubi wore a flowery dress and yet when the cells suggested for Yumi to wear one too they were pissed to find Rubi wearing one, you see fashion cell slowly trying escape. Yumi arrived and is in a hurry to go the other way with Ugi so that they won't catch Rubi. She doesn't want to go back & took a taxi to eat a famous Ilsan restaurant. Rubi keeps calling her. Can she take a hint? She don't want to see you.

Ugi at the resto asked Yumi what kind of guy she likes and she answered that she doesnt know. Ugi says that he's always been curious about her and her personal preferences. OMG. Ugi asked her if she's willing to go on a blind date. The heart balloon popped and it started to rain on the cell world like Yumi's mood. Ugi wanted to introduce her to someone. This is a 1-sided love. The friend lives in Ilsan. She's down. Yumi asked him why her out of all people & Ugi tells her that she has a great personality and that she's pretty. Love Cell doesn't believe his words. Yumi repeat what Love Cell said that he should've dated her instead. Ugi likes someone else. Yumi is totally crushed at this time and you just want to give her a hug. The cell town now is covered in flood and love cell is idle about to be covered by the ocean. Yumi asked the person who Ugi's interested in. Ugi tells her that he's not into woman & asks her if she could keep his secret. He thinks that she's trustworthy & that make her happy. She then agrees for the blind date. Ugi also tells her that he memorizes # quickly & started crying! Flood continues.

Saeyi and Woong are introduced! Saeyi answered Ugi's phone call on Woong's phone. I'm too excited seeing Bohyun as Woong! Ugi called him abt the blind date. Woong mentioned it, Saeyi and Louis turned around. He knows it's Yumi & they're the same age. Saeyi talks about the misconception of women who date around Yumi's age. She tells Woong that women date to get married and advice him to take the date lightly. Saeyi tells him to take her out for tea & Woong disagrees. Determined to do what he wants.

Then at cell land, white blood cells reporting the cells missing. Saying this is the worst flood they ever had in 3 yrs. Love Cell and True Feelings Cells are stuck together in a island. Love Cell looks so down bec she keeps disappointing Yumi.

Yumi's at work even on Sundays. Chief Nam decided to take his 2 co-workers for lunch. Yet, Yumi looks so down & bailed on the outing, tells them that she has plans. Chief noticed that she looks mad. At Cell land, the facial expression meter is broken! The cells are worried that she'll have the same expression with her first blind date with Woong. Emotion Cell thinks of the possibility that Yumi might cancel on Woong & what would Ugi think. So frustrated on her rushing things when it comes to love. The mechanic cell suggested cell dolls that reacts automatically. The doll reacts according to the situation. I wonder if this will ever work out. I have a feeling it's not going to end well. Emotion cell & another cell gave it a go. Chief Nam and her coworker are surprised that she really is going on a blind-date and wished her good luck. Yumi's mood instantly changed from her previous dampened mood. So i guess it works. Its better than looking down like the cell suggested. There's side effects though on the cell doll...overreacting and pretentiousness. Oh no. Who else is nervous with this blind date of Yumi and Woong? The cells started to worry too but still willing to use the doll.

Woong is about to leave & we finally get to see him in the famous Space Rabbit outfit! Woong tells Saeyi that he's going on a blind date. Saeyi doesnt approve on what he's wearing.

Flashback, Woong finds Saeyi odd & has many diff instances. Woong's used to it and thinks its just the way she is. Woong & Ugi hanging out. Ugi tells him that Saeyi thinks he's a pushover & talks to him about Yumi. Woong isnt into blind dates.

Their meetup place is at the Bonjour Fountain and Woong is early! Woong decides to tune in for some music, looks quite engrossed on his phone when Yumi arrives & Woong didnt notice her arrival. Until he did! OMG. Woong had the "love at first sight" look to Yumi. Can't wait for their date! You think Yumi's the only one who got cells? Woong got cells too! Woong's got cells though lack of that is...Yumi's cells are not impressed at least fashion cell is. The rest of the cells dont like him & didnt want to be rude so they used the reaction doll. Woong is just lost for words. This is so embarrassing. Date hasnt started & its not going well. Woong acts lost & dumb then he bumped his head. Oh dear me. Yumi looks so shocked. We don't know what's wrong with him either. Yumi's cells thinks he's an idiot. Humor Cell appears. NO. Woong made a dad joke. I died. Im not suppose to laugh at the joke but the joke is so embarrassing you can't help but do!

Then the episode ends with the awkward lame jokes at the cafe. I wonder how this date will turn out.

[whumpinggrounds]

Hey, Jamie

if u don’t remember jamie from the febuwhump drabbles that is so okay but she is deeply important. also i hope this isn’t too wildly confusing lol

tagging @shapeshiftersandfire and @killtheprotagonist ! let me know if you want to be added or removed :)

CW: pet whump, lady whump, i mean hardly but it’s built into the story. aftermath of conditioning, angst, crying, grief, reluctant whumper/incompetent caretaker (sorry Mara but it’s true)

She’s waited long enough. Probably too long, really. It’s been two weeks of trying to get Isabella settled, but now Mara is running out of reasons not to call Jamie. Besides, of course, the fact that she just really doesn’t want to call Jamie. It was hard enough talking to Violet about it, and Violet likes Mara. Jamie will be…Jamie will be a whole other story.

It’s too much to hope that Mara will never see Jamie again. It’s too much to hope that word never gets back. The best thing for Mara to do is be firm and direct and, and…

Goddammit. She just needs to call. She just needs to say it. Without giving herself time to balk, Mara scoops her phone off the couch and finds Jamie’s contact.

Well. The phone is ringing. She can’t exactly back out now. In the other room, she can hear Isabella padding around the kitchen, water splashing as she washes dishes. In her ear, the phone rings once, twice, three times.

And then Jamie picks up.

“Mara?” Right off the bat her voice is eager, almost excited. There’s only one reason for Mara to be calling, and both of them know it. “Have you – have you heard – I mean, did you find…?” A deep breath down the line. “Do you know who…where she ended up?”

Stifling a sigh, Mara resigns herself to what is going to be a hard, horrible conversation. “So…yeah, I know who has her-”

“Who? Where?”

Gritting her teeth, Mara scrubs a hand across her face. “I…just let me talk, okay? Just let me…just let me explain.” An inhale, as if Jamie’s about to talk again, and then she must think better of it, because there’s silence. “There…there was an incident during training, and WRU was going to…they wanted to keep Jude. They call them maintenance workers. People…pets, I guess, who work at the facilities.”

Another pause, and then Jamie’s uncertain voice. “O-okay. Is, um. Is that…where she is?”

“No.” She could keep on hedging, working her way up to it, but eventually, Mara has to say it. She might as well just say it now. “I…they let me take her. Instead.”

Quiet. All she can hear is Jamie breathing. “You…you…have her?” For now, there’s no anger, just confusion. That’s good.

“Yeah. Yeah, um, they…gave her to me. It’s gross. But I don’t know.” Mara sighs. “At least I know she’s safe.”

“Yeah.” Jamie still sounds stunned, and then she starts talking fast, all in a rush, like if she gets the words out fast enough, they have to come true. “Yeah that’s…I mean, you can let her go, right? You’re going to let her go, now. She can start to recover-”

“No.”

“N-no?”

“No.” Mara purses her lips, wishes Jamie weren’t so dense. “They…I work for WRU, Jamie. I can’t just…get rid of my brand-new pet.”

“But she’s not a pet.” Jamie’s voice is a confused, lost whisper. “She’s Jude.”

“Not anymore.” Mara’s voice is harsh, but she doesn’t have the patience to make it any other way. “She’s…look, Jamie, she’s different now. Everything is different. I can’t just…” she shakes her head, even though Jamie can’t see. “WRU gave her to me. They want me to…they have this program they want me to try…she’s mine but it’s like, a conditional thing. I can’t let her go, okay?” That’s the end of it, after all. “I can’t just let her go. It would be suspicious. It would get me investigated; it would get her seized.”

“But…but…” Jamie sounds like a confused child, and it’s driving Mara nuts. “But you can’t…keep her as a pet-”

“I have to, Jamie. There’s…I don’t have another choice. She’s safer this way, and it’s a lot easier on her.”

“But, but-”

“No buts, okay?” Mara makes her voice firm. Being kind isn’t going to work if she doesn’t want Jamie arguing with her. “This is just…this is just how it has to be. For now,” Mara adds, finally, when the stunned silence down the line becomes too much. “When I can quit WRU, when Isabella and I can move away…” Another sigh. “But for right now…this is the best option she has.”

“Is…Isabella?”

“That’s her name, now.”

“Her-her name? Why does she have a new-”

“Her old one hurts her, Jamie. Whatever they did to her, it hurts her just hearing it.”

A low gasp, like the air is being punched out of her lungs. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Mara waits for Jamie to talk, waits three whole minutes. With anyone else, she’d assume the call had dropped, but Jamie can be like that. Finally, there’s the sound of Jamie clearing her throat with no small difficulty. “Can I, um…” Jamie’s voice fades. It’s low, raspy, trembling just a little. “Can I see her?”

Mouth falling open, Mara wonders what the hell to say to that. “You don’t…live here, Jamie. And she’s not…she’s not Jude anymore. She has a new name, she acts different, and she’s not going to have any idea who you are. Things are different. Everything is different, you can’t show up here and…save her.”

A raggedy breath down the line, and Mara hopes to god she doesn’t have to listen to Jamie crying. “Can I just…if I make it out there sometime, please, can I just see her?”

Letting her head fall back and her eyes flutter shut, Mara lets her sigh whistle out through her nose. This conversation has drained her too much for her to be able to argue. “Sure,” she tells Jamie resignedly. When is Jamie, on her caregiver’s salary, going to be able to make it out here just to see Jude? It’s a nothing promise. It’s something to placate Jamie. “Fine. Yeah, you can see her.”

“Okay.” Jamie takes a deep, teary breath. “Okay.”

_

The woman in front of Isabella has a funny look on her face. It’s a smile, but shaky, her mouth trembling. She looks happy, but she also looks really sad. Isabella keeps her eyes respectfully lowered, but then Mara nudges her with an elbow, reminding her that her owner likes her to look people in the eyes. The nudge is a little harder than it needs to be, but then, Mara’s tense. The words she exchanged on the phone were not happy, and Isabella doesn’t need to look at her owner to know that Mara’s eyes are narrowed, her jaw is tight. She was glaring when she opened the door, glaring so much that the woman coming in looked uncomfortable.

She still came in, though. She still came in, and now she’s here, doing her best to smile at Isabella while Mara glares.

Mara’s glare doesn’t seem to bother her anymore. The woman’s too busy looking at Isabella, her eyes bright, icy blue, and watery, like she’s about to cry. Her face is pale and narrow and framed by the brightest red hair Isabella’s ever seen. She looks happy, and dazzled, and nervous. She looks like she’s holding her breath. The sight of her makes Isabella’s breath hitch, makes Isabella’s familiar old headache rage back to life, makes Isabella want to stretch her shoulders. There’s something hurt just behind her eyes, some pulsing fuzzy vision that refuses to come to light.

Isabella smiles at this stranger, keeping her face open, gentle. She’s trained, after all, to put people at ease, even people her owner doesn’t like. “Hello. My name is Isabella.”

“Hi, Isabella.” The woman’s voice is raspy, a little shaky, to match her smile. “My name is Jamie. It’s, um. It’s really nice to meet you.”

[weasleyslag]

i’m not coming home | p.w

summary: A collection of letters between Percy and his girlfriend Penelope Clearwater following his estrangement from his family.

pairing(s): Percy Weasley/Penelope Clearwater

wc: 6.2k (lol I’m sorry)

warning(s): heavy cursing, hella toxic relationship, no happy ending

ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30644294

Dear Percy,

See, I told you I would write! I really am so proud of you and your new job. I hope you’ll allow me to come visit your new apartment soon. I know you’re very busy, but maybe not too busy for me? My dad told me he’d pay for my stay in London if you invited me, but I think it’d be more fun for me to stay with you and go to a show or something. I heard there’s some good muggle performances down there, I’d be interested to see that sort of thing. It’d be an good change, I’m up to my head with wizards that think they’re so talented. 

Please tell me all you can about your job when you write back! I know it must be super under wraps, being the Junior Assistant to Fudge himself, but I would be interested in knowing the most mundane of things you can tell me, it would most certainly be more enthralling than the highlight of any of my days. I was hoping I’d be promoted to something more dignified by now, but they’ve still got me watching over some of the Ministry workers’ children. You know I like kids, but I’d rather not be a glorified babysitter. There’s not even many learning activities I can do with them, I’m pretty much instructed to do puppet shows and other silly tasks for them all day. Hopefully someone recognizes my potential soon. Maybe since you work with Fudge now, you can say something to him??? 

I hate to turn this letter sour but Fred and George have gotten into contact with me this week. They’re really worried about you. They said that they’ve all written to you and the letters are always sent back, unopened. You must know this hurts them, why don’t you at least read the letters? You know they love you and I know that you really are kind at heart; you must still have love for them. I know it must have been hard for you to hear that after all your efforts, your dad doesn’t believe you’re capable of receiving such a prestigious job on your own merits. But of course they are all paranoid, what with all that happened last Spring. I hope you can find it within yourself to be the bigger person and reconcile with your family. Maybe they’ve even apologized in their letters, you’ll never know unless you read them. Don’t read Fred’s though, he’s more mad than the rest of them. I’m sure he’s thrown every name in the book at you.

I hope my next letter will be in better spirits. I hope Hermes is doing well and I hope even more so that you will adjust to life in London well.

With Love, 

Penelope 

Dear Penelope,

I cannot express with words how excited I was to receive your owl. I hope you don’t mind that I kept her for a few days, Hermes adores her and she reminds me of you. However, I also had to keep her back because it took quite some time to give you an adequate response to everything you said in your letter.

Hermes and I are well. He hasn’t adjusted as well as I have, but I understand. The air is polluted and there’s not much room for him to roam. There’s no forests in sight, only a bunch of buildings. If I wasn’t taking your letters, I would send him back to the Burrow. He was happier there and besides, the ministry has provided me a new owl for business letters.

I, on the other hand, am doing the best I ever have been. I am extremely efficient with my work and I appear to be pleasing my superiors. In my off time, I watch live shows and read. I have been getting into some Muggle classics, like War and Peace. Their culture is quite interesting, although ours is clearly superior. I am glad I am nourishing my mind as much as I can, I only wish there wasn’t so much noise outside my apartment. Jackhammers and traffic is all l I hear all day. It gets old fast. I’m not sure if you would like it here, but I would be happy to have you if you wish to visit. Although, I thought about your proposal to stay with me and I must decline. I would love to and I am sure my hormones would have a field day, but your father wants you to stay somewhere else and merely visit me during the day, trying to trick him would be wrong. I am sorry, but rules are rules, even when it comes to you.

I will speak with Fudge about your employment. I am a bit nervous to do so but I think he likes me, so I will certainly try. You’re a very smart girl and I believe if they just took notice of how you applied yourself, they’d move you up the ranks swiftly. It would be a shame to let such an academic be reduced to a daycare worker. That seems like something my mum would do if she worked. And you certainly surpass her when it comes to brains and ambition. 

Dismayed is an understatement for how I feel knowing that my family has taken advantage of our relationship to try to shake me. I do not wish to speak to them now, I will only speak to them when they realize that I am right, which I hope won’t be much longer. You’re right, of course, I do have love for them, even Fred and George, but I can not continue a relationship with people that discount my accomplishments and constantly laugh at my expense. Reading their letters is pointless. I read the first letter I received from Charlie and although he tried to be eloquent, he still wasn’t seeing things my way. He was basically just regurgitating everything my dad had said, just in a kinder way. He and Bill have always been the most sensible so I see no point in attempting to read the other letters, they will only be worse versions of Charlie’s. I will admit that curiosity got the better of me, however. A letter from Fred came in the same day as yours. You were right, it was awful. I shouldn’t have expected anything more, however, that boy is barely literate. Here is a snippet of his abomination of a letter (I have fixed the spelling mistakes, there’s no reason to subject you to that):

“You are a massive cunt, you know that? After all mum and dad have done for you. Seriously?  I can’t even call you a prat anymore, that’s just an insult to prat’s. You’re a slag for Fudge and we all know it. If you wanted to give him a good rimming, you could have just said so instead of causing us all this grief. Well not me, I don’t give one fuck about you. You could be in a ditch tomorrow for all I care. And maybe you will be, Fudge and his friends would just as well see you there as in an office. How could you choose him over your own mother? I hope you’re happy that you make her cry every night. I hear that you get paid three times dad’s salary and you have sent home not one knut. But twats like you don’t care about their family, huh? Enjoy your cushy apartment, I hope when you open the windows, a pigeon flies in and takes a shit on your head.”

Isn’t it just terrible? And it’s all one huge paragraph too, with unbearably non-flowy sentences. He is a right idiot if he thinks I’d ever want to respond to that. And why would I want to send money to people who treat me like that, anyway? I can’t put myself into his pea brain so I guess I will never know. Please make me take your advice next time so that I won’t have to subject myself to that kind of torture.

As for what happened this Spring, I’d rather not talk about it. The Ministry says that you-know-who is not back, so I’m afraid Harry must have been lying. Perhaps he had a fever and hallucinated the whole thing. I don’t hate him, by the way. I know my family must be trying to convince you of that but it is just not true. I think he is foolish and many adults are using him as a pawn. It’s sad, really. My family has gotten so desperate that they made Hermione and Harry write me letters too. I had already been informed by Fudge himself to turn over any correspondence from Harry, so of course I did that. I do wish I had the forethought to read the letter first, I’m very curious about it now, but oh well.

I care for you very much and hope we can arrange a visit soon.

With Even More Love,

 Percy

Dear Percy, 

I was hoping this letter would be more positive than the ones we have exchanged lately and that perhaps we could even arrange my trips to London, but I have gotten some terrible news. And I will not believe it until you confirm it.

There is a nasty rumour going around that you are to be court scribe for the Wizengamot in Harry’s trial. Say it isn’t true, Percy! I know it’s such an honor to work so closely with the Wizengamot, you’d be the youngest person in all of history to work as a scribe for them. But at what cost? Harry is your friend. I’ve been spending more and more time with your family and I consider Harry to be a friend now, too. I know the details of the case, and I’m sure you must since you’re apparently working it. Even if you don’t care for him, you must understand that objectively, Harry is in the right, at least morally. He was saving his cousin. The cousin that he grew up with and besides the kid being an absolute terror, he was basically his brother. Wouldn’t you cast magic to save your brothers or sister? How can you work for a case like that when you know you’d do the same as Harry?

I love you, I really do, and that’s why this breaks my heart so much. You’re turning into something that you aren’t for the sake of ambition. Please don’t do this. Come home and if Fudge truly does value you as much as you think, he will continue working with you even after you are on good terms with your family again. You must be missing them, aren’t you?

I will have to postpone the trip to London until you get all this figured out. I hope you understand. I am always open for you to come back here to visit me. We could all meet for dinner at the Burrow, where you belong.

I don’t have much else to say. I’m scared about what’s happening in the world and I’m nervous for you. I miss you, but I’m not sure if the you I miss is still you.

P.S: Tell Hermes I love him.

xxxx,

Penelope 

Dear Penelope, 

You have heard right, at least about the Wizengamot. I beg of you not to let my family poison your mind. Clearly, they want everyone to think I’m a terrible person. If they had it their way, we wouldn’t even be together right now. It’s not their fault, really, they suffer from cognitive dissonance, but they only think with their heart. That’s not sustainable and most certainly not how the world works. The court specifically wants me to be scribe and like you acknowledged, that is a huge honor. This is really going to help me get ahead even further. You know I have big dreams. I’d like to be the Minister one day and having all this under my belt would be a big help.

I really am not allowed to be discussing the case with the public, but I suppose I will make a tiny exception for you. I can’t help but have a soft spot for you; I musn’t make bending the rules for you a habit. You’re lucky I’m even physically able to say anything. The Ministry is heavily monitoring all the mail that comes in and out from high ranking members, but they haven’t done that with me yet (as far as I know, at least). I guess it must be because I’ve been so loyal and I won’t even receive my family’s letters, so they trust me. Little do they know that I have a weakness for you. 

As of right now, I’m not too worried about Harry (of course, they might change when court is in session and I get all the details). I think his case makes sense. I’ve poured through court cases similar to this one, although the defendants were never as much of a public figurehead as Harry (but that shouldn’t matter, the Wizengamot is totally unbiased and will not take Harry’s fame into account when deciding a verdict), and every court case similar to this ended in a not guilty verdict. I am not sitting as a court scribe to try to lock Harry away, it’s just my job. I don’t approve of him, but let’s not pretend like I never want him to see the light of day again. Anyway, I was surprised that someone that possesses your caliber of intelligence relied so hard on pathos to convince me that being a court scribe is wrong. Everyone knows emotion is a flimsy argument and certainly has no place in the courtroom. The fact that he saved a muggle’s life will definitely be brought up in court, but it won’t be because it’s someone he cares for. It’ll be because we have all sorts of laws about self defense and protecting each other, even a few about protecting muggles. I fear you might not have a place high up in the ministry if you continue preferring pathos to logos. And anyway, you trying to my emotion by bringing up my family makes no sense. My family are wizards, so if it came down to it, I could protect them and it wouldn’t be against the law. It’s not my fault that my family is better than those Dursley’s. 

I really must beg of you to stay away from my family and especially from Harry. That will probably not end well for you. Do not mistake that for a threat, I’d never hurt you, but I’m being realistic. Harry is off the rails and my family blindly believes him. In my opinion, Harry needs to be in a mental hospital, not roaming around as a public figure where everyone hangs on to his every word. He clearly suffers from PTSD after all he went through as a child between his parents being murdered in front him, a very powerful dark wizard trying to to murder him, and the muggle abuse he endured. And that’s not even mentioning all the pressure the world, especially Dumbledore, has put on him. He’s not a bad guy, he’s just insane. If the adults around him cared as much as they say they do, they’d put him away for a while until he can heal. But they won’t, that’s the problem. And now I hear that little Ginny is in love with him. I have never in my life been so in despair. I can’t help but think how bleak her future will be. Maybe I should write a letter to her. I doubt she’ll listen, but I do need to try. 

I really do hope you decide to come visit me. Maybe I can speak with your father and come to an honest agreement about you living with me soon enough. I am really lonely here and I’ve been thinking a lot about the future. It seems my family and I will never get along again and I have no one else besides you. I have all this extra income so I think it might be practical for me to marry you. Then, you wouldn’t have to hear all this rubbish from my family in order to feel close with me. I will speak with him about it soon. It’s not really all that bad here and even if you’re not good enough to have a real job in the Ministry, that’s okay. I make enough money and I do want a lot of kids anyway. It wouldn’t be practical for you to have a demanding long term job.

Love, 

Percy

Percy, 

Maybe I am a sensitive fool but I found much of your letter to be highly offensive. You essentially called me unintelligent throughout the letter, then didn’t ask but rather told me that you would be marrying me (only caring about what my father would say, not me). And to top it all off, you told me I was to be your personal incubator while you get to have an actual job. It’s insulting, really. What if I don’t want to do that, did you even consider that? I care for you and I believe I always will but I am not in a place right now where I fancy marrying you. I think I’d rather tie the knot with one of twins or Charlie. Besides, I felt unsettling how you alluded to muggles being lesser beings. They most certainly are not, they’re just different than us. I don’t know how I can be with someone that sees a whole group of people as lesser than them.

I must not have too much respect for myself. After all, I felt all those things that I wrote in the first paragraph, yet I’m still writing to you. What terrible damage love can have to the brain. I think I know how this whole thing will turn out, yet I still hope against my better judgement that we will end up together. I will try to put this past me if you can promise to not be so cruel.

Things are the same as always in my life. Spending most of the time with Mother and Father and the rest tending to children. I think I might die of boredom. I have been thinking about becoming a Hogwarts teacher, at least it would be less degrading than playing babysitter for a bunch of toddlers. Curiously enough, I received a letter from Snape about receiving a position, not Flitwick. He liked me well enough back in school, but I definitely didn’t think he would ever think about contacting me for a teaching role. I didn’t think he ever thought much about any student that wasn’t a Slytherin. I think maybe he sees himself in me. You know I was treated pretty horribly throughout school and something tells me he might have gone through a similar experience. That aside, however, he wrote me a letter requesting my presence to a meeting in a few weeks. It’s a meeting with all the current teachers, so I’m quite nervous about it. They want to speak with me about a new class, I think, it wasn’t any sort of curriculum I was familiar with. Still, I’m heavily considering it. It would be a big step up. I am a little worried about moving out there, but I think I’ll be alright. 

I know you act like you don’t care about how your family is doing, but that’s all it is, an act. So I will at least tell you the good parts. I’m sure you’ve seen by the addresses of the letters that they’re still sending you (because they care), they have moved. The Order has been restored, we’d all love to have you there, although I don’t have much hope that you would consider joining. Even Charlie and Bill have come back and joined. They miss you and I think they’re more than a little disappointed. Ginny is dating a kid named Michael Corner, not Harry. I’m sure you’re over the moon about that. Ron and Hermione have become prefects. That’s really good news, yeah? I’m not quite sure how Ron snagged it, but he did.

I promised myself I wouldn’t talk about any more conflict with you, so I won’t even bring up what you said at Harry’s trial. Just know I’m disappointed. What, I will say, however, is that it was so cruel that you didn’t even speak with your own father once court ended. I know you knew he was there. Look, I have a really bad feeling about the future and I can’t help but fear that something bad is going to happen and you’re going to regret being such an ass to them. 

This letter was all over the place, I apologize. I just have all these emotions and you don’t seem to understand. Or if you do understand, you don’t care. I don’t know which is worse.

Take care,

Penelope

Dear Penelope, 

I apologize for my behavior in my last letter. You’re right, I was only thinking of myself. I’ve just been by myself so much that I guess I find it hard to think about what other people want. I hope you can forgive me. Truly though, I think we could reconcile easier if you met me out in London. Of course only corresponding through letters has led to a strain. 

Please brace yourself, because I know if you do not prepare for what I’m about to tell you, you will be very mad at me. I consulted with Fudge and we have decided that you shouldn’t become a teacher at Hogwarts. It’s not a good look for me and it’s safe for you. Dumbledore is off his rocker, I’m not going to allow you to be put in harm's way. Fudge has sent a letter to Hogwarts, strongly suggesting that they find a new candidate for their position. I agree that the role is important, kids need to learn, and you would have been a great teacher. But it’s not the right time for you. I know you will probably be royally pissed for a while, but you’ll get over it. I did it for your own good. I hope you will be happy to hear that I have talked to Fudge about you having a proper job in the Ministry and he agrees. He will be writing to you with an offer soon enough. All’s well that ends well, you get a safer, higher paying job. And you can be near me!

Yes, I knew that my family had moved. I hope they move back soon, it’s not safe for them there. You’re right, someone is going to get hurt. I can feel it in my bones. And of course I will be utterly inconsolable, but it will not be my fault if something happens. It will be Dumbledore’s and inadvertently, Harry’s. I would love to give my family advice, but I know they will not listen. Therefore, there’s no point in writing letters. Besides, even if I did want to write to them, I think Fudge would catch on and have someone start monitoring my mail. I trust the Ministry completely, but I still find it’s in my family’s best interests if the Ministry doesn’t know their exact going on’s.

I heard Ron became prefect. I’m very proud. I wrote him a letter, which the Ministry read (and unfortunately a few unkind edits to, but I’m sure it was for good reason), congratulating him. Unfortunately, I don’t think he’s received it. He hasn’t written back. Maybe Dumbledore has started screening letters? I’m proud of Hermione too, although I didn’t write her a letter. You seem to speak with the lot of them often, so please send her my congratulations. She’s such a smart and sweet girl, she’s a good match for Ron (I can tell he likes her). I would have preferred a Pureblood but oh well, she’s better than most muggles. Oh and speaking of people dating, yes I am very pleased that Ginny has found a nice guy that’s not Harry. 

Love, 

Percy

Percy, 

Before I write anything else, I must address your hilarious claim that Dumbledore is monitoring letters. Ron got your letter, read it, then proceeded to burn it. He found it very offensive. He’s not happy with you, so maybe don’t send him more letters.

Fred and George are still mad, more than everyone else. George invited me out last week, I think only because he knew it would get a rise out of you. Fred’s the maddest of them all, as you know so well from his letters, but he’s with Angelina Johnson, so he couldn’t take me on the “jealousy date”. I don’t really fancy George, don’t worry, and I don’t think he fancies me. I must admit, however, that it was a nice time. It was a welcome change to listen to someone talk to me about their interests instead of being obsessed with a job. It was even more welcome that he asked me questions back and seemed to actually care about my responses. My favorite thing, though, was going out with someone that cared so much for their family. Someone that not only understood romantic love, but also platonic and familial love. I’d been missing that part of you for a while. But like I said, I don’t fancy him. I didn’t even let him kiss me. I feel guilty about it all, of course, I’d like to come down to London and try to get things in our relationship to run smoothly again. 

Also, yes, I am very upset that you had that letter written to Hogwarts. You totally crossed a line and if I had any balls, I would have broken up with you over it. But alas, I really do want to make it work. This is another thing that I think we need to work on together. In London. Please tell me your thoughts.

With care,

 Penelope

Dear Penelope,

Literally, what the fuck? I saw red when I read your letter. You. Went. Out. On. A. Date. With. My. Brother? And the little traitor tried to kiss you? I had half a mind to challenge him to a duel. But you’re right, he’s just trying to get me to act out and he will not get that out of me. There are so many problems with our relationship right now and I cannot bear to let you go, so we must meet and work things out immediately. And I’m not coming home, so you must come here. I’ve taken a week off at the Ministry, please arrive here as soon as you receive this letter. I will not be bested by the likes of George Weasley and a few other misunderstandings I may have thrown your way. 

No need to write back,

Percy

Dear Percy, 

I am so glad we had that meeting in London! I really do feel like we’ve fixed things. It makes me so happy that you have agreed not to be so unkind with your words in the future. And as promised, I have decreased contact with your family and all the other members of the Order. George has written me about a dozen letters since then, checking up on me and filling me in on what’s going on with your family. But as promised, I have not written back. If I expect you to uphold your part of the agreement, I must hold myself to the same standard.

I think I will take that secretary job Fudge offered me. It’s not all that you made it out to be, but at least I can be near you. I’m still too wary to marry you, after all it hasn’t been too long since we were falling apart, but I think it would be nice to be physically closer to you. I’ll see what I can do in terms of flats, since you’re too prudish to lend me room in yours.

Love you lots,

Penelope

Dear Penelope,

I don’t have much time to write at the moment, I’m very busy, so please excuse the short letter. I, too, am glad we are doing better. It was impacting my efficiency at work and I could not have that. I’m just glad there’s no more Fred and George, they were trying to hijack your mind and make it theirs. Besides, I have heard from more than one female that has come into contact with them, that they are basically a pair of incubi. I know you think I’m dramatic when I say that, but those two boys have turned evil, I know it. I should have seen the clear signs. It was so obvious from the time that they were little boys, chasing poor Ron with spiders.

Thank Godric that you are coming to join me at the Ministry! I can keep a close eye on you there, make sure you’re safe. I know the job isn’t glorious, but not everyone is as fortunate as me. You have to work your way up. I know you’ll have a very important job in no time. And I never said I wouldn’t let you live with me by the way, I said that I didn’t want your father to become cross with me. You really shouldn’t call me a prude, or do you not remember what all went in London when you came to visit? I didn’t think it was quite that forgettable, but I’ll just have to remind you when you move here.

Love, 

Percy

Dear Percy,

I’m sorry for the distance between letters. I meant to write, I really did, but everything went to shit here. I know I said I would distance myself from your family, but George wrote to me and said that your father is in the hospital. So now I’m back to semi-living with them. Did you not read your mother’s letter about it, Percy? She marked it “urgent” on the envelope. Your father was utterly distressed that you didn’t even write, much less visit him. It made his recovery harder and longer. Don’t you still care even a little bit? What if he had passed, wouldn’t you have felt so guilty?

Also, your mother collapsed and fell into a fit of tears when you sent your Christmas jumper back. Why didn’t you just keep it? It would have spared her feelings, even if you think you’re too good for the sweaters now. She made me a sweater, I loved it. But oh well, please think about the repercussions of your actions on others. You’re making it very hard on all of us. Also, Fred wants me to let you know that he wants to bring back drawing and quartering just for you. George is more straight to the point, vowing to castrate you if you two ever cross paths again (by the way, they both thought your incubus comment was very funny, I think it inflated their ego).

I know you are on the Ministry’s side, saying that Voldemort is NOT back, which is horseshit and you know it. But you do know who attacked your father, yes? Surely that should be enough proof for you. You’re very smart, why are you letting an institution think for you?

With peace and love,

Penelope

Dear Penelope, 

I am slightly dismayed that you didn’t keep up with your end of our agreement, going back to speak with my family. I do understand, though, my father’s attack was a shock and could have ended tragically. I know he’s better now, though, so please cease contact again. 

On a similar note, yes, I did read Mum’s letter and know that he was in the hospital. I sent flowers anonymously, if that means anything to you. And I kept tabs on him from the Ministry. If I felt that things were going downhill and he wasn’t going to make it, I would have visited. But he was fine, so it’s not a big deal. Maybe he will learn to not poke his head where it doesn’t need poking from now on.

As for the sweater, it’s not that I didn’t want to keep it. I love her sweaters, I wear some of the old one sometimes. But keeping the sweater would have sent a completely wrong message and given her false hope. So really, sending it back was a selfless act.

I know you want me to say that You-Know-Who is back. But you just don’t understand. I represent the Ministry now. What they say goes. That doesn’t mean I don’t have my own thoughts, it simply means that I stand with them.

Just wanted to remind you that you’re very beautiful and I miss your kind heart. I can’t wait for you to move here.

Love,

Percy

Percy,

I am most certainly NOT moving to be with you in London after the stunt you pulled. Betraying Dumbledore and holding Harry in place whilst being questioned by Fudge? What a dick move. I don’t know what I expected, you provided me all the warning signs. I guess that when it mattered, you’d do the right thing. Now I see how wrong I was. I need some time to myself, and you need to think over in your heart why you thought it was okay to do what you did. You just better be glad that Fudge sent you out before you got smacked the fuck up by Dumbledore.

From the top of my head to the bottom of my toes, fuck you

Penelope

Dear Penelope, 

This is the fifth letter I’ve sent to you in a row with no response, please answer. I know I shouldn’t have done what I did and I’m sorry. I’m embarrassed, really I am, but I’ve dug myself too deep. I miss you, I miss Ginny, I miss Charlie, I miss Bill, I miss Ron, I miss Mum and Dad. I even miss Fred and George. But it’s too late. I wish I had seen it before. They were right, you were right. I can’t let them know that. I feel so ashamed. I want to help them, but I also want to never bother them again. I saw You-Know-Who in the Ministry. I know all along that he was back, but I kept denying it for my job. But now I don’t have my family and I don’t have you, so my job is all I have. Please know that anything you see from me from this moment forward doesn’t represent my heart. You’re right, I don’t remember how many letters ago it was, but you said I wasn’t the person you fell in love with. You couldn’t have hit the nail on the head any better. There’s barely any left of that Percy, just his shell. So really, I shouldn’t be talking to you at all. I’m not the person you committed to. But I still love you. It’s total wishful thinking that I can have you back, but hoping is the only thing that keeps me from going insane. Bill wrote me a letter saying that he was engaged. I don’t want to face my family but I’ll go if I can see you.

Love, Percy

Percy, 

I felt like I should write you one last letter because despite myself, I still care. I want to give you closure. It’s clear to me that you’re never coming home, which is clear symbolism that you are never going to do the right thing. You said it yourself in your letters, you’re digging your heels in and standing by the ministry. You’re a filthy coward. 

Yes, Bill is getting married in a few months. We’re all very busy with preparations, it seems like that’s the only good thing that’s happening around here. You have an invitation, of course, but you shouldn’t come if you just want to see me. If I see you, I will make a scene and there will be more than just mashed parsnips being thrown at you (yes, Fred and George told me about how you visited just for the benefit of the Ministry. It’s pathetic, really). Your mum is convinced you will show up to the wedding and everything will be magically better. I know you better than that. I wish I was in blissful ignorance and thought you still loved us all, but you don’t. You’re not going to be able to get your head out of your ass until it’s one of us that’s laying lifeless somewhere because of the monsters of people that the Ministry have allowed to roam for so long. I know where you stand and you know where I stand. So there’s nothing else to say.

I’m sending back all the things of yours that I have. You should receive them all with this letter. Please write back if I missed anything.

Sincerely, 

Penelope Clearwater

[ikeromantic]

A Kasugayama Christmas Carol

I think this is what happens when you’re playing ikesen on your phone and watching A Christmas Carol. I have no other excuse. This bit of holiday fluff is 3700 words (yes. omg)

Starring: 

Kenshin Uesugi as The Scrooge

MC as ‘the assistant’ or Cratchit

Shingen Takeda as Tiny ‘Tim’

Yukimura Saneda as Nephew ‘Fred’

and Sasuke as all Ghosts 

Kenshin did not like celebrations. They were a waste of time. Efforts could be better spent on war: preparing for war, training for battle, making swords and armor, building walls . . . And yet, every year in the dead of winter his assistant always wanted to celebrate. “It’s a holiday,” she would whine and ask for time off. Try to decorate. Make fancy food. What a waste.

This year, he decided it was enough. This year, no one would have a good time. Scrooge them, he thought. So he was ready when the girl from the future waltzed into his office, hands full of ribbons and origami stars. 

“You will get those out of my sight,” Kenshin ordered. His mismatched eyes were small and cold, and very cruel.

His assistant winced. “But Kenshin - can’t we have just a little celebration? I’ll even bring you some pickled plums and special sake.”

She was good, he thought. Tempting him like this. “That sounds - wait, no! You get back to your desk and work on those intelligence reports. I want to know who we’re fighting in the spring. How many warriors I’ll need to muster. How many swords . . .” Just thinking about the coming battles made him feel a little better.

It didn’t seem to make the girl any happier, but Kenshin didn’t feel at all responsible for her joy. She could cheer up and do her work, or do her work with a frown. 

Her head dropped, the smile falling from her face. The expression of pure disappointment almost made Kenshin change his mind - afterall, would it hurt so much to have a bit of cheer in the castle? But no. He was a man that never lost a battle. Not even a battle of wills.

It was well after dark when the girl stuck her head into his office again. “K-Kenshin? Sir?”

He looked up from his battle diagrams. “Yes?”

“C-could I go home now? It’s a holiday and - and my friends are waiting for me. I was supposed to get off work two hours ago but I was trying to finish everything first. I-It’s just too much for one day. Sir.” The words tumbled out of her mouth in a flood. 

“You can leave when you’re done.” Kenshin bent back down over his own work, annoyed at the disruption. 

He heard the girl slide the ricepane panel shut, her tread slow as she returned to her desk. “I pay her too much,” he muttered. “Such defiance. Deserves nothing.” But as he thought it, he remembered he didn’t actually pay her at all. She’d been a chatelaine for his enemies - he captured her, brought her back and, well, she had to have something to keep her busy. So all in all, hiring her was a pretty good investment.

Midnight neared and it was only then that the girl wearily stood, stretched her arms and back, and then trudged toward Kenshin’s office. This time she didn’t even open the door. “I finished,” she told him. Her voice was low and weary. Exhausted. 

“Then I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow to start on the next batch!”

“Lord Kenshin . . . please . . . could I have tomorrow off to spend with my friends? I - I mentioned it’s a holiday?” Her pleading took on a desperate note. 

“I suppose you’ll be spending it with those other poor fools. Tiny Shingen and my nephew Yuki. Wasting a whole day to make merry!”

She squeaked something that sounded like a yes. 

Kenshin frowned. This wasn’t what he liked hearing. Normally, her voice was sweet. He liked to hear it call out to him through the day, masking irritants like chirping crickets or squawking birds. She knew his tastes very well . . . “Gah, fine! Take the day off! But it’s coming out of your salary.”

“My Lord, you don’t pay me. So . . . I guess I’ll see you the day after tomorrow?” 

“I said so, didn’t I?” He tapped his fingers on the desk in annoyance. He’d like to give her one last, good glare before she took off but the door was shut. 

“Th-thank you, my lord! Have a h-happy holiday!” Her rapid footsteps, almost skipping across the boards gave the lie to her earlier exhaustion.

“I should work her harder,” Kenshin muttered. “Then she wouldn’t have time to make friends besides me. I mean - that she would miss because she’s busy working. I don’t have friends.” 

The lonely warlord eventually put his own work away and settled down for a nightcap. Warm sake and some pickled plums. Then he went to his room, dressed for bed, and lay down. Usually, he’d fall asleep as soon as his head met the mat, but tonight he just couldn’t seem to get settled. 

Wind made the branches outside creak, and the window panes rattled. Eventually though, his eyes drifted shut. Welcoming darkness. Dreams he would not remember come morning. Or so he thought.

Ghost of Sasuke

No sooner had Kenshin began to drift into dreamland than he was woken by the clanking of heavy chains and a grumbly voice. 

“Keeeenshiiiiiiin,” the disembodied voice groaned. And the clanking grew louder and closer.

The warlord’s eyes went wide and he stood, grabbing his beloved sword Himetsuru Ichimonji. “Who’s there,” he shouted, swinging the blade in a wide arc.

“It’s me. Sasuke. Don’t you remember me, Kenshin?”

And then in the darkness, a face materialized. Glasses, fluffy brown hair, and a pale green neck scarf.

“What’s wrong with you? Why do you look so pale? And your skin . . .” Sasuke’s skin gave off a pale glow. Kenshin pointed the tip of his sword at the ninja.

“I died, Kenshin! Because of youuuuuuuu . . .” The Sasuke-ghost wailed, and his hands shot out of the darkness to grab at Kenshin’s nightrobe. 

The warlord scrambled back, away from the spirit. “No! That’s not possible. I think I’d remember if you died.”

“Your training . . . killed me,” the Sasuke-ghost whispered.

Kenshin shook his head. He had trained Sasuke hard - hard enough to turn him into one of the best ninja in a generation. But he hadn’t killed him. Had he?

The ghost came closer, chains clanking. “Now, because of you, I am bound for eternity to suffer. Because I went along with all your violent schemes. I enjoyed war too . . . and now I will pay for it. Forever!” 

“I don’t believe a word,” Kenshin growled. “You’re not really here. This is just a bit of undigested plum. An upset stomach from a bad batch of sake. Spirits aren’t real. And my ninja isn’t dead!”

“It doesn’t matter if you believe me or not.” The spirit drew back into the darkness, disappearing from sight. “I only came to warn you, Kenshin. Tonight, you will be visited by three ghosts. The completely original and definitely not trademarked Ghost of Holidays Past, Present, and Future. You must listen to them. Or else.”

Kenshin laughed coldly. “I am not afraid of you, spirit. Or these . . . not . . . trademarked . . . ghosts. Let them come!”

There was no answer. 

The warlord waited, crouched and tense. Nothing else happened. Tired and even more annoyed, he went back to bed. “Have to stop eating pickled plums so late at night,” he murmured. Then rolled over and tried to get back to sleep.

Ghost of Holidays Past

His eyes barely shut when a strange laugh startled him awake again. 

“Ho ho ho,” the laughter boomed, and a finger tapped Kenshin on the shoulder.

The warlord leapt up and started to reach for his sword, but the absurd sight in front of him stopped him in his tracks. A face that seemed old and young all at once, with a beam of light pointed up from its head. He thought for a moment that it was Sasuke again - the thing had glasses on, just like the ninja, but this spirit wore a strange gown and wide, dangerous smile. 

“Who - what are you?” Kenshin inched away from the thing, beginning to feel a bit nervous.

“Didn’t I - I mean, Sasuke, warn you I was coming? I am the Ghost of Holidays Past, Kenshin. And I have come to show you things you’ve forgotten.”

The warlord got to his feet. “I haven’t forgotten anything. So you can leave. I am tired and I want to go to bed now.”

“Oh, I think not Uesugi. You are coming with me.” And the spirit grabbed his hand. The thing’s skin was cold and clammy, like holding to a fish. It led Kenshin out of his room and into a bright-lit hallway. There, people were wasting time and making merry. There were bunnies with colorful ribbons on their necks, and a girl . . .

Kenshin gasped. For a moment she looked like his assistant - the Oda captive and timetraveler. But then he realized it was Isehime. And the boy beside her - was him? It was hard to tell. The face was young and he couldn’t make out the eyes but . . . the boy was wearing his clothes and playing with Isehime and the rabbits. They were laughing together. 

“Do you remember now? The joyful times you had before?”

Kenshin blinked. He absolutely was not crying. It was just dust and the bright light. Yes. He scrubbed a hand over his face and turned to the spirit. “I don’t want to see this anymore. I’m going to bed.”

The Sasuke-similar Ghost of Holidays Past nodded. “I can’t force you to watch. But I think perhaps I’ve jogged a memory loose.” He let go of the warlord’s hand.

Kenshin stumbled back to his room and slid the door shut. What an awful vision that had been! His memories of Isehime came rushing back - all of the good times they had before cruelty and politics ended their youth. Had it been worth it to waste all that time in fun? He shook his head. No. No. That was for children too foolish to know better.

“Enough, spirits,” he growled as he got back into his futon. “I don’t want you showing me anything else.”

Ghost of Holidays Present

Kenshin’s order barely left his lips before another spirit arrived. Just like the last one, it wore glasses too. But this one had a big, bushy beard and a round belly.

“Ho ho ho! I am the Ghost of Holidays Present, here to show you what you’re missing!” The spirit stopped speaking for a moment to adjust his beard. It was slipping sideways as he spoke. “We have a journey tonight, Uesugi. Now come on!” The ghost leapt onto the window sill and held his hand out.

“This is foolish,” Kenshin grumbled. But he stood up and took the spirit’s hand anyway. “You aren’t going to show me anymore visions of . . . her - of Isehime - are you?”

“No. That was past. This is present. You see, the time-differential really isn’t that complex when you take into account the potential for flexion in dimensional space as relates to - ah - I mean, ho ho ho! Let’s uh, go!” The ghost grabbed the offered hand and pulled Kenshin out the window.

“Are you sure you aren’t my ninja?” Kenshin asked, eyeing the spirit as it led him through Kasugayama.

“Who me? No! I’m just your friendly neighborhood ghost.” He poked his round belly. “Your ninja isn’t fat like I am right?” He *carefully* tugged his beard. “And he doesn’t have a beard, right?”

“That is true,” Kenshin agreed. “Just when you were talking. It sounded like the nonsense he says sometimes.

“It’s not nonsense,” the ghost began, but stopped to point. Ahead, there was an open window. Warm lantern-light spilled out onto the snowy ground. Inside, Kenshin could see his assistant. Only . . . she was beautiful. Her hair was down and she was smiling so brightly it made his heart clench in his chest. 

“What - what is this? What are you showing me, spirit?”

“Kenshin, this is the holiday-that-is. Watch.” The ghost let go of his hand.

A figure came up behind the girl, a large man with light brown hair and grey eyes. Kenshin remembered him - a former warrior everyone called Tiny Shingen - a joke, as he was not at all small. He was smiling too. Kenshin’s assistant turned around to look at him and Shingen lifted her up, starting to spin her around. But he stopped, pain twisting his smile into a pained grimace. He began to cough and grabbed at his chest.

“Oh, Shingen. I’m so sorry. If only I had more . . . firewood, yes, firewood to ah, to keep our little home warm. Then you wouldn’t cough so!” She went to a small stove and picked up a kettle to pour Tiny Shingen a cup of tea. 

Another man entered the room - one Kenshin knew all to well. His always cheerful nephew Yuki. He was Kenshin’s last living relative, but honestly, the warlord couldn’t stand him. He was always giving away things and being . . . kind. Not the type of behaviour a war-focused warrior ought to be engaging in. Seeing him here made Kenshin think the boy had too much free time on his hands. He ought to make him train more. Maybe send him out scouting . . .

The girl gave Yuki a hug and he squeezed her tight. The sight sent a dangerous current through Kenshin. No one ought to be touching her like that. So intimately. She was his captive! His assistant! But . . . she looked so pleased. Had she ever smiled at Kenshin that way?

The three of them huddled around the small stove for warmth. But they all looked so happy. Chatting and laughing. As if even this meager life was worth living. 

Kenshin couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed from joy or pleasure. Or hugged. He wondered if he still knew how. He tried out a ‘happy’ laugh. It sounded like a dry cough. Worse than Tiny Shingen.

“Um, what was that?” The ghost gave him a side-eyed glance.

“Nothing.”

“Ah, right then. I think that’s enough. Let’s go back to your room.” The spirit turned to go.

Kenshin grabbed his sleeve. “Wait! Tell me, spirit. Is this really happening? Or is it just a vision, like what I saw from my past?”

The ghost nodded. “It is really happening. Right now. These people are celebrating and joyful, just to be together. Even though you’ve denied them so much . . .”

Kenshin nodded slowly. Perhaps . . . war wasn’t the only thing. He could try to relax. Just on holidays. Maybe pay his assistant. Or. Give her a hug. He smiled at the thought. It might even be pleasant. 

When he got to his window, he stopped and asked the ghost. “Is there one more of these visits tonight? I - I think I’d like to see more of my assistant.” He wasn’t sure why he felt hesitant to ask, but these sights stirred something uncomfortable in him.

“There will be one more visit, Kenshin Uesugi. One more spirit. The Ghost of Holidays Future.” And then in a sudden poof of smoke, the Ghost of Holidays Present was gone.

Kenshin climbed back into his room through the window and sat down on his futon to wait. He was almost excited. 

Ghost of Holidays Yet To Come

Kenshin did not have long to wait. There was a rustling outside his window. When he turned his head to look, all he could see was darkness.

“Come, Kenshin Uesugi. I have things to show you.” The voice came out of the darkness, echoing and cold. Nothing like the previous ghosts of the night.

Still, Kenshin really wanted to see more of his assistant. What she would be doing the next year, for example. Perhaps this ghost could show him a future where Kenshin and the girl played with ribboned rabbits and hugged each other. 

He stepped out into the darkness. In it, he could just make out a form. Heavy robes covered the body, and over the face, a mask. Horned, with bulging eyes and sharp fangs. Like a shinigami, he thought. But he was Kenshin, God of War. Demons did not scare him.

The ghost said nothing, only turned and began to walk.

“Should I follow? Where are we going?” Kenshin hurried after the spirit.

There was no reply. But soon, it became apparent where they were headed. Out of the darkness, a crowd of stone monuments and the gentle slopes of ancient kofun. 

Kenshin stopped. “Wait, spirit. Why are we going to visit graves? Aren’t you supposed to show me holidays?”

The ghost turned and from the depths of its sleeves rose a bony hand, fingers curled in a universal come-hither gesture. 

Feeling unnerved, and wishing he’d brought his sword, Kenshin continued on. Into the dark graveyard. The figure stopped before a fresh dug grave, the marker laying on it’s side nearby. 

The ghost took a lantern from its vest and lit it with a flick of its fingers. In that dim, flickering light, the warlord could just make out the characters carved into stone. Uesugi Kenshin. 

“What? No! I am the undefeated God of War. Nothing can kill me. I should know. I’ve tried.” He put a hand to his mouth surprised by the honesty this spirit coaxed from him. He looked up at it. “What - what is it that kills me? Poison? An assassin? Sickness?”

“Bitterness,” rasped the cold voice. And it gestured to several fresh graves nearby. On them, Kenshin could make out the names of his assistant, and her friends. His nephew Yuki. Tiny Shingen. And Sasuke. 

“Then. This is all my fault?” He knew he’d caused countless deaths on his many campaigns. Soldiers that came to his banner, and numberless enemies. But this was different. If the spirit was right, they would die because of the flaw in his soul - not from some hostile force. 

He swallowed, feeling again the hot sting of unshed tears. “Why do you show me this? Do you think I can change? I have reasons! I have lost . . . so much. If I open my heart again, then what?”

The spirit gestured with a bony finger back toward Kasugayama. There, silhouetted against the city’s lanterns, the form of a girl. His lovely assistant. Could things be different between them? Could he learn to be more than her captor and taskmaster? Kenshin wasn’t sure, but he decided in that moment to try. He was, afterall, the undefeated God of War. It would be ironic if he was his own undoing.

“I think I understand,” he said wearily. “I want to change. I do. I don’t know how but . . . I will try.”

“And you will have help,” the ghost said quietly, in a voice so like Sasuke that it made Kenshin look twice. It laid a hand on the warlord’s shoulder. “Now go home and sleep. Dawn comes.”

Kenshin obeyed. He felt bone-tired, his chest hollow with regret. 

Holiday Epilogue

The morning dawned bright and early. Kenshin woke to the song of birds, and the bustle of the castle. He felt energized. Purposeful. He got up and put on his best clothes, then began summoning servants. There were so many things to get done! Food, wine, music - and decorations! Yes! 

His vassals clearly thought he’d lost his mind, but they knew better than to disobey. His years of harshness served him well in organizing a feast - and not just for his vassals. For the whole town. He wanted everyone to celebrate with him- on this new day, where anything could happen.

When the people gathered and began filling their plates, a gentle sweet voice spoke up behind him.

“Kenshin. Did you really set all this up?” 

The warlord turned, and there she stood. The captured Oda princess, his assistant - no, if he was honest, his slave. But no more. He knelt and took her hand. “I am so sorry for all I have put you through. Today - today is the first step in making it up to you.” He turned his mismatched eyes from her hand up to her gaze. She was wide-eyed, cheeks pink. “Can you forgive me,” he asked.

“I already did,” she smiled. And there it was. That brilliant warmth that made his heart pound. 

“You are too good for this world,” he sighed. “I want you to know - if you want to leave, you can. But if you stay . . . if you stay, I’d like to treat you like a princess. An Uesugi princess.”

She pursed her lips, thinking. “I don’t want to go. I have friends here now. But, what about them? Tiny Shingen needs medical care. And Yuki - he needs etiquette lessons and some time in a hot bath -”

“What did you say, boar woman?” Yukimura shouted at them from across the courtyard, where the feast was laid out. 

Kenshin stood. “Nephew! Come here! I want to apologize.”

“No thanks! I uh, already forgive you too! But I prefer to stay out of stabby range.” Yuki chuckled as he said it, but he didn’t get any closer. 

The girl smiled and squeezed Kenshin’s hand. “It will take time to show him you changed.”

The warlord nodded. “I suppose it will. But in the meantime - I will have the best doctors look after Shingen. Is that . . . alright?”

“I’m sure Shingen will appreciate that,” she replied.

“Is that a goddess with my name on her lips,” asked Shingen as he stepped out into the courtyard. 

Kenshin felt a spike of jealousy, but he took a breath and smiled. “Please don’t flirt with my assistant. Just . . . go get some sweets and wait for the doctors to arrive.”

Shingen’s smile was wide. “I haven’t even started to flirt, Kenny. But alright. I am feeling peckish. I’ll be back later to see how my angel fares.”

Sasuke flipped down from a nearby roof to land in a one-knee crouch, superhero style right in front of his lord. “I might have a better idea for Shingen’s care my lord. If I can offer.”

“I thought you were dead. I saw your ghost.” Kenshin reached out and grabbed Sasuke’s cheek, pinching it. “You feel real enough though.”

For some reason, Shingen and the girl were laughing. Yuki was too, from his spot across the yard. 

“I assure you - I am very muth alive. Pleath let go of my cheek.”

Kenshin released his ninja. “So you are. You can tell me all about this idea later. Today, we celebrate. It is . . . a holiday.” And he smiled down at his assistant, who still held one of his hands.

[evil-slytherin-queen]

Must've Been the Wind

warning: physical abuse, abuse, violence, Vernon Dursley is an asshole

Draco lugged the last two boxes into his new flat. One pushed through the door by his foot and the other in his arms. He settled them both on the ground and sighed with content. Finally, he had all of the boxes out of his car, even if it had taken all day.

This was going to be brilliant. A new start. Far away from his family, their dirty money and nothing stopping him from pursuing whatever and whoever he bloody well pleased. All he had to do was unpack.

Draco scanned the floor of his newly bought flat and suppressed a groan at all the boxes laid about. He'd definitely have to ring up Pansy, and the boys to help him unpack and organize everything. Speaking of, Draco grinned at the thought and swiped to answer his ringing cell.

"I was just thinking of you," Draco hummed, as he walked into the kitchen, hoping to put on some tea. 

"Lovely, I wanted to see how you were, darling. How's the flat? Not too common I hope?" 

Draco snorted at that, of course Pansy would be worried about it being 'too common'. He glanced around the flat once more and realized how common Pansy would certainly find it. It wasn't overly cheap, or run down but it was nothing compared to either of their childhood homes. The flat had only three rooms: a bedroom and bath, the living and dining area, and the kitchen. She would be mortified. 

"You do realize, I bought this on my salary, Pans?" He said, rummaging through one of the boxes labeled kitchen to find his kettle, mugs, and some tea.

"Yes, yes, I suppose I'll simply have to get used to it then." 

Draco finally managed to pull out what he was looking for and smiled at his success as he filled the kettle with tap water and turned the gas stove on.

"Poor, Princess Pansy, having to visit her dearest friend in squalor, so terribly close to peasants, however will she survive?" Draco cried dramatically, leaning his hip against the counter as he waited, a snooty smirk plastered on his face.

"Oi! Watch yourself, Draco, darling. Wouldn't want me to do anything unsavoury next time I see you, now would we? And it's queen not princess, thank you very much."

Draco resisted the urge to snort again as he carded a hand through his mused hair. He and Pansy both really did have quite a flare for the dramatics. It was a wonder how the world survived with the pair of them as friends.

"Speaking of seeing one another, would you like to help-"

A loud crash, one that sounded an awful lot like glass shattering, cut Draco off from finishing his statement. The sound had come from the flat above his and he drew his eyebrows up in confusion, then shrugged. Someone had most likely just dropped something, it was fine.

"Draco?"

"Right, sorry, thin w-"

-walls. Apparently, there were very thin walls between Draco's flat and the one above him seeing as he was interrupted once again, this time by two different voices. It sounded like a man shouting angrily and someone...whining or crying perhaps?

"Draco?"

Worry spiked in his chest as he turned the stove top off again. He quickly grabbed his keys and found himself locking the door and walking down the hall. Even if he was acting a bit paranoid, he couldn't ignore what sounded like a domestic gone bad, especially not when it sounded so violent.

"Hello? Draco?"

"Er, yes, sorry Pansy. I think I'm going to have to call you back." Draco sighed, as he pressed the button next to the lift. 

"Alright, have a goodnight, darling. Be safe!" 

"Always am, goodnight, love." And with that Draco hung up the phone. 

The lift arrived and he walked in letting it take him to the second floor. He hoped he was wrong, he didn't need this sort of thing taking over his mind just as he started settling into his new life. He was far too protective over his friends as it was, he didn't need another person to worry and fret over like a nervous mother. Besides, he was supposed to be a wild and reckless nineteen-year-old, not a parent.

"Please, let this be a misunderstanding." He whispered to himself as he exited the lift and walked towards the flat that would be directly above his and knocked. A moment or so passed and Draco genuinely considered leaving before anyone answered the door. He really wasn't fond of conflict and this could definitely be a recipe for disaster. He had to learn to keep his nose out of others business but...

In that moment a young man, looking more than a bit skittish, opened the door. He was a head shorter than Draco with startlingly green eyes framed by round, crooked glasses and messy black hair.

"Yes?" The man asked, his eyes flickering over Draco for a second then landing back on the space off to the side of him. He looked so small, skin and bones. His tanned skin looked pale and he had a sweater zipped all the way up, purple and yellow smudges peaking out of the collar on his neck.

The sight unsettled Draco to say the least. 

"I-ahem-sorry. I heard shouting and it sounded like someone had gotten hurt. I wanted to make sure everything was alright. I recently moved into the flat just beneath you." Draco explained with an awkward smile. He desperately resisted the urge to ask about the markings on his neck. People never seemed to appreciate his overly observant tendencies.

The man froze a little and opened his mouth and closed it a couple of time's before responding. "I broke a glass. As for the shouting, I wouldn't know anything about that." His voice shook a little and he sounded like he didn't believe himself either.

"Are you sure? You're alright?" Draco asked the doubt evident on his face as he laced his fingers together hoping to distract himself from the worry filling his stomach.

"Where're you at boy!" 

A loud voice called from inside the flat and Draco saw the young man visibly flinch. This was not good. This was terrible, actually. The man swallowed and looked back at Draco.

"Thank you, for caring, sir, that's kind of you, but I've got to go back in. Wish I could explain the noise, but I didn't hear anything. It must've been the wind, it can get particularly loud around here, especially at night." The man said, with a tone that Draco could only assume was an attempt to reassure him that nothing was amiss. It wasn't working. Draco itched to press the subject further but pushed it aside and nodded. It wasn't his place. He didn't have any real clue what was going on and they were strangers.

"Right, I'm sorry to disturb you so late then. I'm Draco, by the way, and the 'sir' isn't necessary." Draco said, taking a deep breath, as he tried to calm himself down. No use getting worked up over the few signs of abuse this stranger was harboring. He couldn't do anything about it despite his need to fix things. And he didn't even know for sure if there was an 'it' to do anything about as it was.

"Harry. Sorry, for being so loud. I really have to-"

"Boy!"

"Coming Uncle Vernon! I have to go, sorry again." Harry replied, turning to go back in and closing the door in a rush. Draco shook his head and sighed. He could be imaging all of this. Maybe Harry was just shy and maybe nothing had truly happened. He didn't know all of the facts. He could just be over assuming and seeing something that wasn't there. Draco shook his head once more and headed back towards his flat.

•••

"Wait, wait, wait! Hold it right there, boys! Do not move." Pansy ordered throwing her hand up in a 'stop' gesture. Blaise and Theo froze holding the painting at an awkward and uncomfortable angle as she picked apart whether or not she approved of hanging it there. This was the fifth time she had done this.

"What do you think, darling?" She asked tossing her head to the side and glancing at Draco with her perfectly winged eyeliner.

Draco grinned at the irritated scowls Theo and Blaise carried and Pansy's utter obliviousness to it. He really appreciated his friends for helping him get settled into his new home and the entertainment they brought with them, too.

"Hmmm." Draco hummed quirking a mischievous eyebrow at the boys who sent him ice cold glares in response.

"Draco, if you don't like it here then I'm going to toss this out of the bloody window." Blaise snapped, looking rather bitter. How very Zabini of him, his mother would approve.

"Yeah, come on. My arms are tired, hurry it up. There's only so many places in this tiny flat to hang this!" Theo groaned, a pout settling on his face. Draco laughed loudly and waved his hands at them in a dismissive manner.

"Alright, alright, it's fine right there. Set it down and we'll have some tea and biscuits." Draco said, smiling as they put it down with grumbles and Pansy walked over swatting at both of them.

"We are trying to make Draco's home pleasant to look at and be in! Don't. You. Two. Care?!" She hissed, scowling as she finished smacking the two up a bit. The boys dodged her on the last few smacks and came back full force to tickle her. One didn't simply tickle Pansy unless they had a death wish and were prepared for violent retaliation.

Draco found himself being used as a shield on both ends as Blaise and Theo antagonized Pansy and she continued to slap at them. He shook his head fondly at his silly friends.

"Only God knows when I became the mature one of us." He mused with a wry smile, when the three of them exchanged a look. That was dangerous and he knew it.

"What makes you think you're not a part of this?" Blaise asked, stalking towards him a dangerous glint in his eye. Oh, fuck.

"Now, wait a minute. Blaise."

"Yeah, Draco, who said you got a free pass?" Theo continued from behind him. This was not going to end well. Draco suppressed the urge to try and run and turned to face his most loyal and trusted friend for help.

"Pansy?" He asked, a hopeful lilt to his voice and when she only shook her head in response he knew he was doomed. The traitor. In a flash, all three of them were on him, tickling him mercilessly. He squealed at them and tried to wriggle out of Blaise's grip but to no avail. 

Laughter swirled in the room and they all ended up sprawled all along the floor, their heads resting together, making a circle. They stared at Draco's ceiling, a happy feeling floating in the air after the impromptu tickle assault. 

"You are happy here. Right mate?" Theo asked quietly, after a beat or two of silence, his and Blaise's hands tangled together. Draco smiled at them out of the corner of his eye. He knew, as much as they liked to say they were casual, that they were end game for sure. Him and Pansy had even gone as far as to discuss what their future wedding might look like.

"Yes, I am. I just... I couldn't listen to their disappointment any longer." He replied softly, and he felt Pansy reach out to him, intertwining their fingers to comfort him.

"Sorry they didn't take it well. Mother barely came around to the idea and, well, you've seen her around Theo and I," Blaise hummed lightly, even if the conversation hadn't taken a light turn, "It's bloody awkward."

"Whereas, I still have the disgusting privilege of coming out to look forward to. Whoever came up with this was a right bastard." Pansy glared at the ceiling with her words and Draco gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. He knew the feeling, he'd hardly been able to get the words out last year when he had finally decided to tell his parent he was gay.

This is why they all worked so well as friends. They all had posh, homophobic traditional, filthy-rich, old-English families. And they were all massive homos, despite how much Draco's parents tried to deny it.

"Don't worry, if worst comes to worse, we can always be roommates." Draco suggested, holding in a giggle at the idea of seeing Pansy with bed head. He couldn't imagine it, her looking anything but pristine.

"Or you could move into my house. You know my mother adores you." Blaise said as Theo nodded along.

"Or mine, Mother and Father wish you were their daughter, Pansy. I think they'd try to adopt you if they could." Theo added with a snort.

She let out an indignant huff and drew herself up off of the floor, leaving the rest of them to sit up and lean against one another, looking at her with curious expressions.

"You boys need to quit with this or I might have feelings about it." She said, with an appalled shake of her head. And they all grinned at her. 

"Awe, we love you too, Ice Queen." Draco sang, jumping to his feet and pressing a wet kiss to her cheek which she promptly wiped off. Theo and Blaise chuckled behind him and shuffled to their feet.

"Now, didn't you say something about biscuits, Draco?" Theo asked waggling his eyebrows at him. His notorious sweet tooth making Draco shake his head in fond exasperation. 

"Yes, I'll get started on tea, while you three finish hanging that painting." Draco said, wandering into his kitchen. A satisfied smile gracing his lips.

•••

Around two weeks after he had moved in, Draco found himself making his way up to Harry's flat for the second time. He had almost forgotten about the whole incident, seeing as things had been rather quiet ever since, but he'd still had that nagging feeling in the back of his head that something bad was going to happen.

Blaise, Theo, and Pansy were over this time. All four of them huddled together on the couch with dozens of snacks, pillows, and blankets surrounding them as they watched some convoluted French horror film Pansy had brought with her. A loud thud made Theo and Pansy jump. Theo threw himself into Blaise's lap and hid his face in his neck while Blaise laughed, seemingly immune to the movie, and Pansy clung onto Draco fiercely.

Shouting came next, followed by a door slamming loudly, another thud and then what sounded like crying. The fact that all of these sounds were filtering through Draco's ceiling made it finally click for him. It was Harry's flat again. Bloody hell.

Blaise paused the movie and glanced at Draco with a look. 

"What was that?" He asked, running a hand through Theo's hair. Draco nudged Pansy off of him, who went with a grumble, and stood up, looking for his slippers.

"Neighbor's. I'm not positive, but I think Harry's being abused by his uncle, at least that's what it seems like." Draco replied, successfully finding his shoes and slipping them on. He'd had time to mull over what he'd seen that night and decided he was probably correct about the domestic violence occurring above him.

"Hold on, sorry, back up a second. Who's Harry?" Pansy asked snuggling a pillow to her chest. 

"And why do you think he's being abused? You can't always stick yourself into people's lives, Draco." Theo sighed, turning around to join in the conversation. Draco fought off a scowl, he wasn't sticking himself into anything if this Vernon was going to be so bloody loud about it.

"I've gone up to check before. Harry lives up there with his uncle, I suppose. He looks about our age, maybe a little younger. And he had bruises on his neck, Theo, like hands-choking-you-out sort of bruises, I doubt they were consensual." Draco said, feeling his anger simmer at the reminder of it. Blaise hushed Theo from continuing his disapproval and nodded at Draco. 

"Go, on. We'll be here." 

"And don't be daft about it, don't get yourself hurt!" Pansy added quickly as he slipped out the door and headed for the lift once again. 

When he made it to their door, dread filled his body as he saw a fist sized dent in the wall next to it. Red staining it from whoever's bloody knuckles had met the wall. And he could hear faint whimpers coming from inside the flat. He heaved in a deep breath and knocked on the door lightly. The sound of crying stopped abruptly and he could hear scrambling just before the door opened.

Harry answered it, crooked glasses, pretty green eyes, messy hair and all. He looked distressed, his eyes red rimmed and his hands were shaking. The skin around one of his eyes was a harsh red, like he'd just taken a punch to the face and his lips quivered a little. Draco frowned.

"I-I'm sorry, Uncle-" He paused and took a step back when he finally looked up to meet Draco's eyes, "Oh, it's you." 

Draco nodded minutely and studied Harry for another minute before responding.

"Yeah, I heard yelling. I wanted to check up on you. Did your...um, what happened to the wall?" Draco asked softly, trying for a comforting smile, but he only managed to lessen his frown a little. He couldn't find it in himself to smile at this. 

Harry looked away from him and seemed to shrink in on himself at the question. He said nothing and Draco took that as his answer. He stifled a sigh and put his hands in his pockets, bouncing on the balls of his feet. He couldn't imagine how Harry must be feeling. It must be awful and he must be terrified.

"I-" Draco stopped himself and thought a little. He didn't just want to leave it at that. As much as he didn't want to intrude, he felt worse, leaving without offering any sort of lifeline. Then he'd be like every other occupant in this building who hadn't done anything about this.

"I won't pretend to know what you're going through," He said, carefully.

Harry glanced up at him when he spoke and bit his lip like he was stopping himself from responding. So, Draco continued,

"I simply want you to know that, you're always welcome to come over. You can stay for a couple of hours if you need to get out of here for a while. You can come over if you need a friend or you want to talk about this, or anything, really."

Harry eyed him suspiciously, like Draco might take back his words or break out into cruel laughter over what he'd just suggested. Draco reached up and ran a hand though his hair and licked his lips, trying to find the right words to say.

"I won't ask you about anything you don't want to talk about and I promise I'm not playing some cruel trick on you. You're welcome, anytime, day or night. And I mean that, Harry." Draco said firmly, putting as much sincerity in his words as he could. He truly did mean it, but he couldn't force Harry to seek out help or come to him, even if he wanted to. If anything, Draco thought that might actually make the situation worse.

Draco was met with more silence and Harry kept staring at him with those impossibly green eyes full of an emotion he couldn't place. He nodded once and finished off his little speech.

"Until you tell me otherwise, I'm sure it was just the wind. And I'm in flat 1C, in case you needed it. Have a goodnight, Harry."

With those words and one last meaningful look Draco turned to leave. There wasn't anything else he could do. He heard the man clear his throat just as he was going to step away, so he turned towards Harry quickly as to not miss his words.

"Thank you, Draco." Harry whispered softly, a small smile settling on his face. Draco grinned back and nodded again.

"Of course."

•••

A few more weeks past and Harry had shown up to Draco's flat many times for tea. The first time it had been awkward and the air felt heavy with the unspoken words, but soon enough they settled into a tentative friendship. 

Draco learned that Harry was eighteen. He liked football and he could've been a star player if he hadn't gotten hurt in his 4th year playing. He had an intense passion for animals, owls specifically, and he loved the idea of starting a sanctuary. He'd just graduated the summer before, and he loved the stars, Draco being one of his favorite constellations (a fact that Draco reveled in). His favorite color was gold and his favorite dessert was treacle tarts (which Draco now had a habit of keeping on hand at all times).

Draco also had a a large suspicion that Harry wasn't straight, as he had been particularly interested in the pride flag Draco had pinned to one of his walls that read "Love Is Love". When he had asked about it Harry turned into a blushing, stuttering mess and excused himself, saying he had somewhere to be.

They never mentioned Harry's home situation. Draco never asked and Harry never offered an explanation. Although, the bruises that would appear all over Harry's body, at least the visible one's, made Draco itch to swoop in and play hero. Every time he noticed a new one he had to bite his tongue to stop himself from asking. Either way he enjoyed Harry's company and he wasn't about to ruin that with his compulsive need to fix everything and help people. At the very least Draco knew that Harry felt safe the few hours he spent at his flat. And for now, that was enough.

•••

The third time Draco made his way up to Harry's flat he had never dreaded it more. Whatever had happened, it had been loud. Louder than any sort of yelling he'd ever heard before. He knocked on the door and for the first time, Harry wasn't the one to answer it. 

Instead, a fat, red faced, man opened the door. He had more hair on his upper lip than on his head and the moustache only served to make him look even angrier than he already did.

"You!" The man growled, his beady eyes narrowing so much that they were only slits. So that was how this was going to go.

"Sorry?" Draco replied, recognizing the voice as this so called 'Uncle Vernon' and only mildly shocked by the amount of aggression expressed in one word.

"You stay the bloody hell away from me and my family, fucking faggot!" Vernon spat, his face turning a darker shade of red as he went. Draco stared at him for a moment, wide eyed and speechless. 

It wasn't like he hadn't had the slur thrown at him before, but he wasn't expecting it here. Although, he wouldn't put it passed this man to throw out slurs so casually.

"I'm only here to check on Harry, then I'll leave." Draco said, a stony expression settling on his face. He was furious with how rude this man was being but he had to play nice if he wanted to make sure Harry was alright. He said nothing else, however his glare could've burned holes into the ignorant gits face. And he'd deserve it too.

"I think not! He won't be seeing the likes of you anymore, not while he lives under my roof. You've filled that boys head with enough nonsense and I won't stand for it!" Vernon yelled, then promptly slammed the door in his face. Draco was fuming.

He stomped his way back to his flat and threw himself into angry cleaning every room. Draco hated how useless he was in this situation. He couldn't go knocking down Vernon's door and he couldn't call the police, Harry would no doubt deny it all and feel utterly betrayed, which would amount to nothing other than a broken friendship. He could do virtually nothing and it burned. 

By the time he finished scrubbing every inch of his kitchen his rage had given way to worry. What had happened? How many new bruises had Harry received from this last round of beatings? Gods, Draco felt sick. He needed to tell someone before the worry ate him alive.

He dragged his way from the kitchen to his bedroom and grabbed his cell to message- he didn't know who. Pansy? No, she would go into a full rage and actually try and hurt someone. Even if the idea of hurting Vernon gave Draco great satisfaction it wouldn't help the situation. Theo would only go on about how Draco shouldn't put his nose where it wasn't wanted and leave it be. He always made it a point to tell Draco that he couldn't save everyone and trying to do so only hurt him in the end. Bloody hell, he didn't want to deal with that.

He settled on Blaise. He would listen to Draco rant and if he came over he wouldn't try anything like Pansy would. And he'd always been the best with advice, every since they were younger. He sent him a quick message asking him to come over and set the kettle on the stove. 

A short fifteen minutes later, Draco had Blaise sitting at his dining table scrutinizing him with his dark eyes as he stirred his tea. He had just finished explaining the situation and Blaise's silence was killing him.

"Well? Aren't you going to say anything?"

Blaise fixed him with a look and raised an eyebrow. Draco hated this. Maybe he should have let Pansy come and attack the man upstairs, instead.

"What would you like me to say, Draco?" Blaise asked, his eyes scanning over him in that calculating way that only a Zabini could pull off. 

Draco deflated at that. He didn't know. He supposed he'd had some sort of childish hope that Blaise would have a magical solution even if he knew that was unrealistic.

"Lord above, I don't know, Blaise. This is all such a mess!" He groaned, dropping his head in his hands as he went. Draco heard Blaise sigh as he tugged Draco's hands off of his face. 

"Draco, I know this is difficult. I can tell you care about this, about Harry, but it sounds like you've already realized that you can't do anything." Blaise said softly, as he held one of Draco's hands, rubbing his thumb over the back of it in a comforting manner. He hated when Blaise pointed things like that out, especially when he was right.

"I hate this." Draco whispered, leaning back in his chair and shutting his eyes. "I wish I didn't care so much." 

"Draco Lucius Malfoy, look at me." Blaise said firmly and Draco found himself listening to his command. He knew better than to not respond when Blaise used his full name. 

"Don't ever regret caring about others the way you do. Not ever," Blaise held his gaze fiercely,"You've saved all of us from ourselves countless times and you make us better people because of who you are. Never wish to be apathetic."

Draco nodded dumbly and he hated himself a little for the tears pressing against his eyes. Why did he have to have so many bloody feelings all of the time.

"Blaise," was all he could managed to choke out before tears made their way down his face and he was swept into strong arms. They stood like that for a while, Blaise running a comforting hand up and down his back as he cried from all of the worry and the frustration he had about Harry. Sometimes he felt so bloody useless.

•••

It has been a week and three days since Draco had last seen Harry and he had counted every second of it. The last time he'd been this stressed out and high strung was when some prick at school had threatened to out him to his parents. And his friends had noticed, which is why they were all piled around his coffee table sitting on the floor in front of the sofa and playing board games.

"You can't just do that!" Theo said, slamming his hands on the table at Pansy's invasion of his part of the map. She let out a cackle and knocked more of his pieces off of the board.

"Yes, dear, Theo, I can. That is how you conquer, boys." She grinned, sitting back with a satisfied look on her face. Draco and Blaise laughed as Theo let out a scandalized huff.

They'd been playing Risk for the better part of an hour and Pansy had wiped both Blaise and Draco off of the board, leaving Theo to handle her assault. The distraction of it all was making Draco feel marginally better, not to mention the shots they'd taken earlier.

"This was a brilliant idea, Pans, my queen, thank you," Draco said, pulling her into a hug as Theo grumbled about Pansy always winning and why did they even play anymore which Blaise quickly silenced by smothering him in kisses.

"Ew! Get a room," Pansy gagged tossing throw pillows at them until they broke apart laughing, childishly sticking their tongues out at her. And all Draco could do was smile. He couldn't ask for better friends. He didn't know how he managed to grow up with the least judgmental and most kind hearted people he'd ever met, especially since they all had such horrid parents to deal with, but he was grateful.

His pleasant reverie came to an abrupt stop when someone began pounding on his front door.

"It's nearly midnight, who in their right mind," Pansy scoffed, as she stood up too more than likely yell at whoever it was. 

"Hey, it's alright, Pans. It's probably nothing, why don't you pick another game," Draco said, standing up and making his way over towards the door where the knocking continued in an almost frantic way. It was probably Mrs. Figg looking for her cat again.

"Hey, what can-Harry? W-what happened?" Draco asked, his stomach dropping, suddenly, he felt stressed and anxious and sick all over again. 

Harry looked terrified. He had tears running down his face, which was littered with cuts and he had a split lip that was bleeding. His chest was heaving and he kept glancing behind him like he was waiting for something or someone. His hair was more of a mess than usual and his glasses were nearly hanging off of his face.

"Draco, I didn't- I didn't know where else to," Harry gasped, "He said he was going to...he h-had a knife. I don't-I don't want to d-die."

"Oh my god, come here." Draco breathed out, pulling the trembling man into his arms and rubbing his back. He felt Harry freeze, then melt into the touch and cry harder, wrapping his arms around him in return. And Draco couldn't help but wonder how long it had been since someone had touched him without hurting him. The thought made him hold Harry tighter.

"I won't let him touch you, never again. You're safe now, Harry, I promise." Draco soothed, stroking his hair and pulling him further into the flat.

"What's happening?" Theo asked as he and Blaise stood up and Pansy walked back into the room holding a bottle of Firewiskey, scanned the room and then set it down with a questioning look.

"Where are you, boy!" A voice howled from the corridor and Draco's eyes snapped toward the still open door as Harry whimpered and burrowed himself further in his arms.

"Blaise, Theo, make sure that man doesn't get in here and lock the door. Pansy, call the police, tell them there's a man trying to break in with the means to hurt us and that he's already commited assault." Draco ordered, fire burning behind his eyes. This would be the last time Vernon ever put his hands on Harry, Draco would make sure of that. 

Pansy immediately began dialing and the boys went to the door where a flash of the angry man could be seen. Draco nodded once before he brought Harry towards his bedroom and away from the yelling.

"It's going to be okay. Come now, love, let me clean you up a little, please?" Draco softy asked, when Harry refused to let go of him when he tried to pull him off. God, everything about this broke Draco's heart.

When Draco managed to get Harry off of him, he settled him on the bed and went to get his first aid kit. Before he could get more than a few steps away, Harry snatched his sleeve and Draco turned to face him.

"Please, d-don't leave me alone." Harry whispered, looking at him with those brilliant green eyes, shiny with tears. Draco's heart ached at the sight.

"Okay, I'm sorry. I'll stay here, love." Draco sighed heavily, sitting next to Harry and wrapping an arm around him. He really wished Harry would let him fix the little cuts on his face and his bleeding lip but if this is what he wanted, Draco wouldn't take that from him. He couldn't bear the thought of Harry feeling more unsafe than he already did.

"I'm s-sorry," Harry hiccuped, leaning against Draco, "I n-never meant to drag you into this. It's all-all m-my fault."

"No, Harry, love. This isn't your fault. I should've helped you sooner and you did your best, sometimes surviving is all we can do," Draco said, tucking Harry's head under his chin and running a hand up and down his arm, "And it's okay to ask for help when we need it."

Harry sank further into Draco's side at those words and took in a shaky breath just as Pansy came into the room.

"Draco, the police are one their way and the arsehole is locked out. Blaise sent me in to tell you that we need pictures, if his mother is going to be able to convict the fucker banging on your door," She said as she shut the door on the sound of yelling and loud thuds, "He thought Harry would be more comfortable with me than another man in the room."

Draco nodded in response and he appreciated his friends more than ever in that moment. He loved that they all adopted the same vendetta against the man outside without so much as a word. 

"Harry, darling, I'm Pansy. Would it be alright if I took a few photos of you?" Pansy asked, as she crouched down in front of him and he nodded, "Alright, I'll need you to sit up for a quick minute, then you can go back to leaning on Draco, hmm?" 

Harry nodded again and pulled himself off of Draco, but holding onto his hands tightly. Pansy snap some photos on her phone and asked before she touched him to maneuver his face and take off his glasses, to see all of the damage and he let her without a fuss. 

"There we are, darling. All done." She hummed with a small smile, patting his knee as she stood up.

"Thank you, Pansy. Would you mind grabbing the first aid kit, it's in the bathroom, under the sink?" Draco said, while Harry fell against him once more, wrapping his arms around his torso. She nodded and went off to get it taking Harry's unsalvageable glasses with her.

"What am I going to do? What if he-what if he comes back and tries to...where-where am I going to live?" Harry asked quietly and Draco found himself answering before he could think.

"I promise, we will make sure that man stays very far away from you, for a very long time. Once the police arrest him, we'll go up to the flat and take all of your things and bring them down here. And we'll figure everything else out once things have settled." 

Harry nodded mutely and let Draco clean him up once Pansy came back with the supplies, although convincing him he had to let go of Draco before he could do so had been a struggle.

By the time the police arrived and had arrested Vernon Dursley, which Draco had learned was his full name from the officers and landlords conversation, Harry's face was all cleaned up, save for the busted lip and he'd finally stopped shaking. And Draco couldn't remember him ever looking so young, without his glasses, his eyes seemed ten times bigger and greener than before. It made the awful situation hurt so much more.

Theo and Blaise were left to clean up all of the games and snacks they'd had out earlier while Pansy, Draco, and Harry went to collect his things from his flat. Draco was appalled to find that Harry had been crammed into nothing more than a closet and Pansy went about taking photos before they moved anything. Draco had never felt more disgusted by another human being in his life than when Harry asked quietly if Pansy needed photos of his other injuries. He'd pulled off his shirt to reveal scars all along his chest and his back with bruises in different stages of healing and Draco felt sick to his stomach. He'd kill that man if he ever had the chance.

Once everything was said and done, the five of them were crammed together in the living room, the telly playing in the background. Draco sat drinking the tea Theo had made, running a hand through Harry's curls, who had fallen asleep with his head in Draco's lap. Theo and Blaise weren't far from passing out themselves as they lay tangle together on the other side of the sofa. Pansy took up the recliner, mindlessly flipping through the channels, a pair of Draco's silk pajamas resting loosely on her petite frame.

"You know, Draco, that was very stupid of you. Going up to their flat like you did, several times apparently. Not telling anyone." Pansy said absently, not asking for an explanation, but simply stating a fact. Draco looked at her, her eyes still focused on the telly, not bothering to look at him as she spoke. He'd hurt her. He knew he had, she was his best friend and he'd gone to Blaise and hadn't even mentioned the topic to her other than the one time they'd all heard the commotion upstairs. 

He let out a heavy sigh and carded his fingers through Harry's hair once again.

"I know."

"Most people would have called the police sooner, or complained to the landlord first but you've never been most people have you, darling." Pansy said, but the question was rhetorical and they both knew the answer. Draco liked to play hero and he liked to fix people which entailed him nosing his way into others business and having no regards for himself. He said nothing.

"I'm going to give you money to help pay the rent, put Harry into therapy, whatever it is you need."

"Pansy, you don't have to-"

"I know, but I want to. You're my best friend and you are clearly head over heels for that boy. And even if you weren't, he deserves to feel happy and safe."

Draco's face flushed at the words as he stared at her wide eyed. 

"I-no, I'm not...I don't..."

"Whatever you say, darling." Pansy hummed, sounding like she didn't believe him in the slightest and far too amused for his liking. He watched her flip off the screen and make herself comfortable, pulling a blanket over herself. 

"I'd take Harry with you to your bed or you'll both be kicked off of the sofa by Theo in the middle of the night. Either way, goodnight, Draco."

"Goodnight, Pans."

In the end, Draco followed her advice, carrying a sleeping Harry to his bedroom and falling asleep next to him.

•••

[6 months later]

"My love, my light, my stars!" Harry sang from his spot on their bed, one of the only things they'd managed to unpack and put together properly since they'd moved into their new flat. Moving was something Harry's therapist had suggested they do, so they had, and now it truly felt like their flat.

"Yes, love?" Draco asked as he finished buttoning up his shirt and turned to face his boyfriend of three months. Harry gave him a coy smile, his pretty green eyes, something Draco could never get enough of, full of mischief. He grabbed Draco's hand tugging him down till their faces were mere inches from each other. 

"What if," Harry murmured, lacing his fingers around Draco's collar and pulling him closer, "what if we stayed in, instead of going for lunch with everyone, hmm?" 

Harry kissed him deeply, nipping at his bottom lip and Draco's knees went weak. Lord, this man would be the death of him. It took all of Draco's will power and strength to untangle Harry's hands from his shirt and pull away from the kiss. Harry pouted up at him and Draco almost gave in to his request until he remembered the surprise he'd arranged with Pansy.

"Devious today, aren't we? Sorry, love, we still have to go." Draco said with a smile, landing a quick peck on his still pouting lips. "Please get dressed, I'll make you your favorite tea if you do." 

Harry grinned at him and pulled him into another hot kiss. 

"You'd make it for me anyway," Harry said smugly, then he stood up and went to rifle through his drawers for something to wear. 

"The things you do to me, Harry James Potter." Draco sighed over dramatically pulling a laugh from Harry as he went to make tea.

•••

"Ready?" Draco asked pulling open the door of the restaurant they were meeting everyone at, including two special guests that Pansy and Draco had invited.

"What aren't you telling me, Draco?" Harry asked looking up at him, a curious smile tugging at his lips as they walked in holding hands. 

"You'll see." Draco hummed happily, pulling Harry against his side as they walked towards their reserved table.

Draco and Pansy had arranged for two of Harry's old school mates to meet them there. Harry had shown Draco a photo of all three of them in his 4th year just before they'd graduated and he'd told him about how he regretted losing touch with them once school had ended. So, being the amazing boyfriend he was, Draco snapped a photo of the picture and sent it to Pansy with their names asking her to help find them. Pansy then hired a private investigator, a little over the top if you asked Draco, and made quick work of finding Hermione Jean Granger and Ronald Billius Weasley. 

"Surprise, darling!" Pansy nearly shouted, pulling Harry away from Draco the second they made it to the table and planting a kiss on his cheek. "Draco and I managed to track these two lovely people down for you." 

She then pushed him towards a beautiful woman with wild curls and a tall ginger haired man covered in freckles. At first it took him a moment to process, Hermione and Ronald both giving him fond smiles and a little wave.

"It's been a while, Harry." Hermione said lightly, she looked like she wanted to pull him into a hug but she didn't. Draco assumed Pansy had let them know how Harry could be about touching sometimes. Something Harry had finally gotten past with Draco and Pansy a few months ago.

"We've missed you, mate." Ronald added rubbing his neck awkwardly as Harry kept staring at them open mouthed and wide eyed.

Draco walked up next to Harry, wrapping an arm around his waist. He shook hands with Ronald and Hermione with a smile, hoping to break him out of his trance.

"It's nice to meet you both, Harry told me all about how wonderful you are. Isn't that right, love?" Draco asked, stroking his thumb also Harry's side and glancing at him. Harry seemed to come back to the present and kept glancing between Draco and his old school mates before pulling him into a fierce kiss. 

"Thank you." Harry whispered against a stunned Draco's lips before he pulled away. Bloody hell, his lips were intoxicating. Then he walked straight up to Hermione and Ronald engulfing them in a hug.

By the time Blaise and Theo had joined them Harry, Ronald and Hermione were talking like they'd never stopped and Draco couldn't help but silently watch how happy his boyfriend looked.

Nothing would ever look as gorgeous as Harry, completely unguarded and smiling in this moment.

a/n I feel like this is a bit all over the place but whatever. Also it was inspired by Alec Benjamin's song Must Have Been the Wind.

[angst-fairygodmother]

Light Fingers (The Umbrella Academy)

Diego’s vigilantism brings him repeatedly across the path of a young cat burglar. But as he finds himself developing feelings for the thief, he begins to wonder if there’s more to her than meets the eye, and whether they’re really on opposite sides. And as their relationship deepens, it brings with it a plot involving his estranged adopted father, and threatens to destroy all of them.

CHAPTER 6: LAID BARE

Word Count: 4970 Pairing: Diego Hargreeves x Reader Rating: M Content Warnings: childhood poverty, discussion of theft/thievery, discussion of death, discussion of childhood illness Cross-posted to AO3: here

Previous Chapter: Revelations || Masterlist

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Your eyes traced the flicker of headlights through the narrow half-window as you tried to gather your thoughts into some sort of sense. You wanted to tell him everything. But what did that even mean anymore?

“So what is it you want to talk about?” Diego asked finally, cutting through the waiting silence. 

“Actually,” you looked down at your fingers where they rested on the tabletop, tracing anxious shapes against the laminate. “I know a lot more about you, by virtue of your very public childhood, than you know about me. Which I think, is part of the problem here. So the better question is, where do you want to start?”

“Alright,” he was silent for a moment, jaw twitching as if he was working the words over in his mouth before he said them. “Why do you get so defensive when I say you could do more with your powers, and your skills?”

“Because it’s judgmental, it relies on untrue assumptions, and I don’t like having other people’s will imposed on me,” you explained, face twisting wryly.

“Tell me the truth then.”

“What?”

“If my assumptions aren’t true, set the record straight.”

“You aren’t going to like what I have to say.”

“Now who’s the one making assumptions?”

You sighed. “It’s a long story, especially if I start at the beginning. So you might want to make yourself comfortable.”

He shifted in the hard plastic chair across from you, leaning back with his arms folded across his chest, waiting expectantly.

“Your ‘father’ tried to buy me too, when we were babies,” you couldn’t help throwing air quotes around the word and he smiled at the gesture. “But my parents were stable. They both had jobs; they already had one child and were thinking about trying for another anyway. So they said no. And then my dad died, in a workplace accident, because his boss cut corners to save time and money, and things got hard. And the bastard never got punished for it, or even had the decency to pay for the funeral.”

He looked like he was going to say something, some comment of pity or sympathy and you held up a hand to stop him, knowing that if he did, you would fall apart and never finish telling him what he needed to know, what you needed him to know.

“Your dad showed up again, offered her literal millions to let him have me. At least twice that I know of, but there could have been more. But she was as stubborn as they come. I was her daughter and he wasn’t getting me over her dead body. But a florist’s salary really isn’t enough to raise two kids on. Eventually, I realized that my abilities were things no one else could do, and figured out that I could use them to get things. So when money was skint, Daniel and I could still eat properly; rice and beans can only get a kid so far you know. Or we could have clothes that fit and didn’t have holes without bothering her.”

You shrugged, looking away from the growing ache on his face to stare at some spot on the wall. It had just been the facts of your reality. 

“And then I found that bigger risks meant bigger rewards. I could give her money or things, nice things like she deserved. She would cry and get so mad at me, but she always took them and life seemed to get better.”

“Y/N….” he reached out across the table to take one of your hands, which you hadn’t noticed was getting more and more fidgety as you spoke. 

“I grew up. I realized it wasn’t just us. I figured out how to take care of myself, got a job that let me keep a roof over my head and food in the cupboard. Daniel had his own shit figured out, so I didn’t have to worry about anyone else. But all those other people needed someone to look out for them. And if the people I happen to take things from are the kind that exploit their workers or cheat their taxes instead of paying their fair share, who…cut corners and skimp on safety, who’s it hurting?”

You finally turned your eyes back to him, a challenge sparking in them to tell you that you were wrong.

“So it’s what? Karma with you as it’s righteous deliverer?” He asked.

You pursed your lips. He still wasn’t getting it. 

“Even with what I take, those people have more than they need. And now, kids get proper care; families don’t have to decide between going hungry and getting the lights turned off.” You shook your head. “I don’t know how to put it any simpler than that.”

He frowned. “I don’t...get it. I’m sorry, I’m trying to understand but…”

“Okay, how about an example then. When I stole from that museum, you know the one…”

He smirked at the memory.

“There was this kid. Rare terminal something, something. I don’t remember the details of it. Just that I was able to anonymously pay for the experimental treatment that he needed and he got to live to see twelve. His foster parents and the social worker didn’t have to worry about going bankrupt or applying to the state and praying they’d get funds. And all it cost was one less shiny rock, that some exploited worker probably died to fish out of the ground, wasting space on display.”

“You know,” he said off-handedly as if it wasn’t an obvious attempt to deflect, “the kinds of people that can afford to buy those things aren’t any better than the people you’re stealing from. In fact, they’re probably worse if they’re willing to buy from a fence.”

You rolled your eyes. “So? I’ll just rob them blind to fund a school or whatever later.”

“There’s got to be a better way,” he sighed. “One that isn’t criminal.”

“You find it for me then, Diego,” you snapped. “I’m doing the best I can to help as many people as possible with what I’ve got. And sure maybe there’s a little bit of a revenge angle but who cares? Every one of those assholes deserves it.” 

You felt tears welling up in your eyes, certain that you were losing him, that even after you had ripped your chest open and exposed your bleeding heart for the taking, he was going to ask for you to choose between him and your morals, your passions, things that made up the very fiber of your being.

He stood up, circling the table to kneel in front of you again. His hands came up to cup your face and he brushed away the moisture that leaked down your cheeks with the pads of his thumbs.

“Okay,” he said softly, eyes boring into yours. 

 “Okay? What does that mean, ‘okay’?”

“I still don’t like it,” he started and you growled in frustration before he stared you down. “But...I understand. And I’ll try to stop fighting you on it, judging you for it.”

“Do you actually?” you asked.

“What is that supposed to mean?” he pulled back, not moving away completely, but enough that his hands were no longer on you and you felt cold in a way that had nothing to do with the temperature of the room.

“I don’t know. It’s just this feeling I have. Like I can say whatever I want and tell you my life story in every explicit detail, but…I’m scared that you’re just saying those things to placate me. And that doubt is going to eat me alive.”

“What do you want me to do then, Y/N?”

“Work with me?” you suggested.

“I’m trying,” he countered, frustration leaching into his tone now. 

“No. I mean….Work one job with me, start to finish. Let me show you.”

“You want me to help you steal something?”

“Steal it. Sell it. Put it to good use. Together, as a team, the whole way through.”

“I…” he swallowed before nodding. “Alright.”

Plowing onward, not even registering his answer, you rambled, explaining that you weren’t expecting him to give up being a vigilante or go rogue and that if at any point he wanted out you’d let him, that you would even let him turn you over to the cops, as long as it wasn’t Eudora, if that was what he wanted, you just couldn’t take the doubt anymore. And then your mind caught up to reality and came to a screeching halt.

“Wait, really?” you asked incredulously. 

You had been expecting him not only to say no, but to get angry at the suggestion, bracing yourself for the inevitable complete rejection of it, maybe even of you, and trying to counter it preemptively.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “If you come with me for a night in return. Try things my way too. I…I want there to be an us, and if this is what it takes for there to even be a chance of that, I’m willing to do it.”

You stared, stunned.

“Sounds like a fair trade,” you murmured eventually. “I had no idea you felt so strongly about…this…” you gestured between the two of you, indicating what you meant.

“Of course I do, I l—“ he cut himself off, looking away with a clenched jaw, nervous tension practically vibrating his whole body.

“One other thing?” you said, biting your lip.

“What?”

“We’re both terrible at communication, and trust,” you observed. “I don’t want it to be like that anymore.”

He caressed your cheek once more, smiling softly. “I’ll try to be better if you will.”

You leaned in. “Deal.”

He closed the last gap of centimeters between you, pressing his lips to yours. You slowly sat back up, guiding him into a position hovering over you in the chair as his mouth chased where yours led, refusing to be parted from you. His tongue trailed hesitantly over your bottom lip, and you parted eagerly for him, losing yourself for a blissful moment in the kiss. 

“What time is it?” you mumbled reluctantly between kisses. 

“Why does it matter?” he countered, trying to shift you into a position more comfortable for you both.

“I have work. And you have streets to patrol. Although I know that’s far less exciting without your ravishing nemesis about,” you teased, breaking the kiss completely now.

“Mm...ravishing…” he muttered, eyes closed and face dazed. “I’d like that.”

You laughed. “You weren’t listening at all were you?”

He shook himself, blushing slightly as he opened his eyes to look at you.

“I appreciate your careful nursing, and this talk was...good, necessary, important. I don’t know. But I really do have to go.”

He sighed, sulking. “I know. Fine. I...I’ll see you later?”

“Sure, I’d like that,” you smirked. “Maybe we can revisit the whole, ravishing idea.”

~

Several days later, Diego came over to your apartment. You had suggested it under the guise of, at least partially true, a need to start planning for your heist together. But really, you just wanted to see him again, to spend some time with him now that there was, properly, something between you. 

Your stomach twisted nervously in anticipation, realizing that this was another big step, one quickly after the other, letting him into your home. It had always been your safe place to hide, your sanctum, and you were disrupting that with a new presence. 

But, you reminded yourself, he wasn’t the first (though the total number was incredibly small), and he had already let you into his, even so far as to let you stay there. And you trusted him. More than anyone, save maybe your brother. So it wouldn’t be so bad. 

You were just putting the finishing touches on the pot of cheesy mashed potatoes you had made when the intercom buzzed, indicating someone was at the building’s outer door and wanted to be let in. You hastily crossed the room to press the unlock button and the talk button at the same time.

“It’s open,” you called through the speaker.

There was no response but you heard the odd echo of the door opening and shutting and clicked off the box. A few moments later, someone knocked on your door. Despite knowing there was only one person it could be, you stood on your toes to look through the little peephole before sliding the chain aside and letting Diego in.

“Do you always just unlock your door for strangers?” he asked.

“Hmmm, no. Only the tall, dark and handsome ones.” 

You threaded your arms around his neck to greet him with a quick kiss, shaking your head and laughing when he responded with a hand on your backside.

“Something smells amazing,” he said as you pulled away and returned to the stove to finish the rest of dinner.

“Well, I figured since you were coming over, and our little...project was probably going to take a while, I should make food.” You shrugged, placing two steaming plates on your coffee table and gesturing for him to come sit beside you on the couch. “It’s not Michelin star or anything…”

He shoveled up a bite of the garlic-roasted vegetables and groaned in satisfaction.

“It’s perfect,” he countered around the mouthful.

“You eat raw eggs, so I think the bar’s pretty low,” you countered jokingly, "but thank you.”

~

After you had eaten and cleaned up from dinner, you decided it was time to get down to business. You led him over to one corner of the broad, open space that served as your ‘office’ of sorts, drawing the thick curtains shut as you passed, just in case any of the neighbors were out smoking on the fire escape tonight. 

“So, you said, planting your hands on the work table dramatically and looking across to him. “Any initial thoughts?”

His eyes grew wide, like a panicked deer. He opened his mouth and then closed it again several times, but no words came out.

“Relax,” you said, smiling reassuringly, eyes sparkling. “It’s not like I expected you to do any homework. It was just a question. I have a few ideas, but we’re supposed to be partners, so I didn’t want to launch into them without giving you a shot first.”

‘Partners.’ He thought he liked the sound of that, but he still found himself wishing it was doing what he was used to, instead of this. It felt wrong, like he was going against everything he’d been taught. But then, he supposed he had been taught by a man so rigid and set in his ways that he would never have even considered that there might be other options. And the last thing he wanted to do was be like Reginald Hargreeves. Besides, it was a one for one deal, and there was still a chance to change your mind.

He smiled at you. “You lead, I’ll follow. For this one.”

“I like the sound of that,” you muttered, smiling back, before settling back into a more serious mode.

“Some oil tycoon’s private collection is being temporarily hosted and displayed at the art museum. It’s a pretty soft target at night, easy to get in and out. Shockingly minimal security in general, and paintings are easy to move,” you offered. 

Diego nodded vaguely, wanting to hear everything you set out before agreeing to anything.

“Or, there’s another place I’ve been staking out for a while. A warehouse. Owned by D.S. Umbrella Manufacturing Co. Nothing to do with actual umbrellas, or manufacturing from what I can tell.”

Diego flinched, but you didn’t notice, having turned around to pull out a file of information you had been gathering. 

“It’s all shipping and receiving. Mostly receiving. Some stuff I think is probably stolen antiques; I think I saw a couple guys opening crates of straight cash at one point, and there’s definitely stuff labeled with shit like ‘caution: explosive’ which usually means weapons or some kind of chemicals and either way is bad news. Those don’t stay in the warehouse long, and I don’t tend to mess with that shit anyway…” you trailed off, noticing Diego’s strange expression. “What? Why are you staring?”

“That…that’s my father’s company.”

“Wait what? Really?” you couldn’t help the shock on your face. 

You knew that Hargreeves was a very rich man but somehow it had never occurred to you that he might actually own anything, other than the massive Academy. And you supposed in theory the seven babies he had bought. You bit the inside of your cheek to distract yourself, cutting off that train of thought before it went to dark places.

“Do you know what specifically he’s got there?” you asked hopefully.

“No. I...sorry I don’t.”

“Nah, that’s alright. And you’re sure it’s his? Not just a similar name or coincidence?”

He shook his head. “No, that’s definitely Dad’s company.”

“All the better then,” you smiled wolfishly, all teeth. “Vengeance and helping people. If you want? I mean, I’m not going to make you do anything you’re not comfortable with. We could always hit the museum. Or start listing some other options...”

He hesitated a moment. Then he nodded resolutely. “Let’s do it.”

You grinned. Maybe this would turn out even better than you’d hoped. 

~

The two of you spent the next several hours working out the details of your plan, pouring over warehouse blueprints (that he didn’t ask where you’d gotten them from) and road maps, talking entry and exit strategies, rendezvous points, likely potential pitfalls, including the possibility that Hargreeves would send in his brother, Number One to try and stop you if he got wind of the break-in. Diego assured you that he was prepared to fight Luther if it came to it, and you frowned, heart clenching at his cold acquiescence to the idea. 

Exhausted, heads drooping and necks and shoulders aching, you finally decided to call it quits for the night. There was still more to go over, but you had time, and tonight you weren’t going to get anywhere useful with the fog that was settling into your minds. 

“I guess I should go,” he murmured as you both turned toward the door.

“Do you want to?” your face felt hot with a blush and you looked away from him as you asked. 

“What else would I do?” he stepped in front of you, turning your head to look at him again. 

You knew that he knew what you were offering, but he wanted to hear you say it anyway, to make sure the invitation was explicitly there. God, just when you thought he couldn’t get more perfect, he went and did a thing like that. 

You bit your lip, the words feeling heavy in your throat, every nerve suddenly hyper-aware.

“You could stay?” you offered, tilting your head slightly to one side. 

He cocked an eyebrow.

“I mean, I spent a week freeloading off you at your place. The least I can do is offer tonight, especially with how late it’s gotten. It’s dangerous out in the city alone at night you know.” You chuckled, trying to break the tension that crackled between you.

“Y/N…”

“It’s a really nice couch to sleep on,” you continued nervously. “I’ve fallen asleep on it before, pretty often actually when I come home and I’m just too tired. Or if I’m watching a movie or something.”

“Is that what you want?” his voice was soft and he was so close that his breath ghosted over your face.

“Is what?”

“For me to stay, and sleep on your couch?” He made sure you were making complete eye-contact with him, voice serious. “Be honest, and don’t just say something out of feeling like you’re obligated.”

“It’s not an obligation, Diego,” you assured him, hand cupping his face in counterpoint to the one he still had resting on your face. “I want you to stay.”

“On the couch?”

You shook your head. “Not unless you want to sleep on the couch.”

He opened his mouth to ask again if you were sure, to try and get you to say instead of dance around the invitation you were making. You rolled your eyes, kissing him fiercely. 

“Christ Diego,” you groaned against his lips. “I am trying to say I want you, as much of you as you’re willing to let me have.”

That seemed to finally be good enough for him, as he kissed you back with just as much ferocity as you had used. Your lips parted eagerly before he'd even had the chance to act, and your tongues danced together. The hand you had on his cheek slid back to grasp his short-cropped hair, raking your nails across his scalp in a way that made him shiver. Your other gripped tightly to his shoulder to hold yourself steady. He continued to cup your face, his thumb running slowly back and forth over your cheekbone in tender circles, his other arm wrapping around you to hold you close to him. 

Carefully, without breaking contact between you, you led him in a sort of dance, crossing the apartment, circling the edge of the dividing screens that formed your bed“room”, stepping over laundry piles, and finally tumbling backward onto the already rumpled sheets. 

Pulling back to give you both a moment to breathe, Diego shifted, taking off his boots and socks. He bit his lip, staring down at you, your hair splayed around you like a halo, lips reddened from his kisses, skin practically glowing in the dim light (or was that just you?). 

“What?” you asked teasingly. “Have I got something on my face?”

“You’re just…” he found himself at a loss for words, every one he could come up with seeming insufficient.

“Beautiful,” he finally breathed, brushing a finger reverently across your cheek once more, continuing on to trace up your temple before threading back, into your hair. 

“Diego,” you sighed, reaching again to draw him close, needy and wanting. 

He leaned down, tugging lightly on your hair, to expose your neck, placing teasing kisses along the column of your throat. You pressed your lips together to stifle a moan as his teeth grazed over the sensitive skin of your pulse point. You felt him smirk against your skin and had only a few seconds before he redoubled his efforts, biting down harder on the same spot and causing you to cry out. He glided his tongue over the mark he made and his free hand trailed over your stomach, fingers slipping beneath your shirt, shockingly cold against your heated skin. You gasped at the contact, melting into his touch and moving like a marionette for him as he released your hair and lifted your arms above your head to pull the offending garment off, tossing it aside. You thought you heard the clatter of something being knocked over by it, but you couldn’t be bothered to care as his lips reconnected with your own. 

The next kiss was languid and tender, his arms pulling you close, yours curling around his shoulders, fingers dancing mindless patterns over his bicep. You tugged unceremoniously at his own shirt which he was quick to shuck off. A shiver ran through you at the feel of his skin on yours.

His lips continued their journey downward and you arched into him as they found the swell of your breast. You couldn’t help the whine that slipped out of you, hand dropping from where you clung to him to clutch the sheets beside you as he sucked an obvious mark there, just above the line of your bra. 

Your chest heaved as you struggled to regain your breath or senses when he suddenly withdrew. Your face flushed hotly as you caught his eye and he flashed you a wink, swiftly kicking off his pants. He crawled back up the mattress to you and you pulled him into another kiss, your tongues tangling together almost immediately, as if you were made for it. 

As his hand slipped down to your waistband, deftly undoing the button there, you couldn’t help trembling under his touch, gasping when he slipped inside to run teasing fingers over the soft cotton of your panties. 

Suddenly, the reality of what was happening crashed over you like an icy wave and you felt like you were suffocating. It was too much. Everything was too much.

Planting your hands firmly, you pushed his shoulders to put some space between you.

“Diego, wait,” you said softly.

Immediately he froze. Seconds ticked by, somehow agonizingly slowly and impossibly fast all at once, before he moved again, drawing his hand away and shifting his weight off of you completely. He locked eyes with yours, fear and misery staining his face as you both sat up. You reached for him, and he flinched away. You let your hand drop.

“I-I’mmmm,” his breath hitched painfully and he closed his eyes. “I’mm s-sorry.”

“Diego,” you sighed. “There’s nothing to apologize for. Why would you think…”

Your brow creased in confusion and distress that he was so upset.

“I...w-ww-went too far o-or hurt you or…”

You couldn’t help the incredulous laugh that slipped out. 

“No you didn’t. You have been nothing but good to me, and you’ve done nothing that I didn’t absolutely want you to do. I’m just...not sure I’m ready to take things any further. Not tonight at least. Let’s just take it slow, okay?”

He nodded, finally opening his eyes, looking down at you again and letting you brush a light caress against his face. There was still some hesitation, like he didn’t quite believe that you weren’t hurt or upset, so you curled your fingers against the corner of his jaw, pulling him to meet you. Your lips moved slowly against his, watching carefully for any sign that he wanted to withdraw.

“I’m the one who should be sorry, if anything,” you said reluctantly.

“What?” his eyebrows knitted in confusion. “What for?”

“Leading you on?” you said, stating what you thought was obvious. 

He pressed his forehead to yours tenderly. “Sure, if you had done that.”

“I did. I mean what else would you call inviting you to stay the night like this and then...not following through…” you bit your lip, trying to look away from his earnest gaze.

“Y/N,” he said seriously. “Setting a boundary, or changing your mind, is not the same thing as leading me on.”

“But--”

He sighed heavily, the sound cutting you short.

“I’d be lying if I said there’s not a little disappointment. But you’re more important to me than sex. And I don’t want to do anything that you’re not comfortable with, that you don’t want just as much.”

You felt tears welling up in your eyes, relief and love mingling with embarrassment and guilt, no matter what he said. 

“I’d have even been fine if you really had, or do, ask me to sleep on the couch, Y/N.” He brushed away a stray tear that rolled down toward your chin. “As long as I still have you, in my life.”

“You only have to move to the couch if you want to,” you said, trying to fight down the small smile that threatened to break out on your face. “I’d like it if you stayed. We could maybe keep kissing? Or just, sleep together? Actual sleep…”

He chuckled. “Sleep sounds pretty nice. It is late. And I can’t remember the last time I got a full night.”

“Well in that case, make yourself comfortable,” you laughed, awkwardly extracting an arm to gesture at the rest of the bed. 

Diego returned the laugh and flopped over to the side, stretching out on his back as he settled in for sleep. Briefly he marveled at the softness of the way the mattress sank around him. It was like sleeping on a cloud compared to his lumpy old thing.

His eyes followed you as you moved around the space, shimmying out of your jeans and trading your bra for an overstretched and faded t-shirt, stamped with some university logo. He watched one hand reach behind you to quickly undo the clasp, the two sides practically springing away from each other when you did. You slid the garment off and for a brief moment you were naked, or nearly so - the soft smooth expanse of your skin even from behind making his pulse race with desire again - before you pulled the soft fabric down over your head, the hem trailing across the tops of your thighs, and hid yourself from view again.

You quickly flicked off the lights throughout the little studio apartment.

Any lingering thought, any regret that all he'd gotten was that brief peek, was immediately wiped from his mind as you padded back over to the bed and crawled into it with him. Curling up in almost a ball, you tucked yourself into the hollow of his side, head brushing against his arm as you nestled further down into the bedding, trying to get as comfortable as possible. You breathed in deeply, the scent of him - sharp and spicy and mingled with leather and the cleaning oil he used on his knives, so oft exposed that they had become a natural part of his smell - filling your lungs and spirit with comfort. 

“Goodnight Diego,” you whispered, breath tickling his skin.

He brought his arm down, drawing you closer against him.

“Goodnight.”

You brushed your lips across his cheek in a fleeting kiss that he thought he might have imagined before settling back in your original position. He smiled, the feeling of your warmth lulling him into the best sleep he’d had in ages.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

@mysterydisposition I think you said that you wanted to be tagged in new chapters?

[petersasteria]

Anger Issues - Harry Holland

Requested? Nope. I’ve been meaning to write this for so long and decided “fuck it” whether ppl will read it or not lmao what’s important is I finally release some decent content and I like it and that’s important.

Pairing: Harry x Reader

Words: 4,307

Masterlist 

* * * *

"Please wait here and the doctor will call you when it's your turn." the assistant tells you before leaving the waiting room. You look around and see two guys there. One of them had his hands in his pockets, his hood up, and his head nodding along to the music going through his earphones. In short, he looks like your average everyday mysterious emo guy from high school. The other guy looks the total opposite. He was like the guy everyone liked, but not exactly popular. He was on his phone, chuckling from time to time. He was wearing a blue sweater and some worn out jeans.

You sit across from them and the two guys look at you. You give them a tight-lipped smile. Emo guys rolled his eyes, but the guy next to him smiles back at you. It wasn't a fake smile either. It was a genuine smile.

'Seems like a nice guy.' you thought to yourself.

The less emo guy puts his phone in his pocket and starts up a conversation, "I've never seen you around here before and we're here every week. What-"

"Can you just shut the fuck up, Thomas? Why do you have to talk all the fucking time?? You're so fucking annoying. Maybe that's why your girlfriend left you for that other guy." emo guy snaps.

You and 'Thomas' look at him. While you were shocked at his mini outburst, 'Thomas' looked like he was used to it, though. "You don't have to speak like that whenever you're annoyed at someone, Harry." Thomas tells him in a soft and comforting voice.

"Wow. Look at you being a big brother for once!" Harry says sarcastically. "And the brother of the year award goes to...Thomas Stanley Holland! Give it up for him everybody!" He claps his hands. At this point, you and Thomas are beginning to feel uncomfortable. Especially you; you've never met these people before.

Thomas looks at you with a sorry expression, "I'm sorry about Harry. Anyway, I assume you heard my name already-"

"Of course she did. She has ears, dipshit." Harry mutters under his breath before taking his phone out of his pocket and scrolling through it.

"You can call me 'Tom'." Tom smiles, ignoring Harry. "What's your name?"

"Y/N." you tell him. Tom nods before looking at Harry then at you. He gets up from his seat and immediately sits next to you. You were a bit... scared. A stranger suddenly sits next to you after his brother shouts at him in anger isn't exactly an ideal way of meeting and getting to know someone.

Tom seems to notice your change of demeanor and chuckles, "I won't do anything, don't worry. It's just nice to see someone else in this place on a Saturday morning. It's usually just me and him and sometimes Sam, our brother, tags along too. But most of the time, just me and him."

You nod and feel yourself getting comfortable with Tom. "So, why are you alone? It's hard seeing a psychiatrist alone for the first time. I mean, it's not Harry's first time here, that's for sure. But if I were in your place, coming here with someone closest to me would make me feel less scared and nervous. Even if they don't go inside the room with you, it's nice to know that there's someone in the waiting room who's waiting for you and who's there for you every step of the way." Tom rambles.

"My parents dropped me off and then they said that they'll come back for me when I text them as soon as I finish here." you tell him truthfully.

"Well, they're shitty parents." Tom crosses his arms, "No offense."

"None taken." you chuckle. "They are shitty parents, though." Tom laughs and shakes his head.

The door opens and the current patient quickly in tears. The patient practically ran, not giving you a chance to see if it were a girl or boy. You look at the direction they came from and see the psychiatrist standing there. You look at the psychiatrist in fear.

You turn to Tom and whisper, "Why the fuck was that patient crying? Is this lady batshit crazy? Does she always make them cry??"

"Of course not." Tom whispers. "All I know about that last patient is that they're always here three times a week. I know, because I've asked before."

"Harry, you can come in now." the psychiatrist smiles at him. Harry rolls his eyes and stands up, getting his backpack (which needed to be washed) from the floor.

"You'll get through this today, Harry! I'm right here." Tom smiles at him, cheering him on as if Harry were to compete at something. Harry looks at him, gives him a fake smile, and the middle finger before entering the room, the 'click' of the door being closed was heard immediately after he went in.

"Now it's just you and me." Tom says. "What do you usually do here when you're alone waiting for Harry?" you ask curiously, obviously bored out of your mind.

"I just go on my phone. Sometimes I bring my homework and do it here. But since I don't have homework at the moment, I'm as free as a bird." Tom answers. "Speaking of phone, let's exchange numbers! It'll be so much fun having a new friend!"

Thomas Stanley Holland was too bubbly for your liking. But you exchanged numbers anyway. Even social media usernames.

After two hours of chatting with Tom, you come to realize that he's genuinely a nice and friendly guy. You really had fun talking to him. Harry emerges from the room with the same mysterious emo look on his face. "Let's go, Thomas."

"Hey champ! How was it?" Tom smiles.

"Are you fucking mocking me?" Harry asks, his temper slightly rising.

Judging by the little time you've known Harry, you've come to conclusion that he's in therapy for his anger issues. You notice that the little things seem to tick him off. The dude's a fucking time bomb.

"Harry, I was just asking nicely. I didn't mean to offend you. Please don't get mad at me." Tom says in that comforting and soft voice.

An outsider would think that they're complete strangers who are fighting, because at this point, it's hard to believe that they're siblings.

"I wouldn't have gotten mad if you just followed me when I said that we should go home. I wouldn't have gotten mad if you didn't open your fucking mouth." Harry said in sort of a Draco Malfoy tone.

Tom looks at you and quietly says, "I'll text you." He stands up and follows his brother on his way out.

"Y/N, it's your turn." the psychiatrist says.

"Welp, here goes nothing." you say to yourself before going in the room and closing the door.

"Hello Y/N. I'm Dr. Joanne Moore. But you can call me Joanne, so that it's less intimidating." Joanne smiles. "Please take a seat and make yourself comfortable."

Joanne motions for you to sit on the couch while she sits across from you on the spinning office chair everyone loves. You do as she says and you let yourself relax as your gaze wanders around the room. The room was neither small nor large and the only light source was the sun shining outside; its rays coming through the window.

"I understand that you're new here. Where are you from?" Joanne asks.

"New York." you reply. Joanne hums and nods, "Why did you move here?"

"My father is English and my mother is American. My mom told my dad that maybe it'd be best to move to a new environment. She's basically sick of New York. Around the time she said that, my dad got offered a new job here with a salary higher than what he was paid back home. Then, the rest is history." you respond. You've been repeating the same response to your neighbors and to everyone you meet, so you completely memorize it like the back of your hand. You can say shit in your sleep.

"I see. Welcome to London." Joanne smiles. You mutter a small 'thank you' before leaning back on the couch.

"Would you like to tell me why you're here?" Joanne asks.

"I thought you'd never ask." you lightly chuckle.

-

"Y/N, is that you?!" you hear a familiar voice from your left side. You turn your head and see Tom with a smile on his face, "Oh my god, it is you! I didn't know we had the same school. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Um, I didn't think it was necessary?" your answer came out more like a question.

"Of course, it's necessary. We're best friends now!" Tom grins. He looks behind him and says, "Guys, come here!" A group of guys walk in your direction with Harry following behind them.

"Guys, this is Y/N the girl from therapy." Tom introduces. "Y/N, this is the gang: Harrison, Sam, Jacob, and of course you know Harry."

"Hi everyone." you smile politely.

"Hey you don't have an accent too!" Jacob smiles. "I'm from Hawaii. What about you?"

"New York." you smile proudly. You were beginning to feel homesick and talking about New York would make you feel much better.

"That's so awesome! I've been there once. It was family vacation and I had so much fun there! Maybe there was a slight chance we bumped into each other while I was there or something." Jacob tells.

"Are we going to class or are we going to stand here all day while Jacob tells his New York escapade?" a voice from the back startles everyone even though they knew who it belonged to. The five of you look at Harry and mutter apologies to which Harry replied with "whatever" and rolling his eyes before leaving the group.

"My twin has left, lady and gentlemen." Sam says to all of you.

"Wait, he's your twin?" you ask in shock.

"Yup." Sam confirms. "Hard to take in, right?"

You nod in agreement. "Let's go to class. I don't want to be late on my first day." you chuckle nervously.

"You'll be fine! We'll probably have classes with you." Harrison says, calming your nerves a bit. "Good luck if you have a class with Harry, though. He's hard to work with. He kind of wants to do his own thing, but he helps even though he's like that."

Harrison's heads up about Harry made you not want to share a class with him.

Luck wasn't on your side, however. As soon as you enter your first class, which is history, the only empty seat was next to Harry. You take a deep breath before walking to the empty seat next to him.

"Oh great." Harry mumbles. Understanding his issues, you bite back a reply and just take in everything that's happening. Everyone is talking to each other except for you and Harry despite the fact that you know each other. To be fair, you aren't close with him. You're closer with Tom, so you didn't know what Harry liked to talk about.

Just then, the teacher arrives and everyone went to their proper seats. The teacher looked like she was in her mid 30s. She looked nice.

"Before we start, we have a new student from New York." she smiles at you. "Please, introduce yourself to everyone."

Harry turns to you and sees your shocked face. Upon seeing that, he chuckles and shakes his head, "Just get it over with." Hearing Harry being normal sounded so foreign to you, but you took his advice and went on to introduce yourself.

"You don't have to stay here in front. Just stand up and tell us about yourself." the teacher says.

"Okay, um, my name is Y/N Y/L/N and I'm from New York. I just moved here, like, a week ago. So yeah...that's it I guess." you awkwardly say and you sit down.

"Welcome Y/N! I hope you enjoy your stay. My name is Mrs. Smith and I'll be your history teacher." Mrs. Smith says. "Speaking of history, let's get started."

Mrs. Smith began to discuss for the rest of the time. Five minutes before the class ends, Mrs. Smith tells everyone that they'll have a project that'll be done in pairs. You didn't know anyone in class except for Harry and Harrison's warning is at the back of your head. So to say that you didn't know what to do would be an understatement.

"I already have a list of pairs and I'll dictate it." Mrs. Smith says.

'Thank god.' you mutter under your breath.

'Fucking hell.' Harry rolls his eyes.

"Y/N you'll be paired with Harry." Mrs. Smith smiles, before continuing. You look at Harry and he looks at you unimpressed.

"I don't usually allow anyone to work with me, but since you're new and you're practically best friends with my brother, I'll give you a chance. That's as far as I can go with being nice to someone." Harry tells you. You just nod, still kind of intimidated by him. "Also," he says again, "back the fuck off when we're out together. I don't like it when people invade my space." Harry fakes a smile and puts his stuff in his bag. You just stay quiet and do the same.

When Mrs. Smith dismisses the class, Harry immediately left. Of course, you followed. You didn't want to be alone in a room with people you didn't know. You'd much rather be stuck with Tom even though he talks too much and is too bubbly. You'd also prefer if you were stuck with Harry and even though he gets angry all the time and he hardly says anything to you, at least he's someone you know.

As soon as you leave the room, Tom and the rest were there to greet you. "Hey!!!" they all greet cheerfully.

"Oh my god what the fuck did I get myself into?" you ask yourself, putting on a smile for them nonetheless.

"Congrats! You survived your first class in your new school." Jacob says. "Are you ready to go through the rest of the day?"

"As ready as I'll ever be." you respond. It wasn't even at least half of the day and you were already tired. Tom and his friends seem to have a lot of energy and seeing them really energized makes you tired.

-

Saturday comes around again and you're back at therapy. You walk in the waiting room and see Harry there. Now, it's awkward. Like last week, you sit across from Harry and begin to mind your own business. 'He did say "back the fuck off", right?' you think to yourself.

"Tom has a dentist appointment in case you're wondering." Harry's voice startles you. You look up from your phone and see him already looking at you. "It's just me today. Sam is at his part time job and I don't want to bring my youngest brother, Paddy to this depressing place. I don't want him to end up mentally messed up. He doesn't deserve that."

How the fuck are you going to respond to that?

"Oh, I see." you says, still not sure what to reply. "Thanks for telling me, I guess."

"What'll you do after this?" Harry asks curiously.

"I'll probably just walk around or go sight seeing. My parents are on a business trip and all my siblings have their own lives now, because they're older than me." you tell him truthfully. He nods and says, "I have nothing going on at my place at the moment and I want to get away."

You shrug, "Go ahead, then. No one's stopping you."

Harry just stares at you and it's beginning to freak you out, because you don't know if he's going to burst or not. Finally, after almost a minute of silence and staring at each other Harry speaks up, "Do you have money on you?"

"Excuse me?"

Harry rolls his eyes, "Do you have cash right now? I have some stashed in my backpack right now."

"Um, is that even importa-"

"Just answer the fucking question, Becky." Harry says, clearly starting to get annoyed. "Yeah, I do. Why does it matter?" you gulp.

"Good." Harry says. "We'll talk later after your session. It's my turn now." As if on cue, the door opens and the patient from last week quickly runs past you and Harry. He stands up, grabs his backpack and enters the room.

To say you were confused was an understatement. Why was he suddenly talking to you? You decided to text Tom about it.

To: Tom

Hey man hope the dentist thing is going well for u. Harry just said the weirdest shit and idk what to say or feel. Send help xo

You didn't expect a reply, so you went on Instagram and just scrolled through it until it was your turn.

-

After your session, you were surprised to see Harry waiting for you. He looks up from his phone, takes out one of his earphones and asks, "Ready to go? I'm starving." You just nod and off you two went.

Both of you end up at a sandwich shop far from the building. You both eat in silence and it's beginning to feel awkward; for you at least. Harry seemed fine.

"Let's leave London." Harry says all of a sudden, making you choke on your sandwich. "Jesus, are you okay?" he asks with no concern, whatsoever. He's more worried about both of you causing a scene.

You finally calm down and nod, "Now I'm okay. Where are we going?"

Harry shrugs, "Anywhere we set our mind to. I haven't been outside of London for years. Maybe we could go somewhere to experience a new environment or whatever."

"...London is my new environment." you explain to him.

"I know, dipshit." Harry rolls his eyes, "but you wanted to go sight seeing, don't you?"

"Yeah, around London not outside London."

"What's wrong with going outside of London?!"

"Why're you pushing for us to go outside of London?!" you rebutt.

"BECAUSE I HATE THIS PLACE!!" Harry yells causing everyone in the shop to look at both of you. You flinch at his words and you didn't know what to say. Harry angrily stands up, kicks the chair, and leaves the shop. All of the customers and employees look at you with pity.

"Poor thing." one customer said.

"Wow, worst boyfriend of the year award goes to that guy." the other said.

You gather yours and Harry's belongings and run out of the shop, hoping you're not too late to catch Harry. After looking left and right, you see him standing not too far away and you approach him.

"Hey," you say softly, "you know what? Let's go outside London." You decided that maybe Harry hasn't been getting what he wanted that's why he's always angry, so you'll give him a chance. You also started using the same tactic as Tom: speaking softly which is quite difficult and tiring, but if Tom can do it, so can you.

Harry looks at you and nods. Without saying a word, he grabs his bag from you and walks to the train station. Not wanting to get lost on your second week in London, you rush to follow him before you lose him in the crowd.

-

"So where are we?" you ask Harry.

"Dorset." Harry responds. "It's probably my favorite place. I don't know why, but it calms me down. I usually go here alone, but I don't want to be alone at the moment." You nod, you understand the feeling.

You and Harry walk around and he shows you the different spots he likes to stay and relax at and somehow, both of you end up on top of a hill. The view was remarkable. It was different from your view in New York and different from your view in your room back in London. This view gave you peace and you're starting to understand why Harry likes it there so much.

You both sit on the grass and sit in silence. Taking in the smell of the sea while your hair was following in the direction the wind is blowing. "How long do you usually stay here?" you ask Harry almost in a whisper.

"Until it gets dark." Harry responds. "Sometimes I don't go home at all. Not like anyone would care anyway. It's boring back at home to the point where it doesn't feel like home anymore. Back in London I just live in a house with three brothers, a set of parents, and a dog named Tessa. Being with them doesn't feel like home."

You nod, "Is that why you go to therapy?" You knew it wasn't your business to ask, but he's starting open up to you about the things he's feeling.

"I think you already know why I go to therapy. I had an episode at the sandwich shop." Harry laughs bitterly. "Maybe the question should be asking me is how I ended up like this."

"I wasn't always like this, you know. Believe it or not, I was like Tom." Harry admits. You didn't say anything, though. You wanted to, but you figured he needed to let it all out.

"It happened two years ago. Kevin, my best friend, and I were walking home from school. We didn't know the bullies from school followed us, but when we noticed them it was too late. For some reason, I was an easy target. So they took my money and taunted me and all that shit. I was used to it, but Kevin had enough. He punched one of the bullies and soon, they were nearly killing each other. I tried to stop them, but two of them held me back while I watched how the 'leader' of the group punched the life out of Kevin. Maybe someone saw what was happening, because the police came. The 'leader' threw one last punch and pushed Kevin before running. The two guys who held me back pushed me forward and ran away too." Harry tells you, his voice becoming shaky.

"I immediately went to check on Kevin and panicked when I didn't feel a pulse. One of the policemen called an ambulance. Then we arrived at the hospital and he," Harry takes a deep breath, tears falling freely down his cheeks, "he was dead on arrival. I guess he got pushed really hard and his head collided on the concrete with so much force. Lethal damage."

"Ever since then, I never forgave myself. I could've done something; anything. But I was just there, watching as my best friend die right in front me." Harry sniffs. "I can't help, but blame myself. He intervened to save me. If I only knew that saving me would lead to his death, I wouldn't have let him. I would've just gave the bullies what they wanted so they can leave him alone. He was the only one who understood me and he knew my secrets."

"I lived with that guilt every day ever since that happened. I could never forgive myself. My family tried to help me move on, but I couldn't. Every time they helped, I pushed them away. Then I started to get irritated with everything they did, like, why can't they leave me the fuck alone?! My parents decided it would be best for me to go to therapy seeing as I won't let them help me. Tom went with me the first time, because I was irritated with him the most. He kept bugging me. And of course, up to this day he still accompanies me." Harry says, wiping his tears.

"So," Harry chuckles lightly, "that's my story. What's yours?"

You chuckle too, "There's nothing special about it, really. My parents just think that there's something wrong with me, but that's not true. At least I think it's not true." Harry just nods for you to continue.

"I'm the youngest in my family. I have three older siblings and they're all married now. My parents are obviously so happy. In fact, they're so happy that they forget about me...all the time. Every time we have this little family lunch or dinner, my parents always ask about how my siblings are doing and shit like that. I've tried, you know? I've tried to push myself to talk to them, but whenever I do, my parents dismiss me and they tell me they're busy or they tell me to shut up, because one of my siblings are talking and it'd be rude to interrupt. I got tired and I just didn't try anymore." you tell him.

"It sucks, man. I have no one to turn to when things get tough. I have no one to be excited for me whenever I have good news. I feel so alone. I only had three friends back in New York and to be honest with you, they weren't even near the level of becoming my best friends. Sure, we hung out and stuff, but I was always their last choice to hang out with. If everyone else is busy, they call me and my stupid ass would answer immediately. Thank god we moved here. New environment is good." you sigh. "I'm really glad I met you guys, though. Tom talks too much, but he's alright. I now have one best friend; how cool is that!"

Harry laughs lightly, "Well, now you have two."

You look at him and give him a small smile, "Are you sure? I'm no Kevin, but I'll try."

"I don't need a new Kevin. Just be you." Harry says, nudging you slightly. "It's nearly getting dark. Should we head back?"

"Sure." you smile. Both of you stood up and grabbed your things before leaving. From that moment on, something told you that you wouldn't be alone anymore and it felt great to finally have someone by your side.

* * * *

Feedback please?

Tagging my mutuals: @sweetdespairbarnes @myblueleatherbag @fanficparker @tommysparker @lcvelyparkers + @justasmisunderstoodasloki (bc this person is nice to me sksks)

Want to contact me? 

[fatebreaking-a]

// @regina-tenebris / Don’t ask what modern AU this is, I don’t know. I just went off apparently.

------------

Emilia’s eyes trail up, up, up - higher still to the titan of a woman who stands a full 40 centimeters over her. It annoys her somewhat, perhaps more because of who it is than her height.

“Do you have business with me or do you intend to keep staring?” She drawls out, her patience especially thin with the other woman. Perhaps due to how they had met, perhaps due to all that came after... She sighs and shakes her head.

Sona stares down at her with a bemused, nonplussed look. Irritation swells in Emilia at the sight before she huffs and turns around, crossing her arms. That woman always seemed to get under her skin, right from the first. “If it’s nothing, then I’ll get going.”

She can’t help but remember all that had brought them to this point.

-------------------------------------------

“Valet, park the car.” The driver of her car had called out to a tall woman standing at the receiving area, dressed in a vest and slacks of some kind. Teal hair? Is that some sort of fashion statement? 

“Are you deaf? Here, keys.” Emilia had stepped out of the car at this point to see the exchange, marveling somewhat at the beanpole woman who simply shrugged and shook her head. Strange woman, but she had other business at this company.

--------------------------------------------

“You? Aren’t you the...” Once again, she had run into the beanpole woman, but in a rather unexpected place. Emilia’s eyes narrow as she steps into the orphanage, step by step with this strange woman. Especially that unfrazzled look of calm, it was borderline unnerving how different her sense of poise was from Emilia’s. It was like watching the edge of the ocean, watching things was over her again and again... Strange woman. And worse, this beanpole lady was only raising an eyebrow in response.

“The valet from PeraPera Corp.” The ‘valet’ smiles somewhat bewitchingly at that, then shakes her head in refusal. What’s with that... She clearly took my car. And she had walked out from inside the company... Hmph. Emilia’s thoughts stop short as the excited chirp of children fills her ears. This was what she was here for anyway. Not some strange lady.

“Big sis LeBlanc!” Yes, that sounded good. Big sis LeBlanc. A somewhat reserved smile blooms on LeBlanc’s face as a few children run up to her, waving to the tall lady as well. The beanpole offers them a small wave of her hand, then turns her attention to the child who was tugging at her long sleeves.

“Hello to you as well. Do you kids know that woman?”

“Oh, she’s Auntie Asteria!” ‘Auntie’? Emilia stares back at the woman, raising an eyebrow. Perhaps even more surprising is the cry for ‘lift, lift, lift!’ from a few children as that beanpole ‘Asteria’ lifts up four children at once and carts them around. She can’t help but stare at that. She hides her muscles well underneath the loose clothes and long sleeves, huh? Most people would struggle to lift even one person...

-------------------------------------------

“You’re certain no one called ‘Asteria’ works in this company?”

“Y-Yes, Chairwoman. We don’t have anyone like that here.” She lets out a little huff and turns around, shaking her head. So was Asteria lying to those kids? Why? It wasn’t as though she needed to act big... Well, she hadn’t heard it from the horse’s mouth, but rather what the kids were saying. 

“Chairwoman LeBlanc!” Some sniveling man was rushing behind her as she walked through the company. Not hers, though they were in talks of a partnership. She waves him off and continues to meander until she at last reaches a strange hallway with one door on one side and plenty of doors on the other. Faintly, the sound of music plays from inside.

‘For entrance, please text XXXXXXX’ Chairwoman Leblanc scoffs at that and tries the doorknob. Locked. 

“Open this.”

“Uh-”

“If I’m to do business with this company of yours, I’d like to know if you have any strange rumors floating about or wastes of money. This certainly qualifies.”

“Y-Yes, very well.” The door unlocks slowly, revealing a large space covered wall to wall in sound proofing. It’s necessary, as music is floating throughout, and all sorts of paraphernalia is placed throughout. A desk, an easel, a music stand, a fold-out couch... and typing away, hard at work, is...

“Sona? That’s your name?” ‘Sona, Consultant? Does a consultant get this kind of office?’ Sona turns her head up and puts her laptop to the side, standing and dipping her head in greeting. She’s dressed in some weird fashion again today, some sort of long embroidered robe... The longer she looked at this situation, the more she felt that this was unnatural.

And Emilia hated any secrets that didn’t belong to her.

--------------------------------------------

“I apologize, for last time. I didn’t know about your condition.” Emilia stares up at the beanpole - no, at Sona - as a grim frown floats across her face. Even she could recognize impropriety, and she had gone a little too far. Sona just returns that same smile as always, nodding in acceptance, as they walk through the doors of the orphanage and the squeal of children can be heard.

“Son-” Emilia stops mid-sentence as Sona shoots her a surprising glare and shakes her head. “Asteria.” Sona’s face immediately relaxes as she nods and turns her head towards the children screaming ‘ups, ups, ups’ and immediately lifts them up, swinging the children around playfully.

You want to hide it that badly? Who are you?

------------------------------------------

“This doesn’t make sense. Are these numbers correct?” Emilia was looking over payroll documents she absolutely had no right to have, squinting. That woman, ‘Sona Buvelle’... Had been around since the founding of the company? She was apparently the seventh employee, and her pay had steadily risen for a few years at the start. From a modest starting salary to something larger and larger, as if she were in an executive role...

And then her pay suddenly shrunk to a fraction and had stayed the same for years.  ‘That doesn’t happen. And if it does, people don’t... stick around. What the hell is this?’ It wasn’t an unlivable wage, certainly above poverty, but... Emilia flips through the pages again. She had seen the woman throughout the company, doing this and that, even offering advice or doing technical work. Whether in the creative departments, publicity, engineering... She was everywhere and yet she was the lowest paid person in the company? Emilia’s jaw tightens as she flips through the files again, eyes narrowing.

‘ Who the hell are you... ‘

-------------------------------------------

“I figured it out. You’re-”  Emila’s abruptly stops as she’s pulled off the sidewalk roughly, right into Sona’s arms as they both crash backwards. As a car hits the brakes and the driver rushes out to check on them both, Emilia extricates herself from Sona’s arms and huffs. Stupidly nice.

“President Buvelle.” On one side was a woman rushing up, apologizing furiously, and on the other was a woman sitting down with her tongue sticking out slightly and a ‘you got me’ expression on her face.

“You have to hide it that badly?” It all made sense now. Why all the junior staff thought Sona was just a ‘really nice lady’ who had been there a long time, like some sort of mystery benefactor. And why all the senior staff hesitated when talking about her, as if they knew something, but it was in the past. And why, of all things, when she had spoken to Swain about this new mystery lady, he had something as cryptic as ‘Ah yes, I’d been to one of her shows...’ and then said nothing else. Asshole.

Straightening herself up and turning to deal with the nervous looking driver, Emilia shakes her head. She’d just have to deal with this particular mystery later. There had to be a reason, an explanation for this unnatural behavior from such an eccentric president. The answer never came. Sona never stopped being charming, underpaid, and generous. Later became weeks, then months, and without warning, winter arrived.

--------------------------------------------

“Hmph.” It was the strangest thing, dealing with Sona now that the business dealings between their companies finished. Normally that would be the end of it, but they had both been coming to the orphanage before, and would probably continue even after. She still didn’t know what to make of the woman, or what sort of relationship they even had. Business rivals? Friends? Coworkers? And that beanpole woman never got any less irritating, letting every incident wash over her like a wave. It was as if she was intentionally trying to throw Emilia off...

Shivering slightly, Emilia closes her eyes and huffs. At the same time, a wool hat is pushed onto her head, pulled just short of her eyes. With a beanie now snugly on her face, Emilia turns around, preparing all manner of verbal counterattack. It was a warm beanie though. “And? Is this a Snowdown gift? Thank you, but I don’t-” Have anything for you, she had meant to say, but her voice dies in her throat as her cold hands are wrapped in warm ones and a soft, hot breath warms up her fingers. Sona’s expression is exceedingly warm as she continues to warm LeBlanc’s hands, smiling faintly.

"You...” What a strange woman. That was the only thing Emilia could say for sure about the person in front of her.

“You really are strange. But I don’t hate that.”

[artificialqueens]

You're All I Want (for Christmas), Part 2 (Branjie) - Kiki

A/N: Apologies in advance for all the sadness in this lol but the cute fluffy Christmas vibes will come back in the next (and final) part! Hope you enjoy!

Summary: A classic Christmas past, present and future fic. Brooke and Vanessa hit a major milestone in their relationship but it doesn’t take long for it all to come tumbling down around them. 

2nd January 2019:

Brooke couldn’t believe her luck when she thought about how amazing the holiday season had been for her. 2018 had been the best year of Brooke’s life simply because that was when she met Vanessa and she couldn’t wait to see what 2019 had in store for them. Christmas had been amazing, they got to spend the entire day relaxing together and it was absolutely perfect. Then New Years Eve had come around and all of their relaxing times were officially over.

Detox had insisted they all went out to a massive party and while Brooke was reluctant (she had originally wanted to spend the evening with only Vanessa, not a bunch of strangers), they ended up having an amazing night. The next day, however, was not so amazing…simply because Brooke couldn’t handle alcohol like she used to.

Thankfully this morning she had woken up with her headache gone and her stomach settled. Which was good because she had an idea that had been on her mind ever since Vanessa gave her the promise ring. She wanted to buy an engagement ring for Vanessa.

As she sat on the subway on her way to the jewellery store she had chosen, she held her ring that was on the necklace in her hand. She found herself doing that a lot lately if Vanessa wasn’t around, it made her feel close to her and like Vanessa was always with her. It also brought her so much joy knowing that she would be wearing that exact ring when they got engaged. It was just a massive symbol of happiness and joy to her.

She knew that she couldn’t have a ring and not get Vanessa one. She also knew that throughout their relationship so far, she had always had it in her mind that she would be the one to propose. Even if they didn’t get engaged for a long time, she wanted to have the ring ready for whenever it felt like the right moment. She knew exactly what type of ring Vanessa would like, she had even called Vanessa’s mom and told her about her plan of buying the ring now and Mrs Mateo was thrilled about it. The only tricky part would be hiding the ring from Vanessa.

Brooke was usually very strict with her money. She didn’t like to spend a lot of it on herself, especially if it was on something that she didn’t desperately need. But there was something about Vanessa that made her want to spoil her and give her the best of everything. Thankfully, earning a lawyer’s salary allowed her to do that. When the cashier at the store told her the price of the ring, she didn’t even bat an eyelid. She just handed over her card and immediately started thinking of when she would actually propose. That was the most important thing…and there was no amount of money in the world that would make Brooke feel happier than she did when she thought about Vanessa.

—

12th March 2019:

It was exactly one year since Brooke and Vanessa had met. Detox’s birthday party last year had been something Brooke didn’t want to attend but was arguably one of the most important days of her life. And what were they doing to celebrate Detox’s birthday and to acknowledge knowing each other for an entire year? Going back to the exact same club that Detox had held her party at last year.

Considering Vanessa and Brooke Lynn had started dating pretty much immediately after meeting, it was coming up on their one-year anniversary which made the night all the more special for Vanessa. She loved anniversaries and birthdays (really any kind of event that celebrated something) and this was the perfect kind of party for her to celebrate her best friends’ birthday and her own relationship. She couldn’t wait. She had even asked Brooke if they could wear the same outfits as they did last year to properly recreate the night but Brooke had to firmly shut that idea down.

Detox had even managed to reserve the same booth in the club for her and her friends and they were overwhelmed by the nostalgia. Some of the group were sitting round the table sipping champagne (Detox was of course at the bar ordering shots) and talking about last year.

Nina was blushing remembering how drunk she had gotten. One year later and she was still extremely embarrassed about what had happened that night. Especially since everybody at the table was teasing her about it. After making fun of Nina for about ten minutes, the topic of conversation shifted to Brooke and Vanessa’s relationship, which delighted both of the girls. They both loved to talk about the other, their eyes lighting up in excitement anytime they got the opportunity to tell people stories about each other or quirky habits that the other one had. Detox had sworn that she had never seen Brooke as happy as she was when she was talking about Vanessa. She loved that both of her friends were so happy, even though she would never let them know that.

“At least you won’t have to leave and bring me home this year, Brooke!” Nina joked, earning a laugh from the rest of the table.

“No, she’ll be bringing me home this year instead.” Vanessa replied in a flirtatious tone and turned her head to the left where Brooke was sitting and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. The group laughed at Vanessa’s reply to Nina whereas Detox returned from the bar rolling her eyes at the couple. She was holding a tray of shots in her hand and Brooke was sure there was enough for everybody at the table to have at least four shots each. The only thing on Vanessa’s mind was excitement as she took her first shot, whereas the only thing Brooke could think about was how the hell Detox could afford this much alcohol.

Thirty minutes later, all of the shots were gone and Vanessa was onto her second vodka and cranberry. It was clear that Vanessa was going to be Detox’s favourite person to party with that night because Vanessa was already extremely tipsy and there was no way of stopping her once she got in this state. Brooke knew this was going to end badly.

Three hours later, Vanessa and Detox were unable to stand properly. They had spent so much time on the dancefloor drinking whatever alcohol they could get their hands on and Brooke could do nothing but laugh at the state that her girlfriend was in.

Brooke had to pick the shorter girl up and carry her to the uber that was waiting outside, praying that she wouldn’t vomit on their short ride home. Vanessa had said earlier that Brooke would end up bringing her home, but Brooke didn’t think this was the way that Vanessa had meant it.

—

29th July 2019:

Brooke was laying out on a towel, soaking up as much of the heat from the sun in Mexico that her pale skin would allow her to. It was her first ever vacation that she had taken with a girlfriend and she was so happy that girlfriend was Vanessa. There was no one else she would’ve wanted to experience this with. As she looked to the left, she lay eyes on her girlfriend sleeping on a sun lounger and in that moment, she knew. Tonight was going to be the night that she finally proposed to Vanessa. 

Brooke had booked a candlelit dinner on a private area of the beach with the hotel’s concierge and she knew Vanessa would love it. It was the perfect level of intimacy and romance that Vanessa would appreciate. The only thing that wasn’t perfect was how nervous Brooke was feeling.

Realistically, she knew Vanessa would say yes. There were no doubts about that in Brooke’s mind. But she couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed at how much this proposal meant to her. Vanessa was her everything. She knew that Vanessa was too good for her and the fact that she was willing to settle for someone like Brooke absolutely blew her mind. But she had to be thankful and keep reminding herself that Vanessa loved her and she knew how lucky she was to have Vanessa be in love with her.

They were sitting at their table drinking red wine and just chatting about random when things when suddenly, Brooke couldn’t hold it in anymore. She was planning to propose just after they had finished their dessert but she couldn’t keep it in. She had to do it now. Brooke took Vanessa’s hand in hers and Vanessa stopped talking and looked up at Brooke.

“You okay, B?” Vanessa asked. She was concerned…her girlfriend looked like she was about to explode from anxiety.

“I need to tell you something.”

“Okay…go ahead.” Vanessa replied, already preparing herself for the worst.

“I…Vanessa, I love you so much. This past year has been the best year of my entire life and its all because of you. I don’t know how I lived 26 years without you in my life because now that I have you in my life, I know I never want you to not be a part of it. I know that you would do absolutely anything for me because that’s just the kind of person you are… you’re so kind, you’re caring, you’re everything that is good in this world and I don’t want to ever be without you. So, Nessa, will you please stay by my side forever? Will you marry me?” Brooke had taken the ring out of her pocket and was down on one knee so swiftly that Vanessa couldn’t believe it. She was sobbing after Brooke had only said one sentence. She was crying so much that she wasn’t able to get her words out, but eventually, she did.

“Yes, I’ll marry you!” Brooke cried as she wrapped her arms around Vanessa’s neck and they held each other close. They sobbed and said “I love you” about a hundred times before calming themselves down and feeling an overwhelming sense of happiness and excitement about what had just happened.

Brooke took the ring out of the box and placed it on Vanessa’s finger and she immediately wanted to cry about it again.

“Jesus Christ, B…it’s so beautiful.” Vanessa whispered in awe, staring at the diamond on her finger. Brooke smiled and was so pleased that Vanessa liked the ring she had chosen. Vanessa reached up to Brooke’s neck and took the necklace holding her engagement ring off of her. She slid the ring off of it and Brooke was so excited to finally have it on her finger. That ring has provided her with so much comfort over the last few months and she knew it would be on her finger for the rest of her life. She couldn’t wait to wear it forever.

—

24th September 2019:

Vanessa got home from work at 6pm to an empty apartment. She shouldn’t be surprised. Brooke had recently gotten a promotion and wasn’t at home as often as she used to be. She was always working late, working through lunch and sometimes even working the weekends.

Vanessa was happy for her. She knew how much that promotion had meant to her fiancé, how long she had been waiting for it and how much she had deserved it. But to Vanessa, it felt like ever since they got engaged, she had barely seen Brooke. She felt like the last time she had Brooke’s full, undivided attention was when they were on vacation in Mexico when Brooke didn’t have to worry about work deadlines or impressing her bosses. Vanessa wished she could have that Brooke back.

Brooke arrived home at nine thirty that night which was the earliest she had been home all week. Vanessa was sitting on the couch with Thackery watching a reality show that she was currently obsessed with. Brooke walked straight through to the kitchen without even saying hello to her girlfriend and Vanessa didn’t like that.

“Uh, hey? I still exist, I can’t even get a ‘hello’ from you?” Vanessa said angrily while Thackery broke her trust and ran over to Brooke to greet her. Brooke was in the process of heating up some leftovers in the microwave and scooped Thackery up as soon as he reached her.

“I’m so sorry, babe, hi! I haven’t eaten since breakfast, I’m sorry, I’m starved.” Brooke said as she gave Thackery a kiss on the forehead.

“Even the damn cat gets more attention from you than I do.” Vanessa replied grumpily as she turned the volume up on the show she was watching so she wouldn’t have to listen to Brooke.

“What was that?” Brooke asked, walking over to where Vanessa was sitting on the couch.

“Nothing.”

“It’s not nothing, are you mad at me?,” Brooke arched her eyebrow and placed Thackery on his bed before sitting down beside Vanessa. Vanessa paused her show in annoyance and rolled her eyes at her girlfriend.

“Well, considering this is probably the longest you’ve been at home in months, then yeah…I guess you could say I’m mad at you.”

“Come on, V, you know that’s not true!”

“It is! Ever since you got your promotion I never see you anymore! We’re supposed to be engaged and I feel like I haven’t seen you properly in months.” Vanessa said with a hurt tone to her voice, she had wanted to bring this up in a responsible and calm way but she already didn’t like the path that this conversation was heading down.

“Really? You know that’s not my fault, Nessa! I can’t help it if I’m busier now!” Brooke could feel herself getting more defensive than she should be but she couldn’t help it. She had worked her ass of for that promotion and was extremely proud of herself for getting it. if Vanessa couldn’t see that, then that was on her.

“I know that, B…but it’s not normal for someone to work that much. Especially if they’ve got a fiancé. It’s been almost two months now since you proposed to me and we haven’t even discussed anything about the wedding.” A tear rolled down Vanessa’s face as she thought about her dream wedding that was just waiting for Brooke to start planning it with her. All she wanted was to live her life with Brooke by her side and this version of Brooke was starting to not be enough for her.

“Look, I’ll take the weekend off, okay? We can spend some time together then and I’ll try be less busy. Is that okay?” Brooke asked and Vanessa could tell it was just a way of trying to make her calm down. But it was the best she was going to get now.

“Yeah, that’s great, B.” Vanessa replied as she turned back on the show she was watching. Brooke ate her food at table alone and went straight to bed. When Vanessa joined her in the bedroom, she could tell Brooke wasn’t asleep but decided not to say anything. As her head hit her pillow, she realised this was the first night she had gone to bed without hearing Brooke say “I love you” to her in a very long time.

—

29th October 2019:

Vanessa was late. She had promised to have dinner cooked for Brooke at 8pm that night because they were making more of an effort to try and spend their evenings together but Vanessa had a meeting that ran late which consequently, made Vanessa arrive home later than she would have liked.

She opened the door to their apartment and noticed that all of the lights weren’t turned on and Thackery’s food and water bowls were empty. Brooke wasn’t even home yet either. With an eye roll, Vanessa took off her coat and immediately went to go feed Thackery his dinner.

As she was stirring the rice that she was having for dinner that night, Vanessa’s mind drifted back to the meeting she had earlier that day. Her boss had offered her a promotion where Vanessa would essentially be running an entire department of the fashion company she worked for. She’d be in charge of the designers whilst also approving and creating her own designs for the company’s collection. Essentially, it was her dream job. The only problem was, the job required her to move to Chicago.

With a sigh, she dished up her dinner and began to eat it alone. She knew that Brooke had her dream job in New York and there wasn’t even a chance of her moving to Chicago with her. She wouldn’t even dream of asking her to do that. The job would start on the 1st of December, so if she said yes, she’d have to leave in less than a month’s time to get settled in before she started working.

She took out Brooke’s laptop and started looking at apartments online. She knew this was dangerous, she shouldn’t be even entertaining the idea, but she was curious. Rent was a lot cheaper in Chicago. Almost half of what she was paying in New York. She just didn’t know what to do.

Thankfully, Vanessa had told her boss that she would need a couple of days to think about it. Realistically, she knew she would want to have a couple of days to think about it by herself and then a couple of days to psych herself up to talk to Brooke about it.

Vanessa couldn’t imagine living in another city, let alone without Brooke. She loved their apartment. She loved New York. She loved Brooke. So why was there a part of her that was considering accepting the offer?

—

31st of October 2019:

Vanessa was getting dressed up to go to her friend Yvie’s Halloween party. She had a super cute couple’s costume planned for her and Brooke to wear, but Brooke had cancelled on her at the last minute because of work. Yet again. She couldn’t believe that Brooke’s excuse for not going was solely because Halloween fell on a Thursday and Brooke didn’t want to be tired in work the next morning. Vanessa didn’t understand why she couldn’t even stop by for an hour or two but Brooke wouldn’t budge. When she said no, she meant it.

It was around 8pm when Vanessa had finished putting the final touches on her makeup and had started to work on her hair. As she wrapped her hair around the curling wand, she heard the door of the apartment open and heard Brooke’s heels clacking against the floor as she walked her way to their bedroom. Vanessa was slightly shocked that Brooke was home so early. It was the earliest Brooke had been home in weeks. A small part of her hoped that the reason Brooke had decided to come home early was that she had a change of heart and decided to join her at the party after all. But wow, did Vanessa get that one wrong.

“Why the hell were you looking at renting apartments in Chicago?” Brooke asked furiously. She had stormed into the bedroom so fast that Vanessa was a bit taken back by her speed. Vanessa let her hair fall from the curling wand and placed it on her desk so she didn’t burn herself. She was frozen in her seat; she had no idea what to say to Brooke. She knew she shouldn’t have kept this from Brooke and now Brooke was extremely angry.

She took a deep breath before she started to explain. “Basically, I got offered a promotion but I’d have to move to Chicago for it and I was just looking online out of curiosity to see—”

“And you didn’t even think to discuss this with me? We’re engaged, Vanessa! I feel like this is something we should’ve at least had a conversation about!,” Brooke yelled and Vanessa was speechless again. She knew something like this would’ve happened but she didn’t even bother to prevent it from happening. She just accepted that there would be an argument. “So what are you thinking of doing?” Brooke asked quietly and timidly, as if she was afraid of what Vanessa’s response was going to be.

“I think…I think I might take it.” Vanessa couldn’t even look Brooke in the eyes, she just stared at the floor.

“I can’t believe this. I cannot fucking believe this.” Brooke grabbed her coat and stormed out of the apartment without even looking back at Vanessa. All she could hear was the door slam and then Thackery came running into the bedroom to investigate what had happened. Vanessa picked him up and cuddled him close to her as she cried a little bit. She knew this was bad.

After Vanessa finished crying, she looked at the bed behind her and noticed that Brooke had left her phone on the bed. She tried to be mad at Brooke for not taking her phone with her when she was going out alone. Did she not know how dangerous that was? What if something happened? Now all Vanessa could do was worry.

She sent a quick text to Yvie, apologising that she couldn’t make it to the party after all. She climbed into bed with Brooke’s phone in her hands and decided that she wasn’t going to get any sleep at all that night so she might as well wait up for Brooke to come home. Then they could talk.

—

2nd of November 2019:

Two full days had passed and Vanessa still hadn’t heard from Brooke since she had stormed out on Halloween. The only form of contact she had received from her fiancé was a text from Nina to say that Brooke had decided to stay at her place for a while. Not even a phone call.

Vanessa was so angry and the only thing that had happened from Brooke being gone was the fact that it allowed Vanessa’s anger to grow and grow. Not only had she just left without saying where she was going, she hadn’t even been happy for Vanessa about her promotion. She knew she shouldn’t have kept it a secret from Brooke, that was wrong. But surely Brooke could’ve been at least a tiny bit happy for her? She knew if the roles were reversed, she would’ve been proud of Brooke, regardless of the situation.

It was in that moment that Vanessa decided that she had had enough of waiting around for Brooke to come home. She was going to go to Nina’s house and drag Brooke back to their apartment if she had to. She quickly threw on some jeans and a hoodie and just as she was putting her boots on, the door opened.

It was Brooke.

“Hi…” She said as she walked sheepishly over to the couch and sat down. Thackery immediately ran over to her and Brooke began to stroke his head gently. Vanessa stared at her in disbelief as she finally felt some sort of relief that Brooke had returned home safely.

“I think we need to have a talk, B…” Vanessa said softly and Brooke nodded her head in agreement.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Vanessa sat down in the armchair opposite where Brooke was sitting and there was an awkward silence in the room until Vanessa began to speak.

“Listen, Brooke, I’m so sorry for not telling you about it and I’m sorry you had to find out because I did it on your laptop but—”

“I think you should go to Chicago.” Vanessa couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Out of all the things she thought Brooke might say, that response didn’t even come into her mind.

“You do?,” Vanessa asked and Brooke nodded her head slowly while avoiding eye contact with Vanessa. “Okay, well, long distance will be hard but we can talk on the phone all the time and we can fly out to visit each other every few weekends…”

“No, babe, that’s not what I mean,” Brooke said with a voice full of sadness. Vanessa looked at her in confusion so Brooke decided to just continue speaking. “I don’t want to be the one to hold you back, Ness. You should go to Chicago and…we should break up.” Brooke said the last part so quietly that she wasn’t sure if Vanessa had even heard her but, judging by the look on her face, Vanessa had heard.

She was in shock. So much shock. She couldn’t believe Brooke was trying to break up with her right now…over a stupid job offer.

“I can find a smaller apartment here fast enough; I’ll be out of your way so you can pack up all your stuff for your move.” Brooke spoke like she was closing a business deal and not like she was breaking off an engagement and that really hurt Vanessa.

“Why are you doing this, Brooke?” Vanessa said with tears in her eyes and if Vanessa looked very closely, she could see that Brooke was holding back tears too.

“Because I think it’s what right in this situation.” Brooke replied and Vanessa held her breath to stop herself from exploding in anger.

“Don’t I get a say in this?,” Vanessa asked loudly and Brooke flinched at how loud her voice was. Brooke didn’t respond to Vanessa’s question, which only made Vanessa’s anger grow. “If long distance is the issue here, I can turn down the job, Brooke. It’s not worth ending our whole fucking relationship because of this!”

“No.” Brooke stated firmly as she wiped a tear away from her eyes.

“No?” Vanessa questioned, standing up and putting her hand on her hip.

“I can’t be the reason you turn down your dream job,” Brooke got up from the couch and stood right in front of Vanessa. “If we don’t break up, this relationship is going to turn toxic so quickly and we’re going to end up hating each other.”

“So this is your final decision?” Vanessa asked. On the outside, she looked like she didn’t give a shit what happened but on the inside, she was begging Brooke to change her mind.

“Yeah…it is.”

“Well then, I guess you were right when you said that we’d start to hate each other. Because I really hate you for doing this to me.” Vanessa grabbed her jacket and her bag and stormed out of the apartment in tears. All Brooke wanted to do was go after her but she knew she shouldn’t. They weren’t together anymore.

—

11th of November 2019:

Vanessa’s sister Alexis had agreed to come to the apartment with Vanessa to pack up all of her stuff before she left New York. It wasn’t a big apartment and Vanessa didn’t have that much stuff; she knew she could easily pack it all up in a day with no help. But being in that apartment alone would break her and she would spend the entire day crying. That’s why she needed her sister there to take her mind off of it and force her to get it all done and packed up.

Brooke was at work, thank God, so Vanessa didn’t have to worry about seeing her again. She didn’t know what she would do if that happened.

The majority of Brooke’s stuff was gone when Vanessa had arrived, apart from a few boxes that Brooke said she would pick up later when Vanessa was gone. It made Vanessa feel weird seeing their apartment so empty. She always pictured that when they moved out of the apartment, it would be to a house where they would spend the rest of their lives. She never imagined it would end like this.

Brooke had sent Vanessa a text saying that since Thackery was a gift to Vanessa, she should be the one to keep him. Of course, Vanessa was absolutely overjoyed that she didn’t have to lose Thackery too, he was like her baby. But she couldn’t help but feel angry that Brooke had just given him up so willingly. That she had just given Vanessa up so willingly.

As Vanessa finished packing up the last box of kitchen utensils, she had tears in her eyes. This was really it. She had packed her entire life up in just a few hours. 18 months of memories in their home vanished before her eyes.

“Are you sure you’re making the right decision here, Vanjie?” Alexis asked, rubbing her younger sisters back comfortingly while she cried.

“No…but it’s what Brooke Lynn wants and I can’t force her to be in a relationship with me. So it’s what’s happening.” After crying on the floor for a further thirty minutes, Vanessa regained herself and stood up. They began bringing the boxes downstairs in the elevator and once Alexis had taken the last box out of the apartment, Vanessa knew there was one thing she had to leave behind.

She took her engagement ring out of her pocket and left it on Brooke’s nightstand. Maybe she could return it and get her money back. Vanessa didn’t care what she did with it. As long as she didn’t have to look at it anymore, she was happy. As she closed the door to the apartment behind her with Thackery in her arms, she didn’t know what to expect from her new life in Chicago. She just hoped that it wouldn’t leave her as heartbroken as New York had.

—

22nd of December 2019:

The law firm that Brooke Lynn worked at had decided to close for a full two weeks during the Christmas period to allow their employees to have a well-deserved rest. To the majority of her colleagues, this had been amazing news. They got to spend so much time with their families over the holiday period and didn’t have to think about work until the new year. But for Brooke, this couldn’t have come at a worse time.

She was having to spend an entire day alone for the first time since Vanessa had moved to Chicago.

She had thrown herself into her work as soon as she had broken up with Vanessa, even more so than before the break up. She worked from 8am until 10 o’clock at night. She worked weekends and even took on more cases than she usually would just to ensure that she always had something to do. She didn’t want even a second to be alone with her thoughts because if she had that time, she wouldn’t recover from it.

Working pretty much all the time had its rewards: she had received yet another pay increase as well as a lot of recognition from the owners of the company. But none of that made her happy. She just felt empty. Empty like the apartment she was currently sitting in.

She had moved in at the beginning of December and she still hadn’t gotten around to unpacking everything, she had made herself that busy. As she looked around the tiny apartment, she felt awful. For the first time that month, she allowed herself to feel. All she wanted was Vanessa. But she knew she couldn’t have her.

She always knew that Vanessa was too good for her. The idea that Vanessa would be willing to give up her dream job for Brooke didn’t sit right with her. She just knew that Vanessa would end up resenting her for it down the line…and she couldn’t have that. She would rather let Vanessa go now and let her enjoy her life to the fullest instead of staying with her and getting married and then have Vanessa only realise what a mistake she had made after a couple of years had gone by. Vanessa didn’t deserve that. It was better this way. It had to be.

She lay down on the couch with a glass of Pinot Grigio in her hand and she knew that this was exactly how she would be spending the entire holiday season. Alone and miserable, on her couch with a glass of wine.

She took out her phone and went to the photo app. She knew this was a mistake but she couldn’t stop herself. There were pictures of their first date, of when they got Thackery, of when they got engaged. As Brooke sobbed, she locked her phone and downed the wine. It was then that she realised she had made the worst mistake of her entire life.

—

25th of December 2020:

Vanessa lit her Christmas scented candle in her new apartment and snuggled up on the couch under a warm, fuzzy blanket. She was trying to make the atmosphere around her seem very festive to hide the fact that she was miserable spending Christmas by herself.

Her mom had planned on coming to stay with her but her grandmother in Puerto Rico was super sick and Vanessa knew that her mom wouldn’t forgive herself if something happened to her grandma and she wasn’t there for it. She understood why she was alone. But just because she understood it did not mean she was okay with it.

She never imagined that she would ever have to spend Christmas by herself. She had no gifts to give to anyone and she certainly hadn’t received any. She hadn’t even made any friends at her new job yet. She was completely by herself.

Work was a lot more difficult than she thought it would be. There were a lot of new things she had to get used to and she definitely hadn’t settled in yet. She missed Brooke. She missed the familiarity of New York City. She missed knowing which restaurants were really good and which ones she should avoid. She missed having last minute plans and hanging out with her friends at a moments notice. She even just missed watching movies with Brooke in their apartment with Thackery cuddled up in between them.

To make matters worse, Thackery had not adapted to the new apartment at all. He simply had not gotten used to being in a new place. Vanessa couldn’t blame him, neither had she. He spent most of his time trying to escape from the apartment and when he wasn’t doing that, he was angrily meowing at the door. Vanessa had to give him attention at every second and if she stopped, he would have a meltdown. Vanessa knew the feeling.

She came to the conclusion that Thackery missed his other mom. She sat down on the kitchen floor with a bottle of tequila and Thackery by her side.

“I know, baby, I miss her too.”